be heard by him. I tossed my coat on my bed. "If you don't want her to know you're inhere..."
Josh nodded, his mouth set in a grim line. "Got it."
He placed his jacket on the back of my chair and put his battered leather messenger bag down
near his feet. His hands went directly into the back pockets of his paint-stained jeans, as if he was
afraid of what he might do with them if they weren't secured. Or afraid of what I might do if he
kept them within reach.
"So," he said.
"So," I replied, my heart pounding so loud that between it and FOB, I could barely hear.
"How a
re you?" he asked. "Are you okay?"
His eyes were so full of concern, I wanted to cry. How could he possibly be so nice to me after
everything? Yes, he'd already known about the Dash thing before everyone else had--had caught
the live show the night of the Legacy before the film adaptation had hit the airwaves. But now that
everyone in school had seen it and knew what I had done to him, shouldn't he be hating me with a
vengeance? I had humiliated him.
"I'm... fine," I lied with a shrug.
It was obvious he didn't believe me, but I was still stuck on the
85
unbelievable fact that he was right there. Right in my room. The two of us. Alone. How many times
had I wished for exactly this? How many times had I prayed I would just get one more chance to
explain? To win him back? And here I was, a rock the size of a softball in my throat, unable to form
a single word in case whatever came out might scare him away.
"I'm really sorry all of this is happening to you," Josh said, running a hand through his curls and
looking at the ground. "I know I've been an ass lately, but--"
"Josh, I'm so sorry," I blurted, his words dissolving the softball just like that. "I'm so sorry for
everything that happened with Dash. It didn't mean anything, and if I could go back and take it all
back, I would do it. You have to know that," I said desperately. "Please, I just... I really need you to
know that."
I choked on the last few words, and Josh took a step toward me. For a second I thought he was
going to take my hand, but then he thought better of it and merely squeezed my upper arm