Ryan smiles softly, moving his chair closer to me and taking my hand in his. “It’s because you have the biggest damn heart,” he says, bringing my knuckles up to his lips. “And you’re an amazing mom.”
“He makes it easy,” I joke. “The real test will be when he’s a hormonal teenager, fighting us tooth and nail to be his own person. Sneaking out of the house to meet with his girlfriend or to go to parties…”
Ryan chuckles. “Is that what you were doing as a teenager?”
“Well, duh… weren’t you?”
He shakes his head. “I was in JROTC and spent my weekends at drill or robotic competitions.”
“You dated, though, right?” We haven’t touched on our past. I know he was married, even met her a couple times, but I don’t know much about him before our time at the beach house, except that he was overseas more than he was on U.S. soil.
“Laura and I hung out, but we were just friends. We met in science and sort of hit it off. I wasn’t much of a talker, so I didn’t really make friends easily, and she kind of attached herself to me. She didn’t mind that I was quiet. She just liked not being so alone.” His lips tilt into a shy smile.
“You talk to me.”
“Yeah, but I wasn’t outgoing. I wasn’t looking to party or get drunk. I loved MMA, which is why your dad and I are close. I would hang out there after school, or with Laura. I got by in school, but I knew from the moment I joined JROTC, I wanted to join the military. When I was in that class, I felt a sense of belonging. I excelled at it. I joined Raiders and the drill team, and it kept me busy.”
He entwines our fingers together, and my heart pumps quicker. I love when he touches me. “What about you? Book nerd or cheerleader?”
“Why does it have to be one or the other?”
“So, what, you were both?” He quirks a single brow.
“I was a straight-A student… and a cheerleader.”
“Ahh.” He nods, smirking. “So, you were smart and sexy in high school. I bet you were named homecoming queen, weren’t you?” He chuckles, but when I divert my eyes, his laughter rises. “You were, weren’t you?”
“Ian was a football player—the quarterback—and homecoming king.” I roll my eyes, feeling kind of embarrassed. “Kind of cliché, I guess.” Ryan spent his high school years preparing to join the military, to make our country better. I spent it shaking my pom-poms and sneaking out to hang out with my football star boyfriend.
“Hey,” he says, tucking a piece of stray hair behind my ear. “It’s not cliché.” He leans forward and presses his lips to mine. “I hope our son has your brains and personality. I hope he has plenty of friends and is involved in school like you were.”
My heart stutters in my chest at his praise. “I hope he’s protective and strong like you.”
“You’re strong too,” he says. “The way you moved forward after Ian died. That takes strength.”
“Well, you’re smart too,” I volley, making him smile. “Not anyone can get a degree in mechanical engineering.”
“No matter who he is, or what he does, we’ll be there for him… supporting him… together. Because, you’re right, he’s a part of both of us.”
I nod in agreement, a lump of guilt forming in my throat. “I really am sorry I didn’t tell you right away that I was pregnant. You could’ve missed out on his birth, his first couple weeks of life, if not months, and it would’ve been my fault.”
“I’ve already forgiven you,” he says, curling his fingers in the back of my hair and bringing my face toward his. “It was a weird situation and you made the decision you felt was best at the time. In the end, it all worked out.”
The waitress steps up to our table, setting our plates in front of us. After asking if we need anything else, she disappears. We eat our meal while making light conversation, including making plans to go to the beach house soon. When the food is gone, the waitress clears our plates and asks if we would like dessert. Before I can answer, Ryan orders us a chocolate cake to share.
“While we wait, I have something I would like to ask you,” he says.
When I give him my full attention, I notice he looks kind of… nervous. I’m about to ask him what’s wrong, when he slides off his chair and gets down on one knee.
“I might’ve been drunk last night when I asked you to marry me, but I wasn’t when I bought this ring,” he says, pulling a small, black box out of his jacket pocket. “I bought it shortly after you gave birth to RJ, but I’ve been waiting for the right time to ask. Obviously, last night, after I’d been drinking wasn’t the right time.” One side of his mouth tips into a boyish grin.