I’d tried contacting Elijah a few times, even searching him out, and he’d ignored me. Just like I avoided him, now it was my turn to be treated badly and it fucking hurt. Now, I was on the receiving end, I felt like a fucking idiot. And Elijah wasn’t being subtle about it. At one point in the past few days, I’d been standing right in front of his path, and he walked by me without so much as glancing at me. I had wanted to shout at him in anger, but at the same time, I felt like crying. In the end, I did neither and walked away.
This was day five of Elijah ignoring me, and I decided it was urgent enough to risk facing his irritation. Besides, before we dated, I faced it every time I met him, and I was usually the one to bring it out in the first place.
So this wasn’t new, just falling back into old habits.
“Where the hell can I find him?” I muttered to myself, chewing on my lip in my anxiety.
I’d just come out of class, and I realized for the first time, that I didn’t have much of an idea about Elijah’s schedule. There were times when he would come to pick me at the end of my classes. I didn’t even know which buildings he went to for those classes. Thanks to this, searching him out was frustratingly difficult for me.
Oh, well, I sighed. It shouldn’t matter now. It’s around lunch, so there’s some place I can go to meet him.
I hadn't managed to catch him in any of our shared classes. I didn’t know if he had some form of disguise, or if he was good at hiding. Or maybe my eyesight was bad. I’d gone to look for him in the school cafeteria before, too, but I hadn't managed to see him.
Still, it was lunch, and I was hungry, so if I got there and he wasn’t present than that was my bad luck. Stopping by his dorm didn’t work either, so I hoped we could meet while walking around on campus, but since it wasn’t working out, I was considering…asking Logan for help.
I would rather not have to if I can avoid it.
I no longer had anything personal against Logan. I still didn’t like him, but he and I hardly paid much attention to each other. By that point, he was a package deal with Dana, and I didn’t want to fight with my friend over her boyfriend choices, so I let it go. This, however, didn’t mean he and I were friends. Elijah was his friend, so he might not even help me. But, I was growing desperate enough to try just about anything.
By the time I made it to the cafeteria, I was surprised to see him with Logan and Dana.
Shit. I could have just asked Dana for help, but it was too late to realize it anyway. I hurried over to them, my heart starting to beat fast in my chest.
“Dana, hey,” I said, a little breathless. “Uh, hey, Elijah.”
“I’m right here, too,” Logan said when I didn’t mention his name.
“Right,” I muttered, sparing him a glance. “Elijah, there’s something important I need to talk to you about. Do you think we could...”
“I don’t wanna hear it.”
His words were cold, and they stopped my words in my throat. It was unexpected, coming from Elijah because even before when we argued a lot, he’d never been cold with me. It was enough to get my heart to almost stop for a moment.
“I-it’s important,” I stuttered, my voice growing quieter.
Elijah didn’t bother to say more. He hadn't even looked up from when I approached the table. I bit down on my lip, blinking back the sting in my eyes. After a moment of silence among the four of us, Logan sighed and turned to me with a frown.
“He doesn’t want to talk to you, so leave,” he said, and not even like he was trying to be rude about it.
“I’d appreciate it if you kept out of it,” I muttered. “This is important and something only between the two of us.”
Logan scoffed. “Does it have anything to do with you and that dating site?”
I frowned. “How do you know about that?” I turned to look at Dana, who looked a little guilty. Did she tell him about me and the dating site?
“I’m gonna say this out loud because I’m starting to feel sorry for the both of you. Elijah only hooked up with you after ghosting your computer. Did you think you could find such a close match on a dating site with your interests?”
I opened my mouth, wanting to say something, but my mind had gone blank. In the next minute, I turned to look at Elijah, who’d stiffened in his seat. As I continued to stare at him, he turned his head to look at me.
“Elijah…” I breathed out, begging with my eyes for him to give an explanation that wasn’t t
hat cruel.
Elijah just sighed and faced me properly, the hostility on his face replaced by hesitation. Then, he sighed.
“I’d wanted to find a better time and way to tell you this, but… I’m not your perfect match or anything. You left your computer at once, and I copied your profile. That’s how I knew what you liked. The fact that I liked what you liked…. Well, not necessarily true.”
… Seriously?
After the emotional roller coaster, I’d been putting myself through since our parents showed up, and he told me this now? I could feel my eyes sting again, and I didn’t want to bawl in the middle of the cafeteria.
So, I raised my hand and slapped him across the face.
Elijah didn’t try to guard himself, and the sound was quite clear. The murmuring in the cafeteria lowered a little as others turned to see what was happening.
Feeling like I was about to come apart at the seams, I turned my back to the three of them and hurried out of the cafeteria, forgetting that I was hungry. Just when I’d stepped outside, I felt a hand on my shoulder. My eyes widened, and I for a moment, I was hopeful. But the hand was much smaller than Elijah’s, and when I turned around, it was to see the one that chased after I was Dana.
“Why am I surprised it’s you?” I murmured, sighing as I looked away.
Dana just scoffed at me and got straight to the point. “As nice as that was to see, you tend to fight more with your words than with force, so something is up, right? You’ve been acting a little weird lately, and I wasn’t sure if I should try to help you with Elijah or not, but I got Logan to drag him to the cafeteria…”
I turned my eyes back to her, eyebrows arched. So, it was thanks to her that I was able to meet Elijah at all today, huh?
“Sorry your efforts went to waste,” I said solemnly.
“Forget about that,” she waved dismissively, then frowned at me. “Seriously, Sophia, what’s up?”
I gave her a look, then turned and slowly started walking. I didn’t have a set destination, but I felt like I needed to move, and Dana followed after me. She was good about being patient, not asking directly what I wanted to say, waiting until I could come out with it on my own. After several minutes, I took a deep breath and calmed myself down, saying the words out loud for the first time.