sweet tooth, but I suspect my daughter sent them for me to give to guests. So they’ve served their purpose, I suppose!’
It seemed a shame that Jack and Claude were the only guests she had to share them with, but Jack couldn’t help but feel grateful for the glimpse of the Maple Drive he’d been hoping for when he moved there.
‘Your daughter won’t be with you for Christmas?’ He knew it could be difficult to get everyone together over the holidays, but he didn’t like the thought of Kathleen alone this Christmas Day. And he couldn’t help but think that if she were his mum, he’d make a point of being there. A hamper wasn’t the same as company, after all.
Kathleen shook her head. ‘Unfortunately not. She says she wants to be, of course, but … she lives in Australia, you see, and her husband’s family are all over there …’ She sighed. ‘They’re hoping to come over in the spring, instead, which will be nice. And perhaps my son will be able to join them – he’s working over in America at the moment, on a five-year contract. But he’s met a girl, so whether or not he comes back at all, we’ll have to wait and see. All I know is that they’re keeping him too busy to come home for Christmas!’
‘You didn’t think about going over there?’ Kathleen was obviously disappointed to not have her family visiting, but then, America was a long way – and Australia even further.
‘No, not really.’ She gave him a half smile. ‘It’s probably just old age, or maybe I just did too much travelling in my younger days, but these days I just can’t face getting on a plane. Lily and Hugh keep trying to persuade me to move out to Australia with them, where they can look after me. They go on and on about the quality of life, the opportunities, the weather … but I lived abroad for so many years, now I really just want to spend my last days here, at home. Where I belong.’
‘I know that feeling,’ Jack admitted. ‘But I’m sure you’ve got plenty of days left to enjoy your home!’
‘I hope so! But not as many as you.’ She studied him critically. ‘So, you’ve spent time abroad too? Of course you have. Army?’
Jack nodded. ‘Ten years. I saw a lot more of the world than I ever imagined existed when I was twenty-one.’
‘I would say the same,’ Kathleen said, with a grin. ‘But I was married to a civil servant in the Foreign Office by the time I was nineteen. My whole world suddenly opened up, and I loved every moment of it.’
Jack thought about all the parcels he’d delivered to Kathleen over the last few months, each with exotic postmarks and interesting stamps, and often in unusual shapes and sizes. ‘I did wonder. You get a lot more post from overseas than most people on my patch!’
‘I still have a lot of friends, all over the world,’ Kathleen said. ‘Mostly we email, or Skype occasionally – it’s amazing how easy it is to keep in touch these days. And many of them like to send packages at this time of year. I ship out a lot of tea and biscuits, myself!’
‘I can imagine,’ Jack said, with a laugh. ‘But still, it’s not the same as being with them, is it? Seeing the people you love, day after day, whenever you want.’
‘No,’ Kathleen admitted. ‘It’s not. So, how are you finding civilian life?’
‘It’s taken a little adjusting to,’ Jack admitted. ‘When you’re in the forces, they take care of everything for you – I never had to worry about registering with a doctor before, or finding a place to rent or even buying my own socks! Everything I needed just showed up when I needed it, or I could just go down to stores and get it. Even my friends were just there, whenever I needed them.’
They sat in silence for a moment, sipping their tea, the only noise the sound of Claude wolfing down biscuits.
Then Kathleen said, ‘You miss them, then? Your army family?’
How had she known? That they weren’t just friends to him, they were family. The only family he’d known since his parents died.
‘They are family, aren’t they?’ Kathleen went on, as if she’d read his mind. ‘When you’re together like that, strangers in a foreign land – and I imagine even training in this country you’re that too. It must be nearly impossible for outsiders to understand the life you live, the challenges you face, the risks you take. So the people you serve with …’
‘They become your brothers and sisters,’ Jack admitted. ‘And your parents, your children. Your people. It’s been … hard. Leaving them behind.’
‘I’m sure. Are you still in touch, though?’
Jack nodded. ‘When we can be. We Skype occasionally. Email. Same as you, I suppose. But most of them, they have other people they want to talk to, when there’s time. Their real family.’
‘And you don’t? No family on the outside?’
‘Not any more.’ Jack set down his empty teacup. How had he ended up opening up to this stranger? Were his secrets so cheaply bought, for a cup of tea and a mince pie?
Or maybe he’d just been waiting for somebody to tell them to. Someone who would understand.
He looked down at Claude, who was watching him from his seat on the floor. It sounded crazy, even in his head, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that Claude had brought him into Kathleen’s house for a reason. That he’d sensed that Kathleen needed the company – and maybe that Jack did, too.
Kathleen tilted her head as she looked at him. ‘I have to ask … why did you leave? What were you looking for, back in the civilian world?’
And wasn’t that just the question he’d been asking himself lately?
Jack fiddled with the silver case from his mince pie. ‘Well …’
‘I’m sorry,’ Kathleen interrupted. ‘You don’t have to tell me. My daughter’s always telling me I’m too nosy, asking all these questions.’
‘No, it’s okay,’ Jack assured her. ‘In fact … it’s nice to have someone ask, to be honest.’
Kathleen smiled, with the same understanding she’d shown since he arrived. ‘Well, in that case …’
‘I guess it was just time. Ten years … that was a third of my life. And I loved it, I did. But I didn’t want it to be the only thing I ever did. I wanted to have a life of my own as well, outside of the army. A place where I belonged. I just haven’t quite found it yet.’
‘And why is that, do you think?’
Jack considered. He’d been so sure he was looking in the wrong place, that Maple Drive couldn’t give him what he wanted. But what he’d been looking for was a community, a place where he might be invited in for a cup of tea and a chat, where he would know everyone’s names. And yes, maybe a place where he might find love, family, and a future that he was excited to wake up to every morning. But those things took time, like Bill said. And right now …
Well, there he was, drinking tea and having that chat – thanks to Claude, anyway. And he did know all his neighbours names, even if they didn’t know his yet. But maybe that was because he hadn’t told them. Hadn’t said, ‘Hi, I’m Jack. I’m your new postman – and I live around the corner, by the way.’
Yes, the inhabitants of Maple Drive might not all make much of an effort to get to know each other. But in the last twelve hours he’d had long, proper conversations with most of them – starting with Mrs Templeton and her aversion to icicle lights, then Holly and her cat lead, all the neighbours who didn’t know Claude, and now Kathleen.
Not bad for one day. And he hadn’t even been trying.
Imagine how he might get on if he made an actual effort.
‘I think,’ he said, realising that Kathleen was still waiting for an answer to her question. ‘I think I was waiting for it to come to me, rather than going out and looking for it. But I think I’m ready for that to change, too.’
Kathleen beamed. ‘Well, that is good news! So, tell me about this life you’re looking for then. When you get to my age, other people’s dreams and ambitions are the only things you can look forward to!’
It was the second time she’d said something like that, like there was nothing left to her life except waiting for the end. And yes, okay, she wasn’t
young any more, Jack could see that. But still, he didn’t like the idea of Kathleen counting down to her death.
Suddenly, he wanted to give her something to look forward to. Something to remind her that there were still good things in the world for her.
But how on earth would he, Jack Tyler, go about that? He had no idea.
So instead, he settled back to tell her about his hopes for his new, civilian life.
‘I guess I was looking for somewhere to belong, more than anything.’ As he spoke, he felt a furry head press against his leg, and reached down to rub Claude between the ears. The little dog apparently took that as permission to jump up into his lap.
Kathleen smiled at the sight. ‘Looks to me like you belong to somebody already.’
Jack shook his head. ‘This little fella is only on loan,’ he explained. ‘As soon as the McCawleys get home, he’s going back.’
‘Perhaps,’ Kathleen replied. ‘But I think you’ve made an impact on him already. And once a dog is attached to someone … he won’t forget you anyway, is my bet.’
‘That’s a nice thought,’ Jack admitted. He quite liked the idea of Claude popping out to say hello whenever he had post for number 11. He looked down at the small dog in his lap. His ears were lowered, and Jack suspected his eyes were closed. Every now and again his rear end wiggled, as if he were wagging his stumpy tail. ‘In the meantime, I’d better go and see if I can find him a home for the night. I’m not allowed pets at my rental,’ he explained.
Kathleen looked concerned. ‘Any ideas? I’d take him myself, but I’m a little too old to learn how to care for a dog!’
‘You’re never too old,’ Jack said. ‘But don’t worry. I’m going to take him next door to Holly, first, and return her lead. I’m sure the McCawleys will be back by then.’ As long as they hadn’t gone away. But if they had … surely they’d have realised Claude was missing and come back for him by now? Or made arrangements for someone to take care of him?