A lot had changed.
Daniel backed out of the room and closed the door behind him, deciding that he needed to figure out what the fuck his plan was, because blundering through this was just going to ensure that Hope would drive back to Dallas at the first available opportunity and take his baby with her.
And this time she might not be back.
Chapter Six
Hope slept horribly, unable to get the look on Daniel’s face out of her head. The one that showed up when he caught sight of her leg. It was all guilt and pity and something almost like disgust. She shuddered and rolled over to bury her face in the pillow. She hadn’t been celibate for the last thirteen years, but she’d been very selective over who she’d let get close enough to actually see her 100 percent naked. She might be mostly at peace with her body, but she didn’t need the kick in the teeth that came when a potential lover made their excuses to leave as soon as her pants came off.
It hadn’t happened yet, but the fear never quite went away.
A five a.m. she sat up, her full bladder making it impossible to procrastinate any longer. Her leg still hurt like nobody’s business, but she’d be damned before she limped her way to the bathroom. She’d powered through worse pain before, and no doubt she’d do it again, but she wasn’t going to give Daniel an excuse to offer to carry her again.
It’s not forever. I might have panicked in a big way and come back here, but that doesn’t mean I’m staying. Once this is over…
That was the problem. If she was pregnant, this wasn’t something she could just smile and keep on keeping. They were talking about a baby. With Daniel. Hope pushed to her feet. She’d thought it was intense enough having her past tied to him in more ways than she cared to count. To have her future tied to him as well was just… She didn’t know what it was, but it didn’t make her comfortable in the least.
She opened the door—and screamed. “Oh my God, what’s wrong with you?”
Daniel held up one of the pregnancy test boxes. “I know you, and now that you’ve had some time to calm down, you’d have no problem sneaking into the bathroom and taking this test without letting me know.” He held the box just out of reach, still blocking the doorway. “If this is positive, that changes things, Hope.”
She wasn’t an idiot. It would change everything. Her mind couldn’t quite encompass the possibilities, couldn’t take a single step past taking the test. “Give me the test.”
“I’ve made my point.” He handed it over.
“Bully for you.” Having this box in her hand meant there was no more opportunity for stalling. It was happening. She was going to walk into the bathroom, and when she walked back out again, there would be no more room for maybe. She turned to look at the single window in the guest bedroom. The sun hadn’t even begun to creep past the horizon. If she was back in Dallas, she’d be on her way to morning yoga and thinking about the odds and ends she wanted to accomplish this weekend.
“Running won’t help anything.”
She turned back and glared, hating that he was standing there, appearing to be calm and collected while she was falling apart. “Get out of my way before I piddle on your floor like your damn puppy.”
“Don’t bite my head off.” He moved out of the way, waiting until she was to the bathroom door before he responded, “And Ollie’s house-trained, so you following her example wouldn’t be so bad.”
She resisted chucking the box at his face, but only barely. Instead, she very carefully shut the door and made a point of engaging the lock. The very last thing she needed was Daniel barging in to watch her pee on a stick, and if the stubborn look on his face was any indication, he was actually considering it.
Hope double-checked the instructions—as if they would have changed from the half a dozen times she’d read them in the grocery aisle—and took a deep breath.
It was now or never.
It took entirely too little time to finish and set the stick aside. She washed her hands, brushed her teeth using his toothpaste and her finger, and then went ahead and used his mouthwash for good measure. She was stalling and knowing she was stalling. Banging on the door made her jump half out of her skin. She swore under her breath and jerked the door open. “What?”
Daniel searched her face. “Well?”
She didn’t have to turn around to know exactly where the test sat—on the back of the toilet. Taunting her. All she had to do was walk those three steps to it and see if that idiotproof thing read Pregnant or Not Pregnant. Simple.
Except she couldn’t take that first step.
Hope looked up at Daniel and had the sudden urge to just break down. If she did, he’d be there for her. He always had been.
Except that wasn’t the truth. When she’d needed him the most, he hadn’t been there for her. Leaning on him now was just setting herself up for disappointment and heartache. She’d had enough of both to last her a lifetime.
Hope took a careful step back, and then another. Using every ounce of willpower she had, she turned and picked up the test. Her breath left her lungs in an audible whoosh. “Shit.”
Pregnant.
Maybe that whole idea of building a time machine to go back to before she thought it was a brilliant idea to have sex with Daniel was a legitimate idea after all.
A big, tanned hand appeared in her line of vision and took the stick from her. “Well, hell.”
She looked up, the shock on Daniel’s face startling a laugh out of her. It was that or start sobbing and never stop. She’d always been a damn fool when it came to this man, but this was so above and beyond as to be laughable. She clutched her stomach, her giggle turning into a string of them, each one more hysterical than the one before. “Oh my God. I can’t. This is… Oh my God.”
“Darling? Damn, girl, breathe.”
She slumped against the wall. “This is so dumb. This kind of thing is supposed to happen to teenagers, not to adults who should know better. We’re fifteen years too late.” At least if they’d done it when they were teenagers, they would have had love on their side.
Love. And where did that get us?
She scrubbed her hands over her face, trying to get a hold of her emotional free fall. The wondering about what would have happened was pointless. It had happened. End of story. Now it was time to figure out a plan for moving forward.
A baby. What am I supposed to do with a baby?
Being a single mother had never been part of the vision she had for the future.
All at once, her determination to keep moving abandoned her, leaving her staring at the bathroom cabinet. It was like thousands of other bathroom cabinets out there, a light cedar color in a generic style. It was just so wrong—just like everything else about this situation. “How did this happen?”
“I’m sorry, darling. It’s my fault.” He crouched in front of her. “The condom…the sex…it was all me.”
That was just like Daniel to try to take all the responsibility—and the guilt—onto his shoulders alone. “You know, that determination to play the martyr and absolve me from guilt is really annoying.” She leaned her head against the wall. “Pretty sure I was there. Equally sure that I’d just switched birth controls and neither that nor the fact that you pulled a condom out of your wallet was enough to make me stop and use my common sense.”
“All the same—”
“No, Daniel. Not all the same. It took the two of us to get into this mess. I’m an adult, same as you, and I knew what the possible consequences were.” She just hadn’t cared, because being kissed by Daniel after all those years had been too good to stop. It had seemed like it was worth the risk at the time.
Now?
Now, she just didn’t know.
He offered her a hand. “We need to talk about this. Really talk.”
That’s what she was afraid of. She allowed him to pull her to her feet and shoved her hair out of her eyes. “We don’t need to talk. I already know how this conversation goes.”
“Do you
now?”
“Yes.” She charged on, talking so fast her words spilled over each other. “I’m keeping the baby.”