She was brilliant. He could do that. Hell, he could have Ink put that shit all over him. It was the fucking truth and always would be. “I like that solution.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead and lay back again, fingers buried in her hair. “But just looking at those photographs isn’t going to cut it, woman. I’m more fucked up than that.”
Her laughter felt warm on his chest. “You are? What else do I have to do?”
“I want you to tell me as well.”
“That’s not difficult, as long as you’re not worried I’ll curse us.”
“Pretty sure demons can’t hear you, babe. You’re too good. They’re ready to pounce on me.” Because he was a fucking asshole and always would be. Demons liked monsters.
Her fingers drifted to just below his belly and began to write letters there. “I have no problem telling you, honey.”
“I’m not done. That’s the most important, but there’s more. I’ll ink it on my skin, but you say it and then you show me.”
Her eyebrow shot up, and once again her gaze jumped to his. “Show you?” she echoed.
“Need more photographs.”
She rolled her eyes. “You already have so many we’re going to have to get you a new phone. I don’t know where you’re going to put them all.”
“I do.” She hadn’t objected, but then he wasn’t kidding. He’d need more. His very large insecurity problem wasn’t just going to go away because she’d committed to him. It would help, but it wasn’t going to disappear.
“Fine. You’ll have your silly photographs.”
“Coming and going, either one of us, you kiss me.”
“I already do that.”
“Yeah, but it should be a requirement.”
“On both sides, then.”
He let the silence stretch out, and she bit him. He laughed and gripped her bottom. He loved her. Plain and simple. She taught him how to play. How to have fun.
“Fine,” he conceded as if reluctant. He would never pass up a chance to kiss Breezy. Never. Her mouth was pure fire. “Waking me up in the mornings—”
“Don’t even go there or you’ll find you won’t be getting any wake-up calls from me.”
“Fortunately for me, I happen to know you love my cock, so I’ll look forward to you demonstrating that.”
“I won’t deny that.” She laid her head on his chest, ear to his heart.
He tunneled his fingers in her hair. “Tell me, baby. Let’s hear your but. What are you most worried about? I’ll try to put you at ease.” He had known all along he would have to circle back around to her worry, but he wanted to have a few minutes of fun with her so she would stay relaxed and mellow.
Breezy didn’t start unnecessary arguments. He had always appreciated that in her. She didn’t sweat the small stuff. She didn’t care if he had a beer with his brothers, she wasn’t that kind of woman. Before, when she was his, she popped the tops of the bottles and got cold ones for them. He had no reason to think she’d be any different now.
She tensed in spite of everything they’d just shared. He felt the change in her immediately. Panic set in. Her breath exploded out, hot against his chest. “I won’t ever whore for the club. I won’t make drug deals. I won’t help run guns. None of it. Not one thing.”
It was so unexpected, and he actually yanked her head up by her hair. “What the fuck, Breezy? How can you even say that after what we just did? After what I just admitted to you?” The idea of another man touching his woman brought the monster in him far too close.
Her tongue touched her lip nervously. Her eyes went liquid. Steele forced air through his lungs to quiet the fierce need to shake her. She was very, very upset. He had to think beyond his feelings and what it cost him to make the admissions he had and really examine her fears. They were legitimate, just not with his club. Breezy had her own insecurities, and they were as legitimate as his. She came from a similar background and she’d been just as traumatized. She’d been forced by her father to do every one of the things she feared most.
He slowly loosened his fingers from her hair. “Bree, that’s part of trusting me to take care of you in the club.” He had to reassure her, so she would never worry about it again. “First, we don’t use our women for any reason. We don’t take money for any woman to sleep with anyone. If she’s fucking someone at a party, she’s there of her own free will and doing what feels good. She doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to do. We don’t run drugs, so there’s no need to expect a woman to carry drugs for us. Our old ladies are sacred to us as well as to the entire club. They are always as protected as our families are.”
There were tears in her eyes and he brushed his lips over her lids, tasting the drops. His heart contracted. “Baby.” He whispered it against her lashes. “You should have told me right away that was a fear.” He pulled back to look at her.
“I didn’t because I felt like, after observing your club, the idea was absurd, but I get so scared. I can’t help it. I panic at the thought of actually being in a club.”
“Sweetheart, you should have told me. When a man finds the right woman, he isn’t going to whore her out or make her run drugs for him. He doesn’t beat her. He doesn’t cheat on h
er. He doesn’t let other men do any of those things. When he has children, he protects those children. He doesn’t beat them or make them run drugs. He certainly doesn’t whore out his daughters or his sons. You grew up in a fucked-up club, baby. You’re Torpedo Ink now. We take care of our old ladies and our families. I’ve got to tell you, Bree, most clubs do.”
Steele massaged her scalp, knowing he might have yanked her hair too hard. She hadn’t protested and that pissed him off too. She should have. She was too used to the violence she’d been raised in.
“I get rough with you when we’re having sex, Bree, because I think you like it. If you ever don’t, you tell me immediately. It will stop. What I did just then wasn’t deliberate, I was startled, but I still should have been careful. I’m strong, and you could get hurt if I get careless like that. You don’t put up with shit from me.”
“I knew you didn’t do it on purpose. I wouldn’t put up with it, Steele. I told you, I’m not that girl anymore, and I’m not going back.”
He liked the determination in her voice and he believed her. She might love him, and she was more than willing to give him everything he asked for, but she wasn’t willing to be his doormat or take abuse.
“Anything else we need to put to rest before you’re a little easier about Torpedo Ink?”
“Do you run guns?”
“No.” He wanted to give her whatever she needed to lay her fears to rest, but they were skating close to club business.
“What do you do to bring in money?”
“Ink has a tattoo shop. Alena will have the restaurant. Mechanic and Transporter have the garage. I’m a doctor. We’re putting in shops all over Caspar.” He willed her to accept that. “You know we took money from the Swords and their billionaire president.”
She took a breath and dug her chin back into his chest, her eyes meeting his. “What does the club do to earn money?”
There it was. He either was honest, with those eyes of hers staring into his, or he lied, and she’d know it. “You sure you want to know, baby? Because we’re in a gray area here.”