She sat up on the bed and combed her hair with her fingers, trying to wrestle it into place as I looked down at her. Her gaze drifted to my knuckles. “Preston, you’re bleeding…”
“It’s over,” I said, trying to push the words out past the lump in my throat. I could feel everything inside of me screaming not to do this, to find some way to fuck Jane and my father over.
But there wasn’t a way that didn’t put Maddy directly in the line of fire. My father had connections, and with an almost laughably small amount of his fortune, he could make the rest of her life a living hell. I couldn’t do that to her. She didn’t deserve it. I couldn’t let her go down with the ship because of me.
“You quit?” she asked, a glimmer of hope flaring in her eyes. She smiled. “That’s… that’s great! I mean, we’ll have to figure a few things out now, but it’s what you wanted, right?”
I shook my head at her. She wasn’t getting it. I had to leave no doubt in her mind as to what would happen next. “No. I didn’t quit. It’s over. We’re over.”
Maddy stared at me for what seemed like an eternity. With every moment that passed, a new expression washed over her face. First there was dumb shock, then confusion, followed by a snort of denial, and then her lips quivered. That last one didn’t leave her, and I could see her emerald eyes filling with tears.
“You can’t be serious,” she whispered. I rubbed my face with my hands, trying to hide my own tears.
“You’re so stupid,” I said, turning my sob of despair into a rueful laugh. “You’re so fucking stupid, Maddy. Don’t you get it? This whole thing has been one big laugh at your expense! I mean really, how pathetic does a girl have to be to fuck her stepbrother?”
When I lowered my hands, Maddy was still looking at me. I wished she wouldn’t. It only made things that much harder.
“Why are you saying this?” she demanded, her voice cracking. “Why are you being so cruel to me?!”
“Because you deserve it!” I roared. I tried to imagine Jane’s face instead of hers and felt my neck and face turn red with anger. “Because you’re fucked up and desperate and everybody knows it but you! My father and your mother—they bet me a sad, pitiful girl like you would do anything to resolve her daddy issues. I didn’t believe them, but look at you. I did it. I won!”
Maddy launched herself up from the bed and crossed the room to me. Tears streamed down her face and she shook like a flower in a storm as she cupped my face in her delicate hands.
“Stop it, Preston. I don’t believe you. You wouldn’t do this to me. Not after everything…”
I seized her wrists and she gasped. I knew I was hurting her, but I had to or she’d never believe me.
“You stupid girl,” I whispered. I managed a sneer, though the disgust I spat was aimed at me and not at her. “You filthy slut. You’d do anything to have a man tell you you’re not worthless, wouldn’t you? You’re just like your mother—”
Finally, something inside Maddy snapped. She slapped me so hard across my face I tasted blood in my mouth. Stars burst in front of my eyes and I held my breath, staring at the wall as she panted in front of me. At least now I had an excuse not to look at her.
“You’re a monster,” she said hoarsely. My soul fractured. In every word, I could feel her beautiful, perfect heart was breaking. “You’re a fucking monster. I hope you rot in hell.”
As she grabbed her clothes and hurried from my room, I realized she’d never know that I already was.
It had been two weeks since I’d last seen him.
The agony had faded into a comfortable numbness that, at the very least, prevented me from crying all night. In fact, sleep came now more than ever. I found myself spending a lot of time unconscious, and for that I was never more grateful.
Every moment I spent in slumber was a moment I didn’t have to think about Preston Harvey and how he’d ruined my life. And when the dreams came—the ones where we were still together, where his lips crashed against mine so fiercely they stole my breath away—a bit of wine was all that was needed to chase them away again.
He’d tried to call me more than a few times since that morning in his room when he’d finally admitted he was the same soulless beast his father was. He’d texted, too, but I never read them. After the first three days I changed my number, and after that, he only made one other effort to contact me. He sent me an envelope in the mail with a check inside of me for one hundred thousand dollars.
I didn’t want to cash it. I wanted to pretend like I’d never need anything from Preston, or my family in general, ever again. But now that I was out of a job, the sad truth was that I’d have to find a new one, and in the meantime I needed a buffer to keep a roof over my head.
When I handed the check over to the teller, I secretly wondered how much of his winnings from my family’s sick little betting pool this constituted. I’d become so filled with rage that I’d nearly snapped the pen in half when she’d asked me to sign the back of it. I didn’t think that particular thought again.
What good would it do, anyway? It was over and done with. I couldn’t go back in time and fix it now. And in a way, Preston had freed me. I’d never trust my family again, and because of his confession, I had finally cut ties with my toxic mother. It was a step forward of some kind, anyway.
I spent my days distracting myself by updating my resume, my LinkedIn profile, and a number of other job-related things, anything that would take my mind off of my past and point my thoughts toward the future, one that didn’t involve getting used and discarded ever again.
I would even date, as soon as I could get around to it. I wouldn’t let Preston Harvey put me off men. I wouldn’t let what he’d done to me turn me angry and bitter. I wasn’t about to become my mother, although now I could understand just a little bit better what had led to her downfall as a human being.
It didn’t make it right, but at least she wasn’t such a mystery to me anymore.
Just as I was beginning to run out of things to do, I got the call that would change my life forever. It was a call I hadn’t been expecting, one from a very prestigious law firm looking for a new legal secretary to manage their office.
“Can you come downtown for an interview around three?” the appointment-setter asked.
I glanced at the clock. It was nearly noon. Fuck it—I’d make it. “Yes,” I said. “I’ll see you then.”
The first thing I did, after getting dressed, was ride the bus for the very last time. It took me to a Volvo dealership where I bought my first brand new car. It was a splurge, but it was a well-deserved splurge, and one that would ensure I was self-sufficient from now on. No more relying on public transport to get me to my new job in a swanky office building downtown. I was a new woman. This Madison Hearst didn’t depend on anyone but herself.
Once I had my new car, my resume, and my interview clothes in order, I drove downtown and sat through the mid-day traffic while waiting for the turn lane into the parking garage to open up. I had no idea what the problem was.
At first I thought there might have been an accident, but as I got closer to the source of the jam, I saw that a parade of news vehicles were blocking the intersection as they tried to find parking spaces directly in front of the Harvey Tower. I shook my head and rolled my eyes. It figured that they’d throw one more wrench into the gears of my life before they were done with me.
Briefly, I wondered what the hell the fuss was about. But it was probably just some stupid PR move Preston or his father had coordinated. Maybe they hadn’t kicked any puppies this week. That seemed newsworthy, all things considered.
Maybe it was something about the wedding. That was only days out now. I couldn’t think of why Mr. Harvey would do something like that at the tower, though. Maybe my mother had put him up to it.
I finally made it to the garage and parked, stuffing my printed-out garage pass between the dashboard and windshield as I stepped out in the warm summer air. I felt good today. I felt capable and vibrant. Preston obviously had done me the courtesy of not blacklisting me, which meant that I now had a rather impressive resume at my disposal. Thank God for small favors, I supposed.