Knowing I had taken the Ativan and the Valium, guilt washed over my body. I was desperate for sleep and the hot bath had only relaxed me some. I’d never taken both before but the feeling of almost instant relaxation was too good to pass up.
Looking away from my mother, I pressed my lips together. “I know. I’m sorry.”
Taking my hand, my mother attempted to squeeze it. She was growing weaker by the day. “You go say you’re sorry to Grace.”
Capturing her eyes with mine, I smiled as I nodded my head. “Yes ma’am.”
Leaning over, I kissed her gently on the cheek before making my way through the house to find Grace.
Hearing her in the kitchen, I made my way there. Instantly, I could tell she was distant.
“Hey,” I whispered. Grace had been whipping eggs together in a bowl when I walked into the kitchen. Stopping, she turned and looked at me.
“There is one thing you better learn about me now, Noah. I will not be treated like a doormat.”
“I didn’t mean to treat you that way. I’m sorry if I made you feel like that, Grace.”
Worrying her bottom lip, Grace glanced down. “How many pills did you take?”
“What?” I asked, even though I heard her question.
Grace looked at me as we stared into each other’s eyes. “Pills, Noah. How many of them did you take? You were knocked out for two days.”
“I’m not a child, Grace, and I don’t need looking after. I know how many prescription pills to take.”
Walking by her, I reached for the coffee pot, only to have Grace grab my arm. Narrowing her eyes, Grace stared at me. “I will not stand by and watch you become dependent on those pills.”
Letting out a nervous chuckle, I said, “I’m not dependent on them, Grace.”
“Then tell me how many you took, Noah,” Grace said as her eyes turned glassy.
“I took one Ativan. I hadn’t been sleeping but a few hours a night. It must have all caught up to me. I guess knowing you were here, I felt relaxed knowing my mother was okay.”
Grace continued to stare at me and I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold back the truth from her. “And one Valium. I also took a Valium.”
Closing her eyes, Grace slowly shook her head. “Noah, you can’t do that ever again. Promise me you won’t do that again.”
Seeing the love in her eyes, and hearing the concern in her voice, I did just what she asked. “I promise, Grace. I won’t ever take them both together again.”
Grace smiled as she reached up and kissed me. “We’re going to do this together. You and me. You’re not alone. You don’t need the pills.”
Placing my hand behind her neck, I pulled her lips to mine as I kissed her. Grace’s kisses were always my weakness. She tasted of pure honey. It wasn’t long before Grace was turning off the stove and I was picking her up to carry her upstairs.
“Make love to me, Noah,” Grace spoke against my lips.
Before we made it to the stairs, the front door opened and Angela walked in. Stopping in my tracks, I quickly set Grace down. Angela’s face turned red as she nodded at us and quickly walked by. “I’ll just be heading on back to check on, Mrs. Bennet.”
Peeking over to Grace, I watched as she shot daggers at Angela the entire time she walked through the house. Turning back to me, her hands went to her hips and she let out a huff. “I told her to give me her key, but she wouldn’t. She said you told her you needed her to have it in case you didn’t hear her at the door.”
“It’s hard, Grace. When I do finally fall asleep, I’m out and I’m only tuned in to my mother’s voice. There have been plenty of times Angela has had to bang on the door and call the house for me to let her in.”
Something moved across Grace’s face and I wasn’t able to read it. Before I was able to say anything to her, she walked by me and back into the kitchen. Frowning, I turned and followed her. “Are you mad?” I asked as she turned the stove back on.
Without looking at me, Grace shook her head. “This is your house, Noah. You need to do what you feel is right and safe for your mother. I’m not mad; I’m upset that we were interrupted. I was looking forward to being with you.”
Smiling, I walked up behind Grace and pulled her against my body. She needed to feel how much I was disappointed myself.
“I promise I’ll make it up to you later, Grace.”