words.
Though her head was down, she could still see his feet just inside the door. He reached down to pick up the black bag.
“You probably guessed what this was and you’re partially right. The submissive you saw me talking with weeks ago before I exited the club, Rachel? Her fiancé told me about this local lady who makes all her toys by hand, and after he showed me the work she’d done for him, I called her. I can’t tell you how much fun I had picking out new toys to use on you.”
She knew he already had toys in his possession. Old ones. Ones he’d used on Winnie. She hadn’t considered how it would feel if he used those on her, but now that she did, she realized how thankful she was that he’d wanted to purchase new toys. Further proof he was putting the past behind him and facing the future.
He dropped the bag beside her, his body in front of her. “But right now, I’m not going to use toys on you.”
He wasn’t? She frowned.
“While I think you look lovely in that gown, I want you to stand and take it off for me.”
Maybe he was going to play without toys. That would be fine by her. She liked the idea of him only using his hands. And other body parts. She quickly rose to her feet, smiled, and within seconds had the gown off. Lennox took it from her and hung it in a nearby closet.
“I’m going to ask you to do something,” he said, his voice low and calm but filled with authority all the same. “I know it’s going to be extremely difficult for you, but I’m going to ask you to at least try. For me.”
Her mind raced, trying to imagine what he could possibly have in mind. Their hard limits were almost identical.
“Don’t frown,” he said. “At least not before you’ve heard what it is.”
She forced herself to relax her expression.
“Very good.” He walked backward to the bed and sat down. Why was he sitting down? It made no sense. “To begin, I’m going to ask you a few questions. What do you do for a living?”
This was hands down the oddest way to start a BDSM scene that she had ever heard of. If he hadn’t been acting as a consultant for the last few weeks, she’d have thought maybe he’d been out of the lifestyle too long.
“I’m a dance instructor, Sir,” she answered, deciding to go along with it. She trusted him. But why had he said this would be difficult?
“You told me once that you didn’t have any trouble dancing for work. Is this still the case?”
“Yes, Sir.”
“When was the last time you danced outside of work?”
She could be bratty and say of course she had danced outside of work, after all, she’d done it when she danced with him. But that wasn’t the type of dancing he was talking about and she’d been the one to tell him that, if nothing else, they should have honesty between them.
Her belly began to ache as she slowly started to understand where this conversation was going. God help her.
“It was before the fall students arrived, Sir,” she said in a voice barely above a whisper.
“When was the last time you tried to dance outside of work?”
“The last time I tried was probably sometime in September, Sir.”
“Do you want to dance again? Stop and think before you answer.”
She allowed the question to sink into her soul, down into the depths of who she was. And when it made it there, the answer was clear. She was a dancer. She danced.
“Yes, Sir. Please,” she whispered as if he held the key to her ability to dance.
“Dance for me, Marie,” he spoke in his low and commanding Dom voice. “Don’t think. Close your eyes and let your body move.”
Tears filled her eyes, because he thought it was just that easy. Close her eyes and move. Like she hadn’t done that a thousand times. Now it would be one thousand and one. Worse still, she would disappoint him and she hated that because they hadn’t even done anything yet.
But she wanted to do everything she could to please him, so she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She heard him move from the bed and seconds later, the familiar sound of Mozart filled the air.
Her breathing was choppy because she knew she was going to fail. The tears she’d tried to hold back ran down her cheeks anyway and she sniffled. She sensed more than felt him move behind her.
“What’s my job as a Dominant?” he asked, the heat from his breath on the nape of her neck sending shivers down her spine. “Tell me.”
“To ensure my needs are met, Sir.”
“Do you need to dance?”
“Yes.”
“Why can’t you?”
The answer came to her so quickly, she couldn’t believe she hadn’t realized it before. “I’ve lost my song, Sir.”
The pain of that admission pierced her heart and she inhaled deeply, as if forcing air into her lungs would lessen the realization. More tears swelled behind her eyes, because she somehow knew he’d understand.
He oh-so-tenderly ran his hands down her arms and entwined their fingers. “Let me help you find it.”
He stretched their arms out and then wrapped them around her. She felt his strength pour into her and for the first time in too many months, her feet moved in a pattern of ballet steps she’d known forever and so well, she could recite them in her sleep. But it’d been months since her body had answered the call of dance, until today.
Lennox kept her hands firmly clutched in his, even as he let her feet move. Little by little, her confidence grew and she twirled in his arms. Even then, he only let go of her for a second before she was safe and protected, back in his embrace.
He continued to hold her while her feet grew accustomed to the once-familiar feeling of her beloved ballet. How he kept up with her, she wasn’t sure, but he was always there, ready to hold her or her hands, and to whisper that she was strong and beautiful.
“Keep your eyes closed,” he commanded after some time. “And dance for me.”
She felt a brief moment of panic as he let go of her and stepped away, but she focused on keeping her feet moving. They knew what to do, she didn’t even have to think about it. The slight soreness in her right ankle barely registered with her.
Eyes closed, and no longer holding onto Lennox, she allowed the music to infuse her body. It was almost like being in subspace, she realized. She could shut her mind down, and instead of giving control to a Dom, she yielded to the power of the music. Yet even so, she knew that in reality she was yielding to Lennox, because he held power over the music.
The most overwhelming sense of freedom swept over her and she felt as light as a feather. As she danced, the burdens of the last few months slipped away, soon followed by the weight of the last few years. She was free. Finally free. Before she knew it, she was laughing as she danced.
The song continued, coming to its inevitable end. The last few notes played out, drifting through the air. By the time silence filled the room once more, she was kneeling on the floor, breathing heavily.
She’d done it! She’d danced!
The tears that came this time were tears of joy. She hadn’t realized how empty she’d been without dance in her life. Now that she had it back, she was overwhelmed by peace and happiness. It was as if the joy inside her was too much to contain and it had to spill out some way.
Lennox was behind her almost immediately, pulling her into his embrace. She sighed as his arms came around her. Being in his arms, sated and exhausted by the emotional intensity of what she’d done, this was heaven. And she didn’t ever want to leave.
She nestled deeper into his arms. “I love you.”
The words were out before she could even think about them. They came so easily this time. He tightened his arms around her.
“I’ll never get tired of hearing those words.” He kissed her cheek and helped her to stand. “Come to bed.”
“Bed?” She didn’t understand. What about the toy bag? What about his plans?
He gently turned her so she faced him. His eyes were wet, too. “I do
n’t think there’s anything we can do tonight that will mean more or touch me the way watching you find your song and love of dance again did.” He gave her a tentative smile. “I need time to process it and recuperate.”
She yawned and he chuckled. “You may have a point,” she admitted sheepishly.
He climbed into bed first and held the sheet up so she could join him. His arms were warm and though she’d slept in them once before, tonight they felt like a safe haven in a new way.