Trevor twitched. “Yeah.”
“That’s it?”
“No, that’s not it!” Trevor’s voice rose to a roar. Heads turned on the other side of the restaurant. Even though his eyes were wild, he noticed and subsided. “She gave me this whole spiel about how Davis doesn’t care about her anymore, and she’s lonely.” He spat that out. “And I said was she serious about Coach Magnoni and she said she didn’t know. She didn’t know,” he repeated in bewilderment and anger. “She was ruining her marriage and everything else, and she didn’t know.”
Richard looked down at his own sandwich, untouched. How could he begin to explain Alexa’s behavior while still preserving her in her son’s eyes? Was that even possible?
But Trevor didn’t wait for him. “I figured out it wasn’t the first time. A couple months before I came home and this other guy was just leaving. Mom looked, I don’t know, rattled, because I wasn’t supposed to be home yet. I thought, weird, and let it go. I asked her and she didn’t want to admit it but she finally did. So then I asked if she’d been screwing Davis while she was still married to Scott and she didn’t exactly say yes but I could tell she was.” He stared at Richard, the betrayal he was feeling stark in his dark eyes. “That’s what happened to you, too, isn’t it? Mom screwed around on you.”
He’d lied, if only by omission, enough to this boy who was becoming a man. Who was only eight months younger than Richard had been when his girlfriend told him she was pregnant.
“That’s what happened,” he said.
“She’s a slut!”
“Trevor…”
“Why did you let her have me and Bree?” The hurt roughened Trevor’s voice. “When you knew?”
So that’s what this had all been about. Richard wished he’d figured it out sooner. Forced a discussion.
“Because she was a good mother,” he said heavily. “She is a good mother. Did you ever have the slightest doubt about that?”
“Yeah, when I walked in and saw my coach humping her!”
Now Richard winced.
“And then you…” Trevor broke off.
“I’m sorry about that. Sorrier than I can tell you. But it is not the same thing.” He made sure Trev saw how serious he was. “Neither Molly nor I are married. Although I hope we will be.”
That set Trevor back. Dark thoughts flickered through his eyes. “You really want…?” he finally asked, hesitating to put it into words.
“I do,” Richard said firmly.
“Wow.”
“Why wow? Well, except I know you and Molly didn’t get off to a very good start....”
“You think?” Trevor sneered.
Richard raised his eyebrows. “Whose fault was that?”
“Mine. Isn’t everything my fault?” Sarcasm mixed with grief in a murky brew.
“No.” For the first time Richard let himself relax. He leaned back in the booth and smiled. “You don’t have that big an ego. Of course it’s not. Some of it is your mother’s fault. Some your idiot assistant coach’s. Some mine,” he admitted.
“I hate her,” Trevor mumbled, and Richard understood he wasn’t talking about Molly.
He told his son some of what he’d figured out about Alexa. “She keeps thinking a man will fill all her needs, and it isn’t possible. So when he fails her, she starts looking again. I didn’t understand it then, and I still don’t. But I hold with my belief that she was a damn good mother.”
“Didn’t you want us?” Hurt made Trevor sound like the little boy he wasn’t anymore.
“More than anything on earth. But after your mother and I split up, I was expecting to get sent to Iraq.”
“You did,” Trevor said slowly. “Not that much later, right?”
Richard nodded. “Less than a year later. If I hadn’t had that hanging over me, I might have asked at least for joint custody. But I didn’t see how I could.” He took a drink of his bottled water. “By the time I got back, she’d remarried. You guys seemed happy. Settled. I was damn near a stranger to Bree at that point, and even you and I had to get reacquainted. And I had the possibility of another tour to contend with.” He shrugged. “When she moved you to California, I felt like a giant sinkhole had opened in the middle of my life. I fell in it every time I so much as thought about you. But you two were doing well. When I saw you, you seemed happy. You both got good grades. Scott was okay with you. I didn’t see what I could do.”
Trevor was nodding. “I guess I can see that.” He grimaced. “And then came Davis.”