Because of Malone.
I close my eyes and wait to embrace the rage that lingers in me at all times. It’s still there, still a roiling mess of darkness, but it doesn’t surge the way I expect.
I am so fucking tired.
“Aurora.”
I open my eyes as Malone plucks the wine glass from my hand and moves to the sink. She washes both glasses with quick, efficient movements and then sets them on a small drying rack I hadn’t noticed before now. Malone turns, and it almost seems like she hesitates, though it’s so brief a pause, I’m half sure I imagined it.
I swallow hard. “This is a mistake.”
“Which part?” Her lips curve, but the smile doesn’t reach her eyes. “I’m well aware of the pitfalls. Come along.” She turns and walks out of the kitchen, leaving me to trail after her.
Except she’s not aware of the pitfalls. No matter how formidable she is, she’s not even on the same playing field because the possibility of me actually attacking her doesn’t even register. I don’t know why that bothers me so much. It should be an asset. My end goal is easier if she’s caught unawares.
But somehow I’m opening my mouth, and words spring free. “Do you often invite people into your bed?”
“No. Never.”
That makes me feel even worse. I rub the heel of my hand against my chest. The sequins are little pokes of pain that do nothing to calm me. “Then put me up on the couch.”
Malone pauses in her doorway. Shadows hide her expression from me, but I can tell she’s displeased by the tense line of her shoulders. “Tell me your safe word.”
I stop short. “You are not turning me sleeping beside you into a scene.”
“Aurora, we’ve been in a scene from the moment you arrived here. Tell me your safe word.”
“Thorn.”
She doesn’t move. “Do you want to use it?”
Conflicting desires rise in me, tangling themselves up until I don’t know what I want anymore. Against all reason, my throat goes tight. I am…so incredibly tired. I hang my head. “No, I don’t want to use it.”
She opens her bedroom door and steps back. “Go in and strip. I’ll be there presently.”
The numbness from before spreads, coating my cheeks, sliding down my neck, curling around my heart. I slide past her and pull off my dress. I followed the earlier instructions, so I’m naked beneath it, but I take the time to fold it and set it on the chair next to the stylized desk across from the bed. By the time I finish, Malone has reappeared with my toothbrush and hair wrap in hand.
She passes it over. “Is there anything else you need from the room tonight?”
“No.”
“Get ready.”
I’m almost relieved when she doesn’t follow me into the bathroom. This is strange enough without brushing my teeth next to this woman in a parody of domesticity that can never exist. My numbness doesn’t decrease as I go through the familiar motions of getting ready for bed. I can almost pretend that I’m not about to sleep next to my enemy. Almost.
Right up until I stand in the doorway and stare at her large bed. I’m still coming to terms with the thought of lying next to her, close enough to touch, to kiss, to taste. Close enough to strike.
Then she walks out of the closet without a single piece of clothing on, and it’s everything I can do not to hit my knees right then and there. Malone is magnificent. There’s no other word for it. Her hair is a little less than perfect, sticking up in places like she’s been running her fingers through it, and her body is all lean, strong lines, save for the softness of the curve of her hips, her small breasts each tipped with a rosy-pink nipple.
She stops short, and we stare at each other. She’s seen me naked more times than I can count by virtue of the Underworld, but right now she’s looking at me like this is the first time. Like it means something that I’m standing here without a single physical barrier between us.
It doesn’t.
It can’t.
“You put me in a nightgown before because you keep this place so cold.” It doesn’t feel cold right now. It feels like I’m burning alive.
She barely glances at me. “My bedding and body heat are more than enough to keep you warm tonight.”
“Malone—”
“Bed.” She snaps her fingers and points to the left side, farthest from the door. Her expression is strange, as if she tries to pull on the icy expression but can’t quite manage it.
I hesitate but finally obey. There’s no other option. I’m too tired, too wired, to push her right now. I don’t know what would happen if I did. Better to just submit to this tonight and land on solid ground tomorrow when she replaces the things her demon cat destroyed.