When I walk outside, Jase is standing by the door. “Everything okay? I didn’t want to bug you guys, but I wanted to make sure she’s all right.”
“She’s okay. We’re going to meet for lunch tomorrow. She wants to meet you, but doesn’t want you to see her like that.”
“That’s understandable,” he says. “Sky will be with her grandparents for a few more hours. What do you say we head back to the hotel and spend the rest of the day with me inside you?” He waggles his eyebrows, and I throw my head back with a laugh.
“You’re so crude.”
“And you love it.”
Twenty-One
Celeste
“Isn’t it so pretty?” Skyla flips her sketchpad over so I can see the dress she’s drawing.
“It’s beautiful,” I tell her honestly.
While Jase watches a baseball game downstairs at the bar, Skyla and I are sitting outside on the balcony of our suite—I’m drinking a glass of wine, and she’s drawing in her sketchpad. She returned from dinner with her grandparents a little while ago and put on a fashion show with all of her new clothes. The girl has exquisite taste, that’s for sure.
Afterward, Jase asked if I minded if he met up with a few of his friends downstairs at the bar to watch the game. It’s been a while since he’s seen them, so they all wanted to catch up. He invited Skyla and me to join, but neither of us wanted to go—plus, none of the other guys were bringing their significant others. So I told him Skyla and I would hang out up here and insisted he go.
“We should make a swimwear line too,” Skyla says while drawing the beginning lines of a swimsuit. Her tongue sticks out just a bit, her teeth biting down on it, something she always does when she’s concentrating. “When I went shopping today, there were so many ugly bathing suits.” She scrunches her nose up in disgust. “So many ruffles and hearts.” She mock-shivers.
“There’s nothing wrong with ruffles or hearts,” I tell her. “You just have to know where to put them, and always remember less is more.” I shoot her a playful wink and she giggles. “Speaking of bathing suits…” I glance down at the lit up pool. “Why don’t we go swimming?”
“Really?” She stops drawing to look up at me, her adorable face lighting up in excitement. “I’ve never been swimming in the dark!”
“Yes, really, and it’s called night swimming. Let’s go put our suits on and we can go down for a little while.”
There are a few people at the pool, but because it’s already almost ten o’clock at night, they’re all adults and keep to themselves. One couple is making out in the corner of the deep end and look like they’re halfway to going all the way. So I suggest we check out the shallow end, which luckily, since the pool is shaped like a kidney, is around the corner. The last thing I want to do tonight is have the sex talk with Skyla.
We spend the next hour or so swimming laps and talking about fashion. She tells me about a boy who she likes and is looking forward to seeing when school starts up again. When the jacuzzi empties, we turn it on and relax in the bubbles for a little while. I can tell when Skyla is getting tired because she yawns several times and rubs her eyes. She may act like she’s older a lot of the time, but she’s still barely a teenager.
After we rinse off and change into our pajamas, she asks if we can watch an episode of Elite Model on her iPad. Snuggling into her bed with her, I pull it up on YouTube. Not even ten minutes into it, her eyes are fluttering closed. I click pause on the show and her eyes open a little at the silence before closing again.
Climbing out of her bed, I stand and lean over to kiss her forehead. “Good night, pretty girl,” I say softly. I turn to walk out, when Skyla murmurs sleepily, “G’night, Mom, love you.”
My heart stills then picks up speed. She didn’t mean to say that, I tell myself. She saw her mom this morning and the word just slipped out. But as I walk to my room, I can’t get the three letter word out of my head. Maybe she didn’t mean to say it, but what if she did? And if she didn’t mean to, who’s to say that one day she won’t say it on purpose? Every girl deserves to have a mother. One who loves and protects her. Skyla was cheated out of having a mom, and she deserves better than to have me as a poor substitute. I’m just learning how to love Jase. I can’t be responsible for both of their hearts. I can’t fail them both.