***
Lauren stared at the television, her mind a million miles away from her living room. By now she should be in bed. Midnight had come and gone, and before she knew it, her alarm would go off. But even with knowing this, she couldn’t sleep. Both her body and mind fluttered with emotions of every kind. The usual anger and sadness that overcame her whenever she thought of the baby she’d lost weighed down on her, but this time so did guilt. At the time, she’d been angry at Nate, but he’d had a right to know she was pregnant. She justified not telling him because he never contacted her, but she’d been wrong. And what if she hadn’t lost the baby? Would she have told him then? Honestly, she did not know.
And what about now? What did she really want? When they kissed, it took her breath away. Made her feel alive in a way no other man’s kiss ever did. Wrapped in his arms, her mind and body forgot about the past. All it recognized was the man and how he made her feel. But she couldn’t let herself forget the past. When he left, it had nearly killed her. Depression had plagued her for months. She’d almost failed her freshman year of college, in fact. Did she want to open herself up to him again like that? What about Kevin? More guilt pressed down on her as she thought of him. He didn’t set her body on fire like Nate, but they enjoyed each other’s company. He treated her well, and they shared some of the same interests. Kevin was safe, and he didn’t make decisions for her.
“What am I going to do, JoJo?” Lauren asked the dog next to her.
JoJo cracked open her eyes at the sound of her name. Then, after a heavy sigh, the dog readjusted her head and closed her eyes again.
“Thanks for all your help.” Reaching out, she rubbed behind the dog’s ears. She needed someone other than her dog to talk to. In the past, she would have picked up the phone and called Callie regardless of the time. That was the type of friendship they’d had. But not anymore. Sure, she still considered Callie her closest friend, but now she had Dylan in her life. Any phone calls would have to wait until tomorrow. Her sister Kelly was out, too. With the new baby, she needed to rest whenever she could. With no other options Lauren leaned her head back against the couch and closed her eyes. Maybe if she pretended to sleep, her body would get the message and she’d still get about five hours of sleep. Five hours was better than none.
Chapter 7
The ring of her cell phone pulled Lauren from the lesson plans in front of her. She wanted them done before calling it a day and heading home to pack for the weekend with Kevin in New York—something she should be excited about. Unfortunately, since her last run-in with Nate, she wished she’d never invited Kevin along. With her emotions stuck on this darn roller coaster, she needed a weekend away from both men. Maybe with hundreds of miles separating her from both of them, she could get her head on straight. But she’d already asked Kevin, and he had rearranged his schedule so he could join her. After that, there was no way she could cancel on him.
When she picked up the phone, Kevin’s name glared back at her. Right away, hope sprang to life. He never called this early. Was it possible something had come up, and he needed to change their plans? It had happened several times in the past. On those occasions it had annoyed her. If it happened today, she’d do a little jig right there in the middle of her classroom.
“Hi, Kevin.” Lauren tried to infuse some cheer into her voice. “Is everything okay?”
A hacking cough came through the phone. “No,” he said in a raspy voice. Another coughing fit came over him. “I’m sick. The flu.”
Lauren almost didn’t recognize the voice. He sounded as if he’d placed a clothespin over his nose.
“There is no way I can make it this weekend. I went to the doctor this morning and have been in bed ever since. If Olivia hasn’t gone back to California yet she’d love to go with you.”
A crazy mixture of relief and guilt washed over her. The poor guy sounded miserable, and she knew how awful the flu made you feel. She’d had her own run-in with it around Thanksgiving. Yet, thanks to his condition she was getting out of their weekend together.
“I understand. Is there anything I can do for you? Bring you anything?”
“Kill me, maybe,” he moaned, before another cough assaulted her ears. “Every part of my body aches.”
“I know the flu is brutal. Make sure you rest. I spent three days in bed sleeping when I had it.”
“Trust me, unless the house is on fire, I don’t plan on leaving my bed,” Kevin said. “If I feel better, I’ll call you on Sunday. I’ll text you Olivia’s number if you want to try her. Have fun in New York.”
“Thanks. Feel better.”
Lauren stared around her empty classroom. Now that Kevin couldn’t go, she had an extra ticket. Should she ask a friend or give Olivia a call? Her first choice of companions was out. Callie hated the ballet. The only way she’d get her there was by physical force. Kelly was out, too. Not many of her friends enjoyed the ballet, but Kevin’s sister did. Would she enjoy a whole weekend with Olivia? They’d only met that one time. She’d have to think about it, and, worst-case scenario, she would go alone. Just because she had an extra ticket didn’t mean she had to use it.
***
Under three layers of blankets, Kevin shivered again and cursed his bad luck. He could not recall when he’d last been sick. And never like this. Every inch of his body ached, one minute he was hot and the next freezing, and the cough medicine did not even take the edge off. He just wanted to die and end his suffering.
His physical ailments only added to his foul mood. Of all the weekends, it had to happen on this one. While not a huge fan of the ballet—in truth he found it downright boring—he had been looking forward to a getaway with Lauren.
He had postponed his Friday afternoon appointment until the following week just so they could leave when she got out of school. Rarely did he change business meetings for anything or anyone, much less something as trivial as the ballet, but he knew how important this was to Lauren. Not to mention he figured it was a great opportunity to further develop their relationship. Even before she’d asked him, he had been considering a romantic weekend getaway. Especially considering her distant behavior as of late. Although she never called on a regular basis, her phone calls had become even less frequent. When they did talk on the phone, she sounded preoccupied and kept their conversations short. The last time they’d gotten together, she remained stiff and rigid most of the night. Only twice had he glimpsed the woman he’d first met: once when she discussed the ballet with his sister and then when she slipped her hand into his under the table. Of course, he could chalk up her behavior that night to meeting his parents for the first time.
When she’d dropped this weekend in his lap, it had alleviated some of his worry over the change he’d noticed in her. How important could the guy from her past be if she invited him away for the weekend? Not that it mattered now. Thanks to the damn flu, he was stuck in bed, his hopes of pushing their relationship closer to an engagement put on hold.
Although, maybe it didn’t need any further encouragement. If Lauren wasn’t fully invested in them, would she have asked him? She could have just as easily invited along a friend like Callie. She hadn’t, though. She’d asked him, and she’d sounded genuinely disappointed when he’d just talked to her.
Despite the drummer in his head using his brain to compose a rock song, Kevin smiled. He had nothing to worry about.
***
“That was amazing.” Suzanne Miller followed Lauren into their suite at The Sherbrooke Plaza Hotel located in the heart of New York City. New to Ridgefield, Suzanne taught tap and ballet with Lauren, and they had become friends over the past winter.
Amazing was only one of the many adjectives Lauren would use to describe the show. It had been everything she’d imagined a New York City performance to be and then some.
“I could have sat there all night and watched them perform,” Lauren said, fingering her gold hoop earring. Her eyes once again took in the elegant suite, an odd sense of unease forming inside her.
When they had checked in the previous afternoon, the hotel concierge had immediately descended on them. Despite her protests that it wasn’t necessary, he’d escorted them up to their suite. When she realized their floor could only be accessed with a VIP room card, she’d known Callie hadn’t booked her in any ordinary room. Still, when the elevator doors opened she’d been surprised. Nothing around her resembled the hotels she was used to. Then the concierge unlocked her suite door, and she’d stared at it once again, reminded of just how different Callie’s life had become.
“I still can’t believe this whole trip was a birthday present.” Suzanne stood near the window looking down at the city. “Half my friends forgot to even wish me a happy birthday this year.”