“Everything okay?” Romero asked in a low voice.
I had been staring. I quickly turned my attention to the girl behind the counter who was waiting for our order. “A cappuccino and a Red Velvet Cupcake,” I said distractedly. It was my standard order and my mind was too frazzled to check the blackboard for the daily specials.
“The same for me,” Romero said and took his wallet out to pay for us both.
“You didn’t have to pay for me,” I whispered when we walked toward a free table near the window.
Romero raised one dark eyebrow. “A woman never pays when she’s with me.”
“Oh?” I said curiously. Romero looked like he already regretted his comment but it was too late. He’d piqued my curiosity. “How many girlfriends have you had?”
It was a very personal question.
Romero chuckled. “That’s not something I’m going to tell you.”
“That means many,” I said with a laugh. The server brought our order, giving Romero time to compose himself. The moment she was out of earshot I said, “I know how things are with our men. You have a lot of women.”
“So you know all of us?” Romero asked. He leaned back in his chair like he didn’t have a care in the world.
I took a sip from my cappuccino. “Women talk and from what I hear most Made Men don’t say no to the whorehouses of the Outfit. For most of them it’s some kind of hobby to have as many women as possible.”
“Many men do, but not all of them.”
“So you are the exception?” I asked doubtfully. I wanted it to be true, but I was realistic.
Romero took a bite from his cupcake, obviously considering what to tell me. “I’ve had wild days when I was younger, eighteen or nineteen maybe.”
“And now? Do you have a girlfriend? A fiancée?” I’d always put the thought out of my mind but the way Romero had talked it was a valid option. I sipped at my coffee, glad for the feel of the cup in my hands. It gave me something to focus on.
Romero shook his head with an unreadable look on his face. “No, I’ve had girlfriends in the last few years but it’s difficult to have a steady relationship if work always comes first. I’m a soldier. The Famiglia will always be my top priority. Most women can’t bear it.”
“Most women don’t get asked if they want this life or not. What about an arranged marriage?”
“I don’t like the idea of someone telling me who I should marry.”
“So your family never tried to set you up with someone?”
Romero grinned. I could have jumped over the table and crawled onto his lap. “Of course they have. We’re Italian, it’s in our bloodstream to meddle with our children’s lives.”
“But you never liked any of the girls they suggested?”
“I liked some of them well enough but either they weren’t interested in me or I couldn’t see myself spending the rest of my life with them.”
“And nobody ever tried to force you into marriage?”
“How would they force me?”
I nodded. Yes, how? He was a Made Man, not a stupid girl. “You’re right. You can make your own decisions.”
Romero set down his cup. “Luca could ask me to marry for political reasons. I probably wouldn’t refuse him.”
“But he wouldn’t do that,” I said.
“Maybe you’ll get to choose for yourself as well. You might meet the perfect guy soon and he might be worthy in your father’s eyes.”
The perfect guy sat in front of me. It stung that Romero suggested I’d find someone else. Didn’t he realize I had feelings for him? I didn’t want to find some guy my father would approve of. I wanted the man in front of me.
After that, we talked about random things, nothing of importance, and far too soon we had to make our way back to my home. This time we didn’t link arms. I tried not to be disappointed, but it was hard. When we stepped into the entrance hall of the house, I could feel the weight of the lingering sadness return to my shoulders.
Romero lightly touched my arm. My eyes traced his strong jaw with the hint of dark stubble, his worried browns eyes, his prominent cheekbones. And then I did what I’d promised myself not to do again but right in this moment, in this cold, hopeless house he was the light and I was the moth. I pushed to my toes and kissed him. The touch was the briefest contact, hardly there but it made me long for more. Romero grasped my arms and pushed me away. “Liliana, don’t.”
I untangled myself from his hold and left without another word. Mother had said I should take risks for my happiness, and I was doing just that.Romero
I stormed into the kitchen. I needed another coffee. The door smashed shut behind me with too much force. I wanted to tear something into tiny pieces. My lips still tingled from that ridiculous kiss. You couldn’t even really call it that. It had been over too quick. Because I’d acted like the dutiful soldier I was supposed to be. Fuck it.
I made myself a coffee and emptied it in one gulp, then put the cup down with a loud clang.
The door to the kitchen swung open and Luca leaned in the doorway with a questioning look on his face. “You realize this isn’t your home, right? I don’t think Scuderi appreciates you destroying his expensive marble counter.” The corners of his mouth twitched in an almost smile.
I relaxed against the kitchen island. “I don’t think Scuderi even knows where his kitchen is. Where is he anyway? It’s suspiciously quiet in the house. I thought he and Gianna would never stop fighting.”
Luca’s expression darkened. “They would still be at it, but Scuderi left for a meeting, which I’ll have to do soon as well. Dante and I are going to discuss the Russians tonight at some Italian restaurant he loves.”
“I assume I’ll stay here to keep an eye on the women,” I said tightly. The idea of being around Lily all evening worried me.