It would be back, he knew. This was only a temporary fix. One kiss would never be enough.
Regretfully, Jake pulled back, although his fingers stayed clutching the fabric at her hip as she let out a whimper of disappointment. He rested his forehead against hers, just for a moment. Just long enough to whisper, “I know. I know,” and have her understand that everything she felt, he felt too.
“We really do need to talk,” she murmured back, and Jake nodded, even as he stepped back. He couldn’t look away from those wide eyes, though.
“Later,” he promised.
She pulled a face, but agreed. “Tell me one thing, though?”
One thing. How hard could that be? “Sure.”
“What changed today?”
He didn’t bother pretending he didn’t know what she meant. What had changed today? Every assumption he had about the future. About his place in a family that could never really be his.
But most of all, he’d realised that pretending he didn’t want the only thing he’d ever wanted with such furious passion was a waste of time.
He smiled, an apologetic, gentle smile, he hoped. “Everything.”
Her answering smile was warm. “I know exactly what you mean.”
Chapter 12
CHRISTMAS DAY
Ever since she was a little girl, Molly had never been able to sleep on Christmas Eve. Long after Tim let slip that Father Christmas wasn’t real, even into the years where she’d stumbled into bed from the pub ages after her stocking had been filled and left on the end of her bed, there was something about the anticipation of the day to come that left her staring at the ceiling for hours after she turned in.
This year, it all seemed a thousand times worse.
Not only did she have the joys of Christmas Day to look forward to, but Jake had finally promised her a proper conversation about their… situation. Which meant she had to figure out what she actually wanted to say.
Jake, I made this resolution, and then my friend challenged me, so I kind of have to sleep with you before New Year. Then I’m back off to London and you don’t have to see me again until next Christmas. Okay?
Somehow, she wasn’t quite sure that was going to cut it. Which was weird because, a week ago, that kind of proposition was exactly the sort she thought Jake would like. No emotions, no strings, just one night of fun.
Okay, so how about…
Jake, I’m going insane because I can’t stop thinking about what it would be like to have you. Give me one night, and I’ll make damn sure it’s the best one either of us have ever had.
Except, while she sure that would be the case for her, Jake had considerably more experience in bedroom activities, from what she could tell. How the hell could she make that promise to him? He’d laugh her out of the bedroom.
So, maybe…
Jake, I’m sorry, I forgot to get you a Christmas present this year. But I’ve thought of a way to make it up to you…
Turning over, Molly buried her groan in her pillow. This was impossible.
And the worst thing was, all these scenarios anticipated her being alone with Jake at some point tomorrow, and being able to do anything about the ridiculous levels of sexual tension they had now reached. When, in truth, they’d be spending the day opening presents with her family, peeling carrots and watching Doctor Who.
It was Christmas. She had to focus on her family, not her libido.
And for the first time, that felt like a real sacrifice.
As always, she must have slept eventually – although not before she heard her bedroom door creak open and felt the familiar weight of a fully laden stocking laid on her feet. But when she had closed her eyes to hide the fact she was awake from her dad, she must have actually dropped off because the next thing she knew, Tim was screaming, “It’s CHRISTMAS!” from the top of the attic stairs and playing Slade at full volume.
Molly checked her clock. Seven thirty. That was a lot better than some years.
Rubbing at her eyes, she grabbed her stocking and headed down to the kitchen in search of coffee.
“You’re up early,” she said, smiling as she watched Jake make coffee in the dim light of the under cabinet lamps.
He turned and, leaving the coffee half made, stepped towards her, heat in his eyes. Molly swallowed. This really was a different Jake to just a few days ago.
“Merry Christmas, Molly,” he murmured, his lips barely millimetres away from hers.
“The others—” He cut her off with a kiss, and the warmth of his arms around her made her forget whatever she’d been about to say anyway. God, she could kiss this man for hours…
The creak from the stairs behind her barely registered with Molly, but by the time Dory entered the kitchen Jake was already back by the kettle, stirring mugs of coffee ready to hand out.
Molly blinked, and dropped to sit in one of the kitchen chairs, her stocking full of presents at her feet.
“Where’s Tim?” Dory asked, looking between them with what Molly hoped wasn’t suspicion as she leant her stocking against the kitchen cupboards. What had gotten into Jake? The pub the night before was one thing, but right there in the kitchen with the family about to descend?
“I think he disappeared into the bathroom.” Jake handed Dory a mug of coffee. “After ensuring that none of us were ever going to get any more sleep.”
“Apart from your mother,” Glen announced. “She still has her earplugs in so slumbers on, oblivious.”
“Lucky lady.” Lucas appeared behind him, stocking hanging from one hand. Dory handed over her mug with a sympathetic smile.
“Jet lag getting you down, Lucas?” Molly asked.
“I don’t think we can hold the jet lag entirely responsible for this one.” Lucas took a long gulp of coffee. “Although if there are any more of those little pies around that might help…”
“I think we can help with that.” Dory pulled the lid off the large cake tin in the middle of the kitchen table and doled out a lattice topped mince pie. “Probably until the end of time,” she added, staring at the ridiculous quantity of mince pies still remaining.
“What are you all doing in here?” Tim asked, appearing in the doorway with his iPod speakers in one hand, now playing Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree, and his filled stocking in the other. “We have to open the stockings around the tree. You know this, people!”
“Just getting some caffeine first.” Molly held up her mug. “Besides, Mum’s still asleep.”
“Not anymore she isn’t.” Tim gave a wicked grin, then disappeared into the lounge, obviously expecting them to follow.
Molly glanced back at Jake as the others made their way through. “Where’s your stocking?”
“I left it upstairs, I think.”
Oh, honestly. “You know the rules, Jake. Tell me you didn’t open it already?”
“I wouldn’t dare. But, can I just say, it’s kind of creepy hearing your dad sneak into the bedroom and leave it on my bed.”
“It’s not creepy,” Molly said, rolling her eyes at him. “It’s festive and nice. Besides, it wasn’t Dad, it was Santa.”
“I think that might be even worse.” He smiled, a private sort of smile she knew he wouldn’t risk giving her if anyone else were in the room. “Besides, I don’t need to open it. I already got what I wanted most for Christmas.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Really?” Because in that case, he really wasn’t wishing hard enough.
“I got to kiss you.” Jake shrugged. “I’m happy.”
Molly stared after him as he sauntered out still sipping on his coffee. She was starting to think this One Night With Jake idea wasn’t at all what she thought it was. And she knew for certain that she was very, very out of her depth.
With a deep breath, she picked up her stocking and followed, just in time to see Jake disappearing upstairs to fetch his own stocking. She wanted to go after him, to finally get him alone in a room with a bed, but her family was waiting. For a moment she s
tood, undecided, just inside the kitchen doorway where, apparently, her brother and sister couldn’t see her, as she suddenly realised they were talking about her.
Next to the front door, just beside the door to the lounge, Tim and Dory stood with their heads close together. They were keeping their voices low, but if Molly concentrated she could make out enough words to follow the gist of the conversation.
“I’m just not sure it’s a good idea,” Dory said, frowning. “You know how Molly is.”
Molly tensed at the sound of her name, ducking a little further back into the kitchen just in case either of them looked over.
“Don’t worry,” Tim replied. “I’ve already spoken with her. Told her that he’s not her type.”
“Like that would ever stop her! Come on, Tim. Tell Molly she can’t do something and you know she’s going to go right out and try.” Molly bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself arguing back. Honestly. They made it sound like she hadn’t grown up any more since the age of twelve.
“Yeah, maybe,” Tim conceded, and Molly seriously considered taking his present back. “I was kind of drunk and not really thinking it through.”
“Tim!” Dory sounded despairing. Good.
“But it’s okay! Turns out that Jake was listening in.”
“How is that better?” Dory asked. “Poor Jake. He’ll think it’s something to do with him.”