He paused before continuing.
“I’m not expecting anything from you. And I know that I fucked up last night when I forgot the condom. I felt the intensity grow too, and I get that you’re not ready yet. Let’s focus on us and we’ll see where it leads. No expectations. No timelines on where we need to be. No pressure. We’ll set this at a pace you’re comfortable at. We’ll take a step back, lessen the intensity. Whatever it takes. Ashlin, I promise I understand what you’re saying. Stay honest with me if things get to be too much.”
This was what had me falling for Gael faster than I wanted to. He was able to understand me and get me in a way that no one ever had before. But if I let myself fall, what would happen if he left? I wasn’t ready to face the answer to that last question, considering my past.
“I will. Same goes for you with Harris. I need to know if things become too much. I don’t want to lose what we’ve found, Gael.”
“I will, Ashlin. I promise. We’ll find our way. I promise.”
My body ached. After lunch, I had come home and started feeling sick. I thought it might be stress and took a nap, but I had woken up feeling only worse. Aunt
Leelyn only had the old fashioned thermometers that you put underneath your tongue. I waited the necessary two to three minutes as I leaned my head against the cabinet and wished I was back in bed. The timer sounded and I looked at the thermometer. It read somewhere between one hundred and two to one hundred and three degrees.
My eye sockets hurt too badly to figure it out the exact number. I had a fever and that’s all I needed to know. Finding the medicine cabinet, I took some cold medicine and a fever reducer before heading back to my room to sleep. It was only four in the afternoon, but there was no way I was going to feel well enough for the date Gael had planned.
I picked up my phone and sent a quick text.
Me: I’m sick with a fever and feel awful. I need a rain check for tonight. Took cold medicine. I’m heading to bed.
Tossing my phone back on the dresser, I got under the cover as the chills formed all over my body. All I wanted to do was to sleep it off. Closing my eyes, I hoped the medicine kicked in before too long.
A cool washcloth pressed against my forehead. I removed it and tried to orient myself. Gentle hands felt my forehead. Gael’s hands.
I tried to sit up and failed as Gael pushed me back down.
“Hey, sweetheart. It’s me.” Gael’s thumb grazed my check. “I came to check on you when I realized I still had a key from the other day and couldn’t reach you. I think your fever is getting worse. Did you take anything for it?”
I nodded my head feebly. “Some fever reducer in the cabinet. I don’t remember the brand.”
There wasn’t a place on me that wasn’t throbbing, cold, or that I wanted to disconnect from my body. Strong arms came behind my back and lifted me. “Here, take two of these. This will help reduce your fever some more.”
I took the pills Gael handed me.
“Here drink some of this. I want you to stay hydrated. Have you been sick at all?”
I shook my head. It was easier than speaking.
“Okay, drink some if you can. Take slow sips and then see if you can rest some more. You’ve got about another hour before you can take more cold medicine if you took it about the time you texted me.”
Taking a slow drink from the straw, the liquid felt good against my throat. Gael was caring for me. I’d never been cared for while I was sick except when I had been here with Aunt Leelyn. Harris had always left to stay with his mom, not wanting to get sick himself.
Releasing the straw, Gael laid me back down.
“You might get sick, Gael. I don’t want you to get sick. You have so much going on with the restaurant.”
His warm voice soothed me. “Shh … get some rest. I’ll be fine. You’re my priority. Dad’s at the restaurant. Everything is handled.”
Not able to argue, I drifted back off to sleep.
DRIFTING AWAKE, I laid in bed waiting for the onslaught of nausea, achiness, and chills. It was mild compared to what it had been. My body felt drenched. I was still weak. Slightly turning my head, Gael slept in a brown worn leather recliner he had brought in from the other room. It nearly laid into a bed and was comfortable from what I remembered. I sat there and watched as his chest rose and his face was slack. He wore a T-shirt and cotton lounge pants. He was devastatingly handsome even in his sleep.
For the last few days, he had been there for me despite my protests that he could leave for his restaurant. It was all a blur, but I think I remembered his mom being here at one point or another. Needing to use the facilities, I started to the process of getting out of bed. My bones protested from the after effects of the flu.
Gael stirred and I froze, not wanting to wake him. I’m sure sleeping in the chair hadn’t been restful. Walking slowly, I made it to the restroom. From being practically bed ridden for the past few days, my vertigo was off and dizziness rolled through me. I used the counter for balance as I turned on the lights, which were bright. Giving myself a few minutes, I adjusted. After finishing, I splashed a little water on myself. A bath was going to be at the top of my priorities this morning. Seeing my toothbrush, I used it to scrub my teeth clean from all the yuckiness. With each small thing I did, I felt more human and more tired.
After seeing myself in the mirror, I wanted a shower now. I looked like death warmed over under the matted hair that had been haphazardly thrown back during the height of my fever. As I turned on the water on, a knock sounded at the door.
“Ashlin, how are you feeling?” Concern laced his voice.