Romero bridged the distance between us again and wrapped me in a tight embrace. His smell, his warmth, the way my body perfectly fit against his; this felt right. My eyes found Benito on the ground. I’d tried to be his wife and failed, but I couldn’t be sad about it. I’d never wanted this, and he’d known it from the start. He would have forced himself on me, maybe that didn’t deserve a death sentence but he lived in a world where death was almost always the punishment. His eyes were still open and it seemed they were staring straight through me. The longer I stared at him, the worse their look seemed to get. I shivered violently.
Romero pushed me gently away. “Don’t look at him.” He walked toward the body and turned Benito so he was facing the ground, and no longer me. And just like that I felt better. He was still dead, but at least he wasn’t looking at me with that reproachful expression anymore.
I stumbled toward the bed and sank down. My legs were too shaky to hold me. Romero stood for a moment before he joined me. He brushed his thumb over my cheek, catching a few stray tears. I hadn’t even noticed I’d started crying again. “He’s dead now. He can’t hurt you ever again,” he said roughly. “Nobody will ever hurt you again. I won’t allow it.”
“If you confess to murdering Benito, you’ll be killed and then you won’t be around to protect me from anything.” Maybe it was a low move to play the guilt card but I couldn’t let Romero take the blame.
Romero’s gaze settled on Benito and the puddle of blood slowly spreading around him, turning the beige carpet into a sea of red. “We can’t cover this up. Even if we got him out of the house without anyone noticing, we could never get the blood out of the carpet. People would suspect something. Someone will have to take the blame for this.”
I buried my face in my hands, desperation clawing through my insides. “I should have let him have me. I should have endured it like so many other woman before me. But I had to act like a selfish bitch.”
“No,” Romero said sharply, wedging a finger below my chin and tilting my face up. “I’m glad you stabbed him. I’m glad he’s dead. I’m glad he didn’t get what he doesn’t deserve. You are way too good and beautiful for this bastard.”
I leaned forward and kissed Romero. I would have deepened the kiss, despite everything, would have lost myself in Romero as I always did, but he was more reasonable than I and pulled away. “I have to call Luca. As his soldier, I need to confess to him at least, and then it’s up to him to decide what happens next.”
“And what if he decides to kill you so he can keep the peace with Chicago?” I asked quietly. “You know how angry he was when he found out about us. Even Aria couldn’t convince him to risk war for me.”
For a long time Romero merely looked at me, then he picked up his phone and lifted it to his ear. “Then I’ll accept his judgment.”
“No,” I said suddenly. I shoved his phone away. “Let me call Aria. She can reason with Luca. He listens to her.”
Romero smiled sadly. “This is something even Aria can’t do anything about. Luca is Capo and if he needs to make decisions that protect the Famiglia, he won’t let Aria mess with his mind. You said it yourself. He refused to listen to Aria.”
“Please.”
“I need to do this. I can’t hide behind you or Aria like a coward.” He raised the phone again and this time I didn’t stop him. He was right. Luca would probably be pissed if I tried to use Aria to manipulate him.
I held my breath as I waited for Luca to pick up.
“Luca, I need you to come to Benito’s room.” I heard Luca’s raised voice on the other end but couldn’t make out what he said. It didn’t sound nice. “Yes, I’m there. You should hurry.”
“Damn it!” Luca growled loud enough for me to hear, then he hung up. Romero lowered his phone slowly and put it back into his pocket.
I took his hand, needing to convince myself that he was really there.
Romero glared at Benito’s body but he didn’t try to tell me things would be okay. I was glad he didn’t try to lie to me. I rested my cheek against Romero’s shoulder.
There was a soft knock. I straightened, but my grip on Romero’s hand tightened. I didn’t want to let him go. Once Luca saw what had happened, I might never get the chance to touch Romero’s hand again, at least not while it was still warm. I shuddered when I remembered Mother’s lifeless corpse. I wouldn’t allow that to happen to Romero.
Romero kissed my forehead, then he untangled himself from my grip and got up. I rose too, my eyes darting to Benito. Anger for him welled up in me. If he’d never stepped into my life, then I could have been happy. But Father would probably have found another horrible husband for me. Fear corded up my throat as I watched Romero push down the handle and open the door. What if Luca really decided to kill Romero as punishment?
Romero didn’t open the door all the way, so Aria had to slip in. She sucked in a harsh breath at the sight of my dead husband, then she rushed over to me and clutched my shoulders, but my eyes were frozen on Luca who had walked in after her. His gaze settled on Benito, on the letter opener still stuck in his side and on the hole in the shirt where Romero’s knife had gone in. Romero closed the door noiselessly but didn’t move away. I wished he’d bring some distance between himself and Luca. It was a ridiculous notion. It wouldn’t protect him.