"It's the gown." She cleared her throat as she lifted her eyes to his. "I want you to know that I'll pay you back, Joe. Once I have a job-"
Joe clasped her shoulders and drew her into his arms. Her body was stiff and unyielding, but he heard her little catch of breath as he gathered her against him, felt the swift kick of her heart against his.
Mine, he thought fiercely, and something primal and male burned its way through his blood.
"You have a job," he said. He cupped the back of her head and tilted her face to his. Her hair, like silken rain, tumbled over his hands. "You're my fiancée. The woman I love, and need, and want."
Lucy's eyes searched his. "For tonight," she whispered.
A muscled knotted in Joe's cheek. "For tonight," he said, and then he bent his head and kissed her until she was clinging to him, and trembling in his arms.
CHAPTER TEN
THE evening was rapidly turning into a disaster.
Under other circumstances, Lucy knew it would have been fun. Susannah Madison Romano, who'd already been the editor in chief of a major magazine and was now in charge of a new one, was the sort of woman she'd always admired.
Susannah was beautiful, and fashionable, and she could hold her own in any discussion. And yet, for all of that, she was feminine and sweet. And her husband adored her.
He adored his brother, Joe, too. Lucy was certain Matthew would have slugged anybody who'd dare to describe his feelings that way, but the love between the two men was obvious and heartwarming.
That very love for Joe made Matthew suspicious of her. She could see it in his smile, hear it in his voice, and who could blame him? She'd come from out of nowhere, as far as he was concerned. There were times, as the evening stretched on, she found herself wanting to turn to him and say, "Look, it's okay, this isn't real. I'm not your brother's fiancée, I'm not even anyone he cares about..."
But that would only make things be worse, because then the lie she and Joe were living would be in the open. And the ugliness of it would be more than she could bear.
Joe had been right about that, at least. There was no reason to involve anyone else in what they were doing.
So she smiled reassuringly each time she caught Matthew looking at her. She laughed at his funny stories, even though she didn't actually hear them. But it was simple enough to take her cue from Susannah and from Joe. When they smiled, she smiled. When they laughed, she laughed...
And wondered who she despised more, herself or Joe.
They were living a lie, a lie made worse by the kiss Joe had forced on her before they'd left his house.
Except, he hadn't forced it on her. She'd wanted his mouth on hers. His hands on her skin. His breath, mingling with her breath. She'd wanted it, wanted him ... and what could be uglier than that, because Joe had kissed her for one reason, and only one reason.
He'd done it to make her look like a woman who'd been loved. A woman who was in love ...
She wasn't. Of course, she wasn't. She was a woman in lust, to borrow Matthew's phrase. And Joe, damn him, knew it.
He hadn't said it, but saying it wasn't necessary when his every action showed it. They were in a public place-a yacht club overlooking San Francisco Bay-and he hadn't touched her improperly, or said much of anything to her. He certainly hadn't kissed her again.
He didn't have to. She was painfully, agonizingly aware of him, seated beside her. She tried not to think about him, or about the kiss. Concentrate on your surroundings, she told herself. On the club.
It was a beautiful place. Teakwood floors. Glittering chandeliers. Lovely women and handsome men ...
But none as handsome as Joe. None as virile, as rugged, as out and out gorgeously male.
"...sail, Lucy?"
She blinked, looked up. Matthew was smiling across the table at her, his eyes still cool and questioning.
"I'm sorry, Matthew. What did you say?"
"I said, do you sail?"
She nodded. "A little."
"Ah. A lady who can tell a line from a rope," he said, and smiled again, but she knew the simple words were a test.
"Definitely. Some old salts might toss you overboard if you call a line a rope," she said lightly, and smiled back at him.
"So, where did you learn to sail?"
"Back home. On Cape Cod."
"You're from New England?"
She nodded. "Boston."
"Well, that's interesting." Matthew took his wife's hand in his. "Susannah's from that part of the country, too."
"Really," Lucy said politely.
"You two might know some of the same people."
"It's possible."
"Suze?" Matthew said, and looked at his wife.
"New England's a big place," Joe said abruptly. "I doubt if Susannah and Lucy moved in the same circles." He looked at Lucy. "Isn't that right, honey?"
She knew exactly what he meant. Susannah would hardly be likely to know anyone who was friends with a woman who took off her clothes for a living.
Lucy's throat tightened. She wanted to tell him that no matter what he thought, she wasn't that kind of woman, that she'd damned near been raised in clubs as elegant as this one, but what was the point? Let Joe Romano believe what he liked. It wouldn't matter, after tonight. No matter what he said, or did, she was finished with this charade. Tomorrow morning, bright and early, she was leaving him.
She had enough money to get her to the bus station. Once she was there, she'd buy a ticket with whatever she had left. A ticket to anyplace...
"Lucy?"
She blinked. Susannah was looking at her, a gentle smile on her face and a worried look in her eyes.
"Lucy, are you all right?"
"Fine," Lucy said brightly. "I was just-I was thinking about what Joe said and I'm afraid he's probably right. I doubt if we moved in the same circles."
"Well, we can talk about it another time. Over coffee, some afternoon, so we can get to know one another, hmm?"
"Fine," Lucy said again, and hated herself for yet one more lie.
But no lie was as agonizing as the one she kept telling herself, that she hated Joe. That she didn't feel anything for him. That he wasn't the most wonderful man she'd ever met ...
She shot to her feet. Three startled faces looked up at her.
"I-I'm just going to the ladies' room."
Susannah rose, too. "Great idea," she said briskly.
"Women." Matthew grumbled as he and Joe pushed back their chairs. "The only creatures on the face of the planet who go to the bathroom in packs."
"We do it so we can talk about you," Susannah said fondly. But they didn't talk about the men. They didn't talk about anything, not until they were both washing their hands at the marble sinks.
"This must be hard for you," Susannah said softly. "Pretending, I mean."
Lucy looked up and met her eyes in the mirror. "I don't know what you're ta
lking about."
"I'm talking about you, making believe you're having a good time, despite my husband's none-too-subtle interrogation techniques." She smiled as she dried her hands on a towel. "Forgive him, won't you? Matthew loves Joe a lot. He's just surprised everything's happened so quickly, that's all."
Lucy saw the color rise in her cheeks. She looked away from the mirror and reached for a towel.
"There's nothing to forgive."
"It's good of you to say that, Lucy. They're just, well, very protective of each other. I suppose it has something to do with the fact that their mother died when they were only kids."
"Did she?"
"Yes. Didn't Joe tell you?"
Lucy shrugged her shoulders. "We haven't had much of a chance to talk about the past."
"Ah." Susannah smiled. "Of course not. You two fell in love so fast. But you have years ahead of you, to learn all about each other."
"Years," Lucy said brightly, and burst into tears.
"Oh, Lucy!" Horrified, Susannah rushed towards Lucy and threw an arm around her shoulders. "Lucy, what is it? What did I say?"
"Nothing. You didn't say ... It's just that-that things aren't the way they seem. Joe and I-Joe and I are-"
"Joe's crazy about you."
Lucy looked up, laughed, and reached for a tissue from a box on the marble sink.
"He's not."
"He is. I can see it, each time he looks at you."
"Susannah-"
"And you're crazy about him."
"I'm not." Lucy blew her nose, then tossed the tissue into the basket. "I'm not crazy about him at all. Look, I can't explain, but we aren't-I mean, things between us aren't-"
"You're nuts about my brother-in-law," Susannah said softly.
The women's eyes met in the mirror again, and Lucy knew she was fresh out of lies.
"If I am," she said, her voice trembling, "I'm going to regret it."
She left the ladies' room quickly, before Susannah could respond, and made her way back to the table.
But something had gone wrong there, too. Joe and his brother were silent, not looking at each other. People at the other tables were looking, though, quick little covert glances from behind their wine glasses and champagne flutes.
"Is something wrong?" Susannah finally asked.