“Are you okay?” he asked softly.
“No. I’m not. I want to scream and shout. I want to punch someone. I want to know why Mike did the things he did and then left me to live in a world of guilt and regret for so many years. Why couldn’t he have been man enough to just tell me the whole truth? Not just a sliver of it.”
He placed his hands on my shoulders but remained silent. I closed my eyes, enjoying his touch on my body. I loved that he didn’t feel like he had to say something; he was here for me. Letting me know if I needed him, he wasn’t far.
I leaned my body back against his, letting a long exhale.
“I feel like the last few minutes have been a terrible dream. It only just occurred to me I was in love with a man I knew nothing about. He lived in a different world, and I was clueless about all of it.”
Blake wrapped his arms around me and held me close.
I watched as a blue jay landed on a branch. It looked beautiful sitting in the tree.
“Everyone is keeping things from me. My own brother! Jarod. Butch. Please tell me you’re not keeping something from me too.”
A SINKING FEELING moved through me. So much had been kept from Morgan. So many lies told, truths withheld. She deserved so much better than this. She had said she wanted to leave the past in the past, and a part of me wanted that as well, but I knew deep in that if I didn’t tell her about my own past, I was no better than Mike and Jarod.
I swallowed hard. Now was not the time for that conversation, though. I had no idea how she would react when I told her about that night. I did know today was not the day to tell her.
“Do you want to go for a drive?” I asked.
She turned and faced me with a sweet smile. “Yes. I would love to go for a drive.”
Morgan was silent the first few minutes we were in the car.
“Penny for your thoughts.”
She looked my way as I waited at a red light.
“It’s hard to think I didn’t notice the signs about Mike’s whole other life. I thought we had this perfect little relationship. Dated in high school, college. He was my military guy who went off to serve his country while I waited dutifully until he returned. I feel so stupid.”
“You’re not stupid, Morgan. He lied to you.”
She chewed on her lip and looked straight ahead. “Do you still explore caves?”
With a grin, I replied, “I haven’t since the day of that dinner, but I love being in them.”
“It’s not dangerous?”
“Sure, it can be. There is something about it though that gives me a rush. Discovering places that maybe no other person has been to yet is thrilling. In a cave, I have to pay attention. I can think about what I’m doing and let everything else in the outside world go. I think that’s why my therapist suggested it. Why, you want to try it sometime?”
She laughed. “No. But I’ve never been in a cave.”
“What? Never? Not even when you were little? On a field trip?”
“Nope. Our class was supposed to go to one once, and I was so afraid I pretended I had a sore throat and stomachache. My mom let me stay home, but I think she knew all along I was afraid.”
“What about now? Would you go with me?”
I felt her heated stare. “I believe I would go anywhere with you, Blake Greene.”
My chest fluttered, and I reached over for her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Let me take you then. I know a guy who works at Longhorn Caverns. We might get a private tour.”
“No unexplored parts, though, right?”
“Promise,” I agreed with a slight chuckle.
“Did it help, exploring the caves?” she asked.