She shook her head. She had said her peace and now, she needed to get away from there to think about what she was going to do.
Lexi turned to walk away, and Ramsey took a few steps toward her.
“Just leave me be,” she said.
But he moved forward and grabbed her arm. “You’re not leaving.”
“I need to get away from here. I need to think. I can’t be near you,” she said, tugging on her arm.
“No. You have the wrong idea.”
“Ramsey Bridges, stop it! Stop trying to dig your way out of this hole. I’m so sick of it,” she said, smacking his chest and trying to pull away.
Ramsey released her, and she stumbled a few steps.
“You drive me crazy when you’re angry. Can’t you see reason?”
“You drive me crazy when you lie! Can’t you just tell me the truth?”
“Fuck, Parker!” he cried and then froze.
Lexi’s mouth dropped open. Had he just called her Parker? Oh, f**k no!
“Lexi. I meant, Lexi,” he corrected quickly.
Lexi shook her head in horror. “I’m leaving.”
“Lexi, please…”
But she didn’t hear what he said next because she turned on her heel and bolted from the hallway. She was still dressed in her running gear, and she needed to be anywhere but there in that moment.
He had called her Parker! Oh God, she couldn’t breathe. It infuriated her! She thought she might combust.
Her hands were shaking, and her heart was thudding loudly. Who was she kidding? Her entire body was shaking, trembling, practically convulsing. She didn’t know if it was from embarrassment or anger. Maybe it was a little of both. All she knew was that she wanted to just run. She wanted to get far away, hit that point of exhaustion, that point where she wouldn’t feel anything anymore.
She pushed open the door to the deck, and Jack glanced up at her from his book. When he saw her distraught look, he put his book down on the table and stood.
“Are you okay?” he asked, concern coming through every syllable. “What happened?”
Lexi just shook her head and jogged past him, down the steps, and back into the sand. She heard the door crash open behind her and heard her name being yelled out, but she didn’t slow down, and she certainly didn’t stop. She couldn’t go back there and face Ramsey right now. She needed a chance to clear her head first.
She looked over her shoulder once, just to make sure he wasn’t following her. She saw Jack had his finger in Ramsey’s chest, and then he was yanking on a shirt. Lexi turned back around to see where she was going. She didn’t know how far she was going to run, but she would go until her legs stopped moving.
A second later, she heard feet pounding in the sand behind her. Great. She was going to have to tell Ramsey to leave her alone—again. Couldn’t he see that she just needed to be alone? He could only do more damage by following her.
But when she turned back around, she didn’t see Ramsey at all. It was Jack chasing after her. Despite everything, a small smile touched the edges of her mouth. Wasn’t it just perfectly ironic to have Jack chasing her?
Jack was much taller than her, so she knew that he would catch up soon enough, but he didn’t try calling out to her or asking her to slow down. He just made headway, and when he caught up to her, he matched her pace and jogged alongside her. He didn’t say anything. He just let her run away from her problems…away from everything.
Everything but him.
Her breathing was jagged, coming out in uneven gasps and pants. Her side had a stitch in it that stabbed her with every breath. Her hair was matted, and her body was coated in a layer of sweat and sand that had only gotten worse with her second run. Her feet and legs were starting to feel heavy, and she knew she was slowing. She wasn’t going to be able to keep up this pace for much longer. She was feeling a bit woozy, probably with dehydration, but it had the added benefit of clearing her mind.
Jack was breathing heavily next to her, but he didn’t look as out of it as she did. This must not be a hard pace for him, and he hadn’t just come from a run in any case.
Lexi stumbled and fell onto her bare knees in the sand. Her hands landed roughly down to catch herself, and she groaned as her legs finally stilled. Her whole body was humming alive with the adrenaline coursing through her. Her chest heaved as she stared down at the wet sand, and her vision dipped and blurred. She slammed her hands down again and again on the sand, wanting to make a difference in the shape of the world, but her hands just pushed the sand out of the way, not really changing it at all. It was just an act of displacement…not change…never change.
“Hey. Hey. Hey,” Jack said, sinking into the sand next to her and grabbing her hands.
She fought against him, but he held her tight, keeping her from continuing her assault.
“Lex,” he whispered, “it’s okay.”
“It’s not okay,” she said through tears that she hadn’t even known were spilling down her cheeks.
“It’ll be okay,” he said, pulling her in close to him.
She resisted him. “Stop. I’m disgusting.”
“I don’t care.”
“I’m covered in sand and sweat.”
“You’re still beautiful, and you still need me. So, I’m not going to stop,” he said, drawing her into him and cradling her against his chest.
“You’re not allowed to think I’m beautiful,” she said through her tears.
“Shh…” He stroked her back softly. “I’ll never stop thinking that.”
“Don’t be nice to me. I want to be angry.” Tears were falling so hard now that she could only speak through the hiccups.
“Then, be angry. I’m not going to stop you.”
“I hate you.”
“No, you don’t.”
“Yes, I do.”
“Not even on my worst day, and I’m far from that, Lex.”
“Did you sleep with those girls?” she asked.
Jack stiffened. “What girls?”
“Your secretary…the attendant at your old apartment…other people…”
“No,” he said softly. “No, I didn’t.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” The question had been eating at her, and in her delirious state, she wanted to think about anything but what she had left behind at the beach house.