The laughter that rolled out of her was quiet. Incredulous affection. “Can I tell you something, Emily? If I can call you that?”
She peered at me, terror and hope brimming in her eyes.
“Of course.”
Of course, it was my own terror at what she was gettin’ ready to say that sped through my veins.
“I understand that you feel that way. My brother . . .” She almost rolled her eyes as she looked at me as if I would get it—as if we were thick as thieves—the oldest of friends.
“He’s . . . intense,” she seemed to settle on.
Without my permission, a small laugh pulled from my throat.
“Yeah, just a little bit.”
She crossed her arms and started to pace in her own anxiety. “He takes things to the extreme. He was my hero, you know, growing up?”
She glanced over at me.
I remained silent, not sure what to make of her showing up here. Across the entire country.
“I mean, could you imagine your big brother being the lead singer in a band? So cool, and you wanted to be just like him?” She eyed me with a small smirk. “Well, I guess you can.”
Warmth spread, a blanket of it, one I wanted to return to her and hold her with.
I liked her. Liked her way too much, which only made every second of this harder.
“I’m sure he was somethin’.”
I could only imagine Royce as a teenager. So alive and wild and unruly.
Impassioned by his songs.
Relentless in his commitment.
A devastating force every time he stepped into a room.
“He was gonna be a big deal. Like a huge deal. Everyone knew it, saw his talent. I mean, my father despised him—”
I cringed when she mentioned it, hating that was the kind of home Royce had been raised in.
“So for him to sign Royce’s band, they had to be good. But my father . . . he always judged everything by its dollar value. How much money it was going to make him. So, A Riot of Roses? You could bet they were going to be worth a lot.”
Her smile faltered a little. “Even when he was giving it his all for the band, working nonstop, doing everything it took to make it big? He was still there for me. Took time for me. It wasn’t like either of my parents really gave a crap.”
She sucked her top lip between her teeth, like it was a nervous habit. “Even when he got married, he made sure I knew I was still his girl.”
I tried not to flinch at the picture that invaded my mind.
Still, I was hugging my arms over my chest.
Trying to hold it together. To be okay with this part of Royce’s life when part of me felt like it should have been mine.
“And when he had his daughter—”
I choked, unable to stop the shock, this feeling as if I were being strangled.
The final stake confirming I didn’t know Royce at all.
That he’d never let me in.
My hand darted out to the back of the couch to keep me standing.
“He has a child?”
Maggie’s face twisted in remorse. “I’m sorry. I-I didn’t know he hadn’t told you.” In discomfort, she fiddled with her fingers. “But of course he wouldn’t. He doesn’t talk about it. Ever.”
I forced myself to look at her.
“He was devastated when he lost her, Emily. Absolutely destroyed.”
“How did he lose her?”
Why was I asking this? Torturing myself?
She blew out a shaky sigh, hesitating. She seemed to have to convince herself to continue. “Royce found out that Cory was involved in some bad things with my father. I know I wasn’t supposed to know about it, but I heard the two of them arguing in the office. Royce had said he’d kicked Cory out of the band. My father had demanded that he bring him back. Royce had refused. Said he wouldn’t stand for the band to be involved in anything criminal. Tensions between my father and Royce had been running high. Getting worse and worse.”
She dropped her gaze, paced in agitation, flapping her hands at her sides as if she were trying to shake off the trauma.
“Royce had picked me up that night and told me I was his date for the show. I was so proud, Emily. So proud that I got to stand by him. Just be in his space. I was always his biggest fan. But he had an interview afterward. He’d left me in one of the private rooms backstage. He made me promise not to leave that room until he came back for me.”
A tight sob worked its way free of her throat. My soul wept. Pain leeching out, or maybe it was taking on some of hers.
“There was a knock at the door. I . . . I thought Royce had forgotten something. But it was Cory. I tried to shut the door, Emily. I did. But he was too strong. He forced his way in. He’d locked the door behind him, told me Royce was trying to steal what was most important from him, and it was time my brother learned a lesson.”