“I’m not sure,” he says, his voice serious. “When I lost my daughter, I also lost my faith. I went through the last twelve years, just going through the motions… until you attacked me in my club. Now you have me questioning everything.”
He rubs his thumb across my bottom lip. “Before I found you at Logan’s, I couldn’t get you off my mind.”
He pushes a fallen strand of hair behind my ear. “Your touch.” He runs the backs of his knuckles down my cheek. “Your taste.” He leans over and kisses my lips. It’s soft and gentle and has me craving more.
The entire time I was with Gerald I never felt the way I do when I’m around Ethan. My body heats up, and a knot forms in my lower stomach. My lady parts actually throb in anticipation when he’s near. It was so easy to remain true to my beliefs before Ethan because I didn’t feel this kind of pull toward Gerald. But with Ethan, it’s as if he’s one half of a magnet and I’m being pulled in his direction.
“I told myself you were too good for someone like me. I have no business luring you into my fucked up world.”
“Ethan,” I breathe, not liking where this is going.
“I was just supposed to make sure you were safe.” He chuckles humorlessly. “Not keep you.”
“What if I want to be kept?” I ask, my voice clogged with emotion.
“You’re only saying that because I saved you.”
“No.” I shake my head vehemently. “That’s not true. Something is happening between us, and even once I’m safe, I’m still going to want you… unless you don’t…” I trail off, not wanting to voice the words. Unless you don’t want me.
“Are you fucking crazy?” he growls. “I want you every second of every day. It’s why I stayed away from you this last week. Because as soon as I’m around you, I’m afraid I won’t be able to control myself.”
“So don’t.” I lean toward him and frame his face. “Life’s too short to stay in control.”
A growl escapes him and then his mouth covers mine for a punishing kiss. We’re all teeth and tongues and lips. Exploring each other. Getting lost in one another.
And then a throat clears and I’m shot back to reality. We’re at Forbidden Ink in Willow’s workstation and she’s waiting to give me my first tattoo.
“Sorry,” I breathe, as Ethan backs up.
“No worries.” She laughs. “Did you decide what you want to do?”
“Yes.” I look at Ethan. “I would like the quote ‘Live hard. Love harder’, and at the end I would like a heart with a small cross inside it.”
“Colored?”
“No, just black. Simple.”
“Easy enough.” Willow sits at her seat, and after a few minutes, turns around and hands me a piece of paper. “What do you think?”
I stare at the design. It’s just how I pictured it. The quote is in a simple yet elegant font, and at the end is a slanted heart that loops into a small cross.
“This is perfect.” I show it to Ethan and he nods in agreement.
“All right,” Willow says, pushing her chair toward me. “Let’s get started.”
When we enter the room Ethan’s arranged for us at the hotel his family owns, I stop in my place and take in my surroundings. Even though I haven’t done much traveling, I can tell the room is expensive. The rooms I’ve been in have the bed in the center with a cheap desk in the corner. This room, however, is more like an apartment. The living room has a built-in fireplace surrounded by cozy-looking yet upscale couches. A plush rug rests on the floor, and I wiggle my toes, wanting to take my ballet flats off and feel how soft the material is.
There’s a small kitchen with stainless steel appliances to the left, and off the main area is an open door, showing a large king-sized bed. I glance around and notice there are no other doors, which means there’s only one room. The thought of sharing a bed with Ethan should worry me, but it doesn’t. Maybe it’s the adrenaline from just getting my belly button pierced and having a tattoo inked on me, but my heart is thumping against my ribcage in anticipation and excitement.
I step in front of a rectangular mirror that’s hanging on the wall and pull the front of my shirt down enough so I can see my new ink. It’s covered with a thin piece of cellophane, but it’s clear enough I can still make out the elegantly written words and beautiful design.
Lifting my shirt, I glance at my reflection, focusing on the jewels blinking in the light. It’s so girly and pretty, and I love it so freaking much. I’ve only just gotten my first tattoo and piercing and I’m already wanting another one. Willow warned me this would happen. When I smiled into the mirror at the finished ink, she told me to come back any time for my next tattoo. I laughed and told her I only wanted one, but I knew as I spoke the words, I was lying to myself. The entire drive to the hotel, I couldn’t stop thinking about what else I might want to get tattooed or pierced.