She’s right, but I can’t bear to admit that I wouldn’t be able to keep her from him if it were his desire to have her.
“Leith and Lorna were seeing each other one-on-one without Sin. They were growing close, starting a real relationship, but all of that ended when Sin pulled Lorna into the stockroom at Duncan’s one day. Leith walked in on them having sex and assumed that she’d been seeing Sin one-on-one behind his back.”
I bet that stung. “I can see why he would have been done with her at that point.”
“Certainly. You can’t blame Leith for being hurt, but Lorna didn’t choose to have a one-on-one with Sin. She felt like she couldn’t refuse her leader.”
“This makes me think differently of Sinclair.” He sounds like a real bastard.
“Sin didn’t know that Lorna wanted the gangbanging to stop but was too afraid to refuse him. And he didn’t know that Lorna and Leith were in love.”
“He never found out his best mate loved the girl they were fucking?”
“He eventually found out and tried to make things right by bringing Leith and Lorna back together, but it backfired in the worst way.” Westlyn grimaces. “Lorna overheard Leith saying terrible things about her. Of course, he was lashing out and didn’t mean any of the things he said, but it was too late. She heard him. And she can neither forgive nor forget. His words haunt her day and night.”
“I think it’s safe to say that those two should probably move on.”
“But they can’t because they’re in love.”
He can’t forget what she did, and she can’t forget what he said. “Sometimes pain that cuts that deep can’t be healed.”
“You sound like you know something about that?”
I hear what I think is jealousy in Westlyn’s voice. “Not me. I’ve never been in love. It was my best mate from The Syndicate who went through a painful situation with a woman he loved.”
I didn’t comprehend his pain because I’d never been in love, but I’m beginning to understand his devastation.
I’m beginning to know what love feels like.
Westlyn stands in the bathroom doorway looking at me, saying nothing. “What is it?”
She frowns. “I just got my period.”
“Oh.” I hope she doesn’t feel like we’ve failed. “It wasn’t possible for you to get pregnant then. You would have ovulated before the first time we had sex since you’re getting your period today.”
Her head tilts. “It’s so weird that you know that. I’m a woman, and I don’t even know that kind of stuff about my own body. How did you get so educated on conceiving a baby?”
I guess that kind of information does sound odd coming from me. “It’s my duty to get you pregnant. My father taught me conception 101 before I claimed you.”
“You don’t seem disappointed that I’m not pregnant.”
“I’ll get to stay balls deep inside you in a couple of weeks when you are ovulating. Nothing disappointing about that, doll.” That brings a smile to her beautiful face.
“I guess the upside to not being pregnant is that you get to keep trying.”
“That’s a very good way of looking at it.” I hold out my arms for her to come to me, and I pull her onto my lap once she’s within arm’s reach. “I’m going to wrinkle your suit before you even get to work.”
“Don’t care.” I wrap my arms around her and squeeze. “What time are you meeting everyone at the bridal shop?”
“Ten o’clock.”
“Should be an interesting day for the bridal shop employees. Three brides. Three appointments. You’re all getting married over a three-week period, and you’re all related in one way or another.”
“I hope none of us fall in love with the same dress. That would be a tragedy.”
“I see Shaw going for a dress that makes her look like a princess. One with the big skirt on the bottom.”
“That’s a ball gown. Not my style and I don’t think it would be Ellison’s either.”
Good. I’m not a fan of those kinds of dresses. “Don’t choose anything too sexy or revealing. I don’t want to have to kill anyone for having impure thoughts about my wife.”
“But I want to look good for you.”
“And you will. You’ll be beautiful in whatever dress you choose, but I’d like it to cover your body. I don’t want you to walk down the aisle with your tits bulging out of the top or the dress to be so tight that it shows the brothers every curve you have. Those are for my eyes only.”
“I’ll choose a dress that makes you proud to take me as your wife.”
I bring her hand to my mouth and kiss it. “Thank you.”
“I’m not looking forward to the exchange that could happen between Ellison and my mother. I hope Mum doesn’t act like a total bitch.”
Westlyn is heartbroken because her mother renounced her brother over his marrying Ellison. And I don’t like to see my mate hurting.
“Do you think she can control herself enough to not act like a bitch?” Because from what I’ve seen of Torrie Breckenridge, she couldn’t stop if she tried. She is what she is, through and through.
“I’m not sure, and I’m terrified that she’s going to ruin this appointment for Ellison.”
“Ellison is marrying your brother and is therefore an extension of our family. Don’t be surprised if my mum takes a stand against Ellison being mistreated.” Torrie had better mind her behavior. My mum won’t hesitate to put her in her place.
“Isobel was already going to be there to support Shaw because she’s marrying Mitch, but Bleu has asked her to also serve as Ellison’s mother figure since their mother is dead. If Mum misbehaves, Isobel won’t hesitate to slap her silly. And probably enjoy it.”
“I like Isobel. I feel I owe her a debt for setting me straight about you.” When I left that first treaty meeting, I was planning to force-claim Westlyn when I returned to the compound. Had zero idea that I would have been raping a virgin. I was so angry because I believed her to be a whore and would have no doubt been rough with her. I could have unknowingly injured her. All of that makes me cringe inside when I think about it now.
“She changed my mind about you as well.”
I’m still wondering what might have happened between Isobel and my father. “I think Dad may have had some kind of relationship with your aunt.”
“What do you mean?”
“They knew each other before they married. He looked like he’d seen a ghost when he saw Isobel at the meeting with The Fellowship council. He wouldn’t stop looking at her.” It made me feel weird seeing him stare at her, like it was a transgression against Mum. “And then when she got into the car with us, they both said that it was good to see each other again. And he called her Issy. I can’t imagine a casual acquaintance calling her by that name.”
“Isobel always hated Thane. She was in love with someone else when she was forced to marry him. She always blamed Thane for causing her to lose the love of her life. I wonder if that man was Lennox.”
“I think it could be. And that could make for an awkward situation at the bridal shop if my mother knows they had a relationship.” I think my mum and dad tell each other everything, so I’m certain she would know.
“If they did, it was over a long time ago. And we know that your father has been loyal to your mum. I think it’ll be fine.”
“I agree. My mum has been married to my dad for twenty-nine years, and they have five children together. She isn’t going to be upset over a fling that might have happened before they married.”
“Have you had any flings that I should know about? Any relationships that were more than just sex?”
“No.”
“You’ve never loved a woman?”
“Never.” But I think I may be beginning to.
It’s done. Ellison and Jamie are man and wife. I’m thrilled for them… but disheartened for myself.
I will marry Kieran Hendry a week from today, but I won’t see adoration in his eyes as
I walk down the aisle. His face won’t alight with pure love and reverence as he makes me his wife.
And that’s what I want. His love.
I’ve fallen for the man who claimed me as his own. My mate. My husband. What a fortunate circumstance that should be, but it’s not. Not when my love is unrequited.
I’m staring out the window, watching the streetlights zoom by, when Kieran reaches for my hand. “What’s wrong, doll?”
“Nothing.”
“We don’t lie to each other.”
How do I tell Kieran the truth? That I love him and want his love in return when I’m not even sure that he’s the loving kind.
“Tell me what’s bothering you.”
“Seeing Ellison and Jamie together tonight made me see what I won’t have on my wedding day.”
“Tell me what it is, and I’ll get it for you.”