Sean patted his brother because it seemed like something their mom might have done. But Mac jerked away as if it hurt then groaned as if any kind of movement was a problem.
“Mac…I’m scared. What do I do?”
“What I told you. Go to bed.”
“You’re hurt.”
“Go to bed.”
Sean started to cry, and though he did his best to stop, the sniffles won. As his brother’s hand landed on his shoulder, he was ashamed.
“Billy’s wicked scared, right?” Mac said roughly.
“Yeah.”
“So go take care of him. Go on.”
“But you’re—”
“If Dad finds you in here, we’re all in trouble. Go .”
That got Sean moving like nothing else could. He scooted back to his room, back to Billy. Who was indeed wicked scared.
“I d-d-don’t want to l-l-live here anymore,” Billy said.
“I’ll take you away. I’ll take you and Mac away.” Sean lay back down, closed his eyes and thought of Han Solo the hero. Fearless and strong. Protector of the weak. Champion. “I promise, Billy.”
***
Sean sat up in a rush and nearly flipped himself off the couch. He blinked hard and raised his arm to shield his eyes. Light was spilling into the living room, all bright and cheerful, but it registered as glare.
As he thought about the dream, his stomach rolled. In the end, he hadn’t been able to keep that promise to Billy; he hadn’t managed to get his brothers out. Time had been their slow, disinterested savior, their age of majority all that had rescued them. Mac, who’d taken the brunt of the beatings, had been the last to leave, staying until Billy was out then disappearing into the army.
Never to be seen again, really.
Sean couldn’t blame the guy for that. After years of running interference, no wonder Mac had had it with his younger brothers. He’d more than paid his dues. Besides, Sean often wondered whether his brother thought less of him and Billy. Mac had rarely cracked, but Sean and Billy had. Often.
With his older brother on his mind, Sean checked his watch and calculated what time it was on the other side of the globe. Not that it would matter. Mac wouldn’t answer the number he’d left for calling. Never did.
Sean grabbed his BlackBerry, dialed what he’d been given and laid down another message, all no pressure, just-give-me-a-buzz-when-you-can. He figured he’d let one more week go by and then he’d just tell the recording that their father had died.
After he hung up, he showered and made some phone calls to New York to keep his mind off Lizzie. He wanted nothing more than to go down to her place, and not just because he was rattled from his dream. He was worried that they’d had their last night together and the concern wasn’t sitting well.
His instinct was to press her, but that wasn’t fair. Best thing was to give her a little space and pray that she came around. Hell, he wasn’t sure exactly what he wanted out of a relationship with her. It wasn’t as if he had the capacity to fall in love with anyone. But he knew that he wanted to see her again.
Maybe even had to see her again.
Man…he didn’t enjoy feeling like this. Especially as he couldn’t seem to pull himself out of the emotions.
But at least work wasn’t a problem this morning. There was good news on the Condi-Foods deal. The memorandum of understanding from the acquirers had hit his offices at 4:00 a.m. for his review, and the share price and interest payments had been adjusted to what they’d agreed on. Which meant they had the bastards in writing.
As soon as he got back to Manhattan this morning, he was going to double check the documents then meet with the board chair to give his go-ahead. It was going to be big news on the Street, though the leaks were already out there. The news outlets had started calling his office.
Sean got dressed, throwing a polo shirt on under his suit for the trip back because he’d shredded his button-down. He was just about to lock up when he heard the sound of a car engine turning over and wheezing out. There was a pause. Then the starter’s whirring noise went off again only to fade after nothing caught.
He went over to the bay window and looked through the old lace curtains.
In the street down below, Lizzie got out of her Toyota and marched back into the duplex.
Sean descended the stairs at a clip and leaned into the open doorway of her apartment. “You need help?”
Lizzie was holding the phone to her ear and tapping her foot in frustration. Dressed in the loose scrubs of a nurse, her face was clean and shiny, her hair softly curling up as if it were only partially dry from a shower. She was frazzled, her mouth set with frustration, that foot going like the third hand on a watch, but she looked fantastic to him.
She lowered the receiver from her mouth. “My car does this sometimes. Just refuses to wake up.”
“And you’re late?”
“I wanted to get in early for my last day today. Boy, that starter motor has always had perfect timing. Perfectly bad timing.”
“Can I drive you somewhere?”
“No, thanks. I’m on with the cab—” She cleared her throat and spoke into the phone. “Hi, I’d like a pickup at…”
As she talked with the taxi company, Sean stared at her, thinking he was the one who should drive her to work.
“I’m sorry, how long?” she said. “Forty -five minutes?”
“Let me take you,” he cut in.
“I…ah—”
“Lizzie, I’ll take you wherever you need to go. Let me do it.”
Her eyes shifted to him. There was a pause. Then she said into the receiver, “Sorry, yes, I’m still here. But…ah, I don’t need the cab. Thank you.” She hung up. “You look like you’re about to leave, though.”
“I am. Right after I take you to work.”
“I’m going to Roxbury.”
“Then so am I.”
“Okay…thank you. I just need to call the garage.” She was quick and to the point with the mechanics, and after she hung up, she grabbed her purse and keys. “They’re going to send a tow for it. They’re used to me.”
Damn it, he hated that her ride was unreliable. But as he followed her outside, he kept his yap shut. It wasn’t as if she needed to hear that right now because she was no doubt thinking the same thing.
Without saying a word, they both paused on the shallow porch. The sun was a golden yellow, the sky a brilliant robin’s-egg-blue, the trees as green as emeralds. It was as if the world had been colored by children’s crayons.
“Beautiful day,” he said.
“Yes.” She looked around. “Like a cartoon almost. Reminds you of when you were young, doesn’t it? So simple and clear and beautiful.” She made an awkward sound. “Guess that’s silly.”
“Actually, it was just what I was thinking.”
Her eyes shifted over, and for a split second, the connection was there between them again, as invisible as the air that separated them, but as warm and real as the sunshine on their faces.
“Lizzie,” he breathed.
“We…better go.” Except she didn’t look away. And neither did he.
Sean leaned down and put his lips on hers. There was so much he wanted to say, but he kept it simple and clear as the day. “I’m glad I’m taking you to work.”
He took her hand and they walked to the rental in silence. After he opened her door for her, he waited until she was settled, then went around to the driver’s side.
As they headed off for Roxbury, she said, “I wanted to let you to know I’m moving out.”
Sean’s hands cranked down hard on the wheel and he had to force them to relax. “You don’t have to.”
“I want to leave.”
“Why?” Even though he knew.
“Too many memories.” Then she quickly added, “Besides, if I end up working downtown during the day, it would be better if I lived closer to a T-stop.”