I walk around the bed and over to her. “Yes.”
“And?” she urges.
“It’s fine, Austin. Stop worrying.” I grab the hem of my shirt she’s wearing.
She takes a step back, but I don’t let go. “Don’t cut this one.”
“I’m not,” I tell her with a smile. “I’m gonna help you out of it.”
I roll it up in my hands and then help her get one arm out at a time. This one is a bigger size, so it’s easier for her to get on and off. Once it’s on the ground, I look over her body as she stands in a pair of little baby blue underwear. You can see her ribs. More than before. Her hips bones are more noticeable too. I run my thumbs over them. She still has bruises from her chest tube and IV. And one peeks out under a fresh bandage.
“Cole.” She takes my hands in hers and pulls them away from her. “Your dad—”
“He’s not gonna stop us.” I interrupt her. Might as well give her peace of mind when it comes to that bastard. All of Lilly’s stuff is already packed and in the U-Haul, as well.
She seems pacified with that answer and nods once. I help her into bed and then lie down beside her. Pulling her to me, I inhale her scent again. Fuck, I’ve missed her so much.
“What about Shane?” she asks softly.
“Someone else you don’t need to worry about.”
“But he has to know what you guys did?” She draws little circles on my bare chest. Her fingers softly touching me. “Have you seen him?”
“No,” I lie.
I don’t want to worry her ’cause the truth is I don’t know what to do about Shane just yet.
She believes me, and asks, “What’s wrong with Deke?”
I hold in a sigh. Her mind is filled with so many questions, and I hate how much she sees. How much she worries. “If I had to guess, I would say he’s upset over Becky breaking up with him.” But I’m not sure that’s what it is. He’s more pissed than upset.
“They broke up?” Her fingers pause on my skin.
Guess Becky hasn’t spoken much to her about her personal life lately. “Yes.”
She buries her face into my chest and sighs heavily. I tighten my arms around her, and she flinches. “I’m sorry.” I immediately loosen my hold.
“They’ll figure it out.” She ignores my apology.
“Maybe.” I’m not so sure, though. If Deke knew what I knew, he’d be so pissed at her. And me.
“You told me that he loves her.” She yawns.
“I did.” I run my hand over her soft hair. “He does.” I’m not sure now.
“Then they will figure out a way to make it work.”
I pull away from her enough to look down at her face. Her eyes are closed and her lips slightly parted. When I run my knuckles down her cheek, she opens her eyes and looks up at me. “Are you okay?” she asks.
I don’t answer her. I’m not sure how. Saying yes would be another lie, and answering no would worry her. I already had problems sleeping before she came into my life, but now it’s pretty much nonexistent. I’ve been running on fumes for too long.
She sighs. “I can tell something is bothering you. Please tell me.”
This time, I decide to lie again. What’s one more? “Nothing is bothering me.”
“Cole”—she pulls away and slowly sits up— “I want you to talk to me.”
I sit up too. She has the sheet pulled up to her chin, shielding her body, and I wonder why she chooses now to hide from me. But I don’t pull it away. I cup her cheek, unable to keep my hands to myself. Not like I ever have since I met her.
“Cole, please …? Whatever it is. We will get through it together.”
She thinks I’m hiding more from her. I am, of course, but it’s all to protect her.
“Did you …?”
“I love you.” It’s the only words I can think to say to her.
The only thing that I know with a hundred percent certainty at this very moment. I’ve known it for a while now. Everything else is out of my control. I don’t know if Shane will come for me. I don’t know if my father will one day want Lilly. And I don’t know if Austin will one day wake up and realize I’m not good enough for her and leave me.
Her lips part, and her eyes widen.
“I love you, Austin Lowes. And I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner.” Those beautiful green eyes begin to well with tears. God, she’s so gorgeous. “You’ve changed me, sweetheart. And I’m gonna do everything in my power to protect you and take care of you.”
My hand slides into her soft hair, and she closes her eyes, sucking in a shaky breath. When they open, the first tear rolls down her cheek. Then the second tear falls. And the third as we sit in silence. My heart pounds in my chest, waiting for her to say something to me. Anything. Even if it’s that she hates me. I can work on that. I can show her how much I love her …