He sits back down in his chair, pulling the plate over in front of him, before picking me up once again and depositing me in his lap. It’s a habit he’s picked up over the last two days. When he wants me somewhere, he doesn’t really ask. He just picks me up and puts me there.
“I’ll feed you until it’s all gone.” He picks up some potatoes and brings them to my mouth. I open for him. A feeling warms me deep down. I know I can’t eat all the food, but I’ll give it a go.
I’ve always been the one to take care of my brothers. While they were good to me, this is different. I feel cherished as I sit in his lap while he slowly feeds me, bite by bite. I still like doing things around here, cooking and cleaning, but the way he shows me he cares makes my heart flutter. It makes me believe that maybe being mated to a human isn’t bothering him anymore.
I’ve been mulling over what would happen if our children were human. I don’t know how all that works and what happens when a human mates with a shifter. I know with me, he has the mating pull, so he has no choice but to want me. But would it be different with our kids? He wouldn’t have that special bond with them, and if they were human, he might not love them like they’d deserve.
I push the thought away, not wanting to think about it right now. I want to soak this up, enjoy every moment of being the center of someone’s world. It’s intoxicating, and I want more. For so long I felt like I was waiting for the inevitable, when I wouldn’t be useful to my brothers anymore. My future was so unsettled. All I’ve ever wanted is a real family of my own. One that wouldn’t leave me one day.
What would happen when the final one found their mate? Where would that leave me? I have no real skills besides keeping a home and taking care of people. That had never bothered me, and I liked doing it. But I always worried whether it would be enough to get me by once I was alone.
Koda brings another bite to my mouth, reminding me that I’ll never have to worry about that again. I have a mate to care for now. Maybe I could even make him fall in love with me. Guilt hits me at the thought. He’d probably hate me if he knew it was my father who’d kept him caged.
He’d told me his story late last night. How he came to Gray Ridge to live. That he’d tracked down his sister after being caged for years. He didn’t give me all the details, and I could tell from the look on his face that the memory hurt deep. He hasn’t been free that long. A few years. If I had been stronger, he could have been free years before that. He wouldn’t be carrying that sadness and hate I see in his eyes when he talks about being caged.
Looking around the room, I wonder if he even realizes he went from one cage to another. This one might be nice, but he’s still locking himself away. Even the windows are locked up tight, and I realize I haven’t seen the outside in almost two days. I wonder how my brothers are doing.
“Do you ever open the shutters?” I ask, nodding towards one of the windows.
“No,” he says simply, bringing another bite to my mouth.
“I miss the sun. Has the storm passed?”
“Yes. It’s gone. Stopped sometime last night, but you cannot go outside until I get you something better to wear.”
“But I can go outside? Maybe open the shutters?” A frown forms on his face at my question.
“I don’t think I’ll like people looking at you.”
That shouldn’t make me smile but it does. That makes him smile in turn. I shake my head, and the smile drops as his frown comes back. I laugh at his changeable mood.
“As much as I love being locked away with you, Koda, I have to go out sometimes. I want to. I’ve been kept away from town already for over a month. I’m going a little stir crazy.”
He studies me for a second like he’s thinking it over. “Okay,” he says reluctantly. I beam at him. “But you stay at my side at all times.”
I nod. I’m more than okay with that. I still get a little scared that someday my father might find me. I’ll feel safe with him next to me when we do decide to go out.
“But you still need to eat.” He brings some food to my mouth, and this time I bite his finger when he feeds me. He growls in response. “I like that.”