"Why won't you let me go?"
And now I'm playing the coquette even, when before this I've never even thought myself capable of flirting.
"Isn't it enough," the King murmurs, "that I don't want to?"
"I'm not sure," I hear myself cooing. "It depends, I suppose, if that's what you tell the other Alices—-"
"You are the first," he interrupts. "No one has ever won the game except you."
No one?
"You didn't know," he guesses with another smile, and I can't help but smile back.
I'm the first.
The first!
We start to walk, the King still holding my hand as he takes me inside a palatial living room and then out to a hallway where footmen stand guard. They bow deep as soon as we pass them by, and the King asks, "You're not used to it?"
"I'm not a princess in my world," I quip, "so no."
"But you won't be a princess here either."
Wow. Bitch, much?
"Because here, you'll be queen."
I catch the gleam in his obsidian eyes, and a laugh escapes me. "Not funny!" I'm pouting again, believe it or not, and we actually continue flirting until we reach the end of the hallway.
At the king's nod, the pair of footmen standing guard throw the doors open, and inside I find myself in familiar territory.
The tapestries...the giant four poster...I can't be mistaken, can I?
This bedroom is what first showed up on the playing card, and I whirl around in surprise. "This is yours?"
"Yes."
"But..." I shake my head in confusion. "What about the monster?" I ask the question unthinkingly, and with my mind busy trying to recall all the things I glimpsed earlier, I don't notice the way the King whitens at my words.
"I saw it in your bath, and even though it had its back to me, what I saw..." I almost say that the beast frightened me, but then I remember the dormouse, and I can't help shuddering. The beast was an intimidating sight, but the dormouse...
My thoughts are cut short when I feel the King suddenly releasing my hand, and I glance up, intending to ask what's wrong—-
But the words die the moment I see the way he's once again looking at me...
Like I'm his enemy.
And I know that might make it seem like he hates me, but it's not like that.
I'm saying he's looking at me like I can hurt him...like he knows that I will hurt him...and the way he's looking at me now...
I've already hurt him.
And just like that it becomes painfully clear.
"You're the monster," I say unevenly.
The King doesn't answer, but I see the truth in his eyes, and everything just gets more and more painfully clear. The reason why something about him torments and haunts me, the reason why seeing the monster in pain as it transforms makes me cry...
Only when it's too late I realize what my soul has recognized from the very start.
This man is destined to be mine.
Mine.
But instead I've hurt him and called him a monster.
"I'm s-sorry—-"
"You only spoke the truth," the King of Hearts says quietly. "And one must never apologize—-"
"No, it's not like that, please—-" I take a step forward, wanting and needing to hold on to him, but when I see him stiffen, I realize my touch has become unbearable.
"Please." The way he's still looking at me hurts, but what kills me more is knowing that I hurt him first.
"They told me you would be as the prophecy says—-"
They?
"And against my better judgment," he goes on tonelessly, "I allowed myself to take a chance on you. To believe that you, Addie—-"
Hearing it nearly makes me cry. It just hurts and hurts, knowing that the sound of my name on his lips should've felt right. But now it doesn't.
"They made me believe you'd be different."
"I am," I say desperately. "I was just shocked—-"
But it's too late.
No!
I try running after the King, but the moment I leave the ballroom, several footmen are suddenly blocking my way, and I'm left staring helplessly as the King walks farther and farther away.
"Please, Your Majesty..."
But he doesn't ever look back, and the tears slowly fall down my cheeks.
No. No. No.
I lose track of time, and I don't even know how long I've been standing there, tears running down endlessly my cheeks...
"Adalheidis..."
My head jerks up.
The footmen are gone, and the only ones standing before me are the Cheshire Cat and the Hatter.
"I hurt him," I say brokenly, and when the expressions on their handsome faces only remain grim, I realize I'm telling them something they already know.
"The King's mother was an Alice like you," Rayé says quietly. "A human. But unlike you, she was cruel and merciless. She raised the King to believe that people would shun and fear him. She wanted him to hate the whole world and love only her, so that through him..."
"She would be Queen," I whisper.