“I’ve been here for…what, three months? Less?” She leaned sideways this time, her shoulder fitting just below his armpit. He slid his arm around her and pulled her in tighter. “Suddenly I own a house with acreage, I have a staff, and I’m apparently filthy rich even though I haven’t seen any money or bank accounts or anything. And, oh yeah, magic is real and I’m supposed to have a crapload of it that I don’t know how to work.” She sighed. “Anyway, after a huge life change, suddenly I have all of this new…stuff that I haven’t a clue how to manage. And I don’t have time to figure it out, because I summoned some magical people who are coming to join this backward, incredibly odd operation. I’m in way over my head, Austin. Way over my head. I tried to tell Mr. Tom, Niamh, and Edgar, but none of them would listen. They think I’ll just miraculously know how to handle everything. I’m socially awkward and their minds are warped—how can we possibly have a chance in hell to make an impression on the magical world? If important people come to meet me or the house, expecting some sophisticated magical master with a well-oiled machine of a crew, and find this lot?” She shook her head. “I can’t even handle those freaking dolls!”
“No one can handle those dolls,” Austin said without meaning to. “No one.”
“I just… Did you ever feel overwhelmed by everything?”
“I was too filled with rage, testosterone, and stupidity to feel overwhelmed when I really should have, and once I smartened up, I hid instead of trying to start over. I slunk into the shadows to lick my wounds and moan about the hand I was dealt. I realize that now. I wasn’t overwhelmed because I settled for less than I should have.” He squeezed her. “Your concern shows your responsibility. The way you always keep trying, despite everything, shows your courage. This house chose well. The more I see, the more I’m convinced of that fact. Don’t underestimate Niamh and the others, either. They might seem like nut cases, but they have a lot of experience under their belts. A lot. They’ll steer you true, and if anyone tries to throw their weight around and they can’t handle it, you have me. Worst case, you have those dolls and this house. You’re protected here, Jess. Trust in that, and allow yourself to learn and grow. You’re only going to get better.”
She nodded, still looking out at the garden. “Thanks. You always know what to say.”
“I have no idea why.”
She smiled at him, and as he looked down into those sunburst eyes, he knew one moment of vertigo. The ground dropped away and the world spun on its axis, up and down, right and left.
A moment later, when she moved away from him, he almost constricted his arm to keep her put. The woman was a beauty with a soft heart and fire in her core. This house had chosen its heir perfectly. This might all be new to her, but she would rise to the occasion easily, he had no doubt.
He just wished this house hadn’t chosen him. That, or maybe he wished he were different. He hadn’t defined himself enough for a woman like her. She was entering midlife like a fallen star hellbent on taking out anything in her path. He’d entered midlife asleep, hoping everything didn’t crumble around him and wake him up.
“What’s the matter?” she asked as she led them out of the room.
“I thought you said you’d learned to cut off your receptors to your team?”
Those receptors were yet another reason Ivy House’s magic felt like a cage. Jess had a magical connection to the people who served the house, something that allowed her to read their feelings. She’d blocked her connection to him to preserve his privacy. She’d then blocked the others so as not to get more insight into their lives, apparently. He didn’t blame her.
Ultimately, though, Jess had control over that—she could reopen the receptors as easily as she’d closed them. He was trusting her to keep her word, a trust he wasn’t used to giving.
“You look like you swallowed a toad,” she said, pointing him toward an exit at the back of the house. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing. Just reflecting on my life choices.”
“Aren’t we all,” she muttered, opening the door and gesturing him out. “Sir.”
He reached above her hand and took hold of the edge of the door. “Ma’am.”
She smiled and scooted out ahead of him.
“Think Gary would’ve held your door open?” he asked with a grin, unable to help it. He’d let Niamh do the teasing about Jess’s terrible pick, mostly because he had never done online dating, and for all he knew, the guy had posted someone else’s picture and lied about his personality. But man, that had been a shitshow from the word go. The second that guy had walked in, Austin had known exactly who he must be, and had been giddy at the thought of how Jess would handle him.