The next morning, Ariana watched from her window as the weak November sun lit the facades of Atherton-Pryce Hall’s redbrick buildings. Down below, Maria headed out in gray sweats and a pink fleece jacket, her toe shoes slung over her shoulder, walking briskly toward her early-morning workout in the dance studio. Once Maria turned the corner around the dining hall, Ariana went to the mirror on the back of her dorm room door. She mussed her hair a bit, trying to make it look as if she’d just woken up, then cinched her white silk robe and headed for the room Lexa and Maria shared at the end of the hall.
Everything’s going to be just fine, she told herself as she padded silently along the thick carpeting. She just needs a good talking-to.
She paused in front of the closed dorm room door, took a deep breath, and knocked lightly.
“Come in!” Lexa said, her voice surprisingly bright.
Ariana opened the door and poked her head inside tentatively. Lexa was already showered and dressed, her red sweater wrinkle free over boyfriend jeans and brown boots.
“You’re up early,” she said to Ariana with a smile.
“Not as early as you,” Ariana replied.
“I have to do some last-minute cramming for my French test,” Lexa said. “I’m gonna hit the library before breakfast. You wanna come?”
Ariana eyed her quizzically. Was this chipper thing for real? “Actually, I have to go into the city today. To meet with that lawyer,” she said.
Lexa closed her eyes and brought her hand to her forehead. “That’s right. I’m so sorry! Is there anything I can do?”
“No, thanks. I’ll be fine,” Ariana replied. “I just wanted to see how you were doing this morning. Are you feeling better?”
Lexa tilted her head as she fluffed her pillow two, five, then ten times. “Yeah. I am.” She laughed in an embarrassed way, then lifted her folded blanket from her desk chair and spread it across her bed. “I was just overtired,” she said, turning her back toward Ariana as she moved around the bottom of the bed, smoothing out the wrinkles. “You may not remember this about me, but when I get overtired, my whole system freaks out. And lately? I really haven’t been sleeping a lot.”
Ariana wondered if the real Briana Leigh would have remembered this tidbit about Lexa from their time together at equestrian camp as kids. Her guess was probably not. Briana Leigh was a tad too self-involved to recall details about other people.
“Oh,” Ariana said, feeling slightly better as she click, click, clicked the stapler. “Well, how did you sleep last night?”
“Okay, I guess,” Lexa said with a shrug. “At least, I definitely slept at some point, because I remember having a dream.” She narrowed her eyes. “Something about my parents parachuting through the roof of my house. Isn’t that weird?” Lexa laughed and then shook her head. “Anyway, any sleep at all is an improvement.”
She stopped primping the bed, and turned to Ariana. “Honestly, don’t worry about me. I’m totally fine. I just feel bad that I made you worry.”
Ariana breathed a sigh of relief. Everything was okay. All Lexa had needed was a good night’s sleep, and she was herself again.
“Oh, that’s all right,” she said.
Lexa unexpectedly wrapped Ariana in a hug. “Do you want me to come with you today? I’m sure I could make up the test.”
“No, thanks. I’m sure it’ll be fine. I just want to get it over with,” Ariana replied, edging toward the door. “I’m going to go take a shower. I mean, as long as you’re all right. . . .”
“Of course I’m all right,” Lexa said, turning back toward her bed and smoothing out a wrinkle that wasn’t there. “Why shouldn’t I be all right? I mean, just because I aided and abetted a murder, and just because the dead body of my former friend who tried to kill me is buried in my backyard, and just because if anyone ever finds it we’re both going to jail and my entire family will be ruined, I mean, why would any of that make me not all right?”
Ariana stopped with her hand on the doorknob. “Lexa?”
Suddenly Lexa sat down o
n her perfectly made bed, buried her face in her hands, and burst into tears.
Oh, I am so very, very screwed, Ariana thought.
Watching her friend blubber uncontrollably, Ariana’s heart started to pound real terror through her veins. She breathed in and out, in and out, but it didn’t help. The telltale gray dots started to prickle over her vision. She gripped her forearm in one hand and squeezed as hard as she could, trying to keep herself present. Trying to keep herself in the now.
Trying to keep herself from snapping.
Breathe, Ariana. Just breathe.
In, one . . . two . . . three . . .
Out, one . . . two . . . three . . .