I sit upright. “Wait a minute. How much more money are we talking?”
“I-I don’t know. A few thousand? Maybe more?”
“What are these debts? Why didn’t I hear anything about this in our initial pitch meeting?” I stare at her.
She turns her face away, unable to meet my gaze. “I was embarrassed. I thought I could get out of this hole on my own; but the money that’s come in so far hasn’t been able to cover it.”
“Hang on.” I glance from her to the bathroom and back. “Did you… wait until we’d just had sex to ask me for money?” I can’t help it. Memories claw at me.
That was always Sheryl’s favorite tactic. Any time I didn’t agree with a financial decision she made, she’d ply me with sex. Wait until I was half-asleep afterward and then ambush me with the least sexy pillow talk imaginable.
I don’t want to believe Cassidy would do the same, but…
Beside me, she sits bolt upright in her chair and whips around to face me, her jaw dropping. “Is that what you think of me?”
“Well, did you?” I raise an eyebrow. “We’ve been in contact about finances for weeks. Why not ask me about this sooner?”
“I can’t believe you think I’d try to get money from you in exchange for sex.” Cassidy shoves to her feet now. “Do you think I’m some kind of gold-digger?”
“I didn’t…” I grit my teeth and shut my eyes. “Cassidy, wait. I’m sorry I leapt to a conclusion. But this is all really strange, you have to admit that.”
But she’s already shaking her head. “I thought I could trust you. I thought we could be honest with each other. But I guess we can’t.” With that, she grabs her purse and storms toward the exit from the rooftop.
I leap up to follow her, but she’s moving too fast. Already halfway across the roof before I even find my shoes. Watching her walk into the women’s changing room, without a backward glance, I give up. I sink back onto the edge of my chair and rest my forehead in my hands.
Is she just using me? Or did I just shatter the tentative peace between us for nothing?
28
Cassidy
This is just like Norman. How could I have thought things would be any different? I stare at my reflection in the mirror of the changing room. Tears streak down my cheeks, and my eyes are red and puffy from crying. I don’t know how long I’ve been standing in here, afraid that if I go back out, Lark will have followed me, or be looking for me by the elevators.
I wrap my arms around my waist, shivering. How could he think I’m a gold digger?
But then… I did ask him for money. Out of the blue. Without explaining myself. Fuck. I lean my forehead against the mirror for support, shivering.
On my phone are a string of texts from my mother. Need to go to the hospital, read the first one. A long series below it. I don’t have health insurance. I don’t know what I’ll do if this operation costs more than I can afford. Did you know hospital overnight stays alone can costs tens of thousands of dollars??
I exhale and watch my breath fog the mirror. I don’t want to doubt my mother’s words. This would be an insane thing to make up, even for her. But I can’t shake my own doubts. I can’t stop remembering all the other times she’s lied to me to get money for other stuff. Frivolous spending, or gambling in Vegas, or weekends away with boy toys drinking herself blind.
If she’s in the hospital, I want to be there for her. Help her. I don’t want her to worry about money. But what if she’s lying again? And what if I just ruined everything I could have had with Lark by believing her?
He still shouldn’t have accused me like that.
I shouldn’t be allocating company funds to a private issue, either. I chew on my lower lip. Shit. Am I the one in the wrong here?
And then I ran away from him when he asked me to talk about it. Again. No wonder he thinks I’m just using him. If I can’t even open up enough to have a real conversation about something serious…
I think about Norman again. I tried to open up to him in the beginning, but he just always shut me down. I learned to keep my feelings to myself. I learned that anything upsetting, anything he might not like, should be hidden, not discussed.
Am I going to let Norman steal Lark from me to? Am I going to let the past define my future?
I wipe at my cheeks, then bend to splash some water on my face. He’s probably long gone already. But on the off chance that he’s not…