My grandma waved her hand again.
“It’s all about money with young folks,” she said breezily. “Why are you making it all about money?”
I sputtered.
“Because that’s what it was about!” I almost shrieked. “That’s what the bargain was!”
But Nana wasn’t thrown by my tantrum at all.
“That’s true,” she said slowly. “Maybe the agreement started out as an employment contract. But honey, look around you. See this apartment? See how much he loves you, making sure your family has a nice place to live? Look how much work he put in, so your brother can go to a better school. These aren’t the signs of a man who doesn’t care.”
I shook my head, tired all of a sudden.
“He’s a billionaire,” I said listlessly. “He has staff to do all this. It’s not like Kane painted the walls himself.”
Nana cocked her head at me, blue eyes sharp.
“That’s true,” she acknowledged. “But he put in the time, he put in the emotion, and that’s what counts. This man wants you to be happy, my dear girl, and it’s all around us, it’s everywhere. Open your heart and see for yourself.”
And slowly, I did as she asked. The cream walls were beautiful, the crown molding on the walls just right, the baseboards an ornate design, perfectly in keeping with the style of the apartment. The alpha knew how much I loved design, how I wanted to go to art school at some point, to better myself, educate myself, and Kane had taken the first step for me, surrounding me with beauty, making sure that my senses were imbued on a day-to-day basis with subtle visuals, reminding me of what I wanted to become.
And slowly, my heart began softening a bit. Before, I’d hated this apartment. Not hated it because it was a terrible place to be, but hated it because it was a constant reminder of him, of what I couldn’t have.
But now, seeing the apartment with new eyes, I was filled with hope. Because it also reminded me of the good parts of Kane, how he’d listened to my words, how he cared, how he wanted me to be safe, comfortable and happy, urging me towards my dreams even now, speaking to me from thousands of miles away.
And Nana was right. No man does this for you if he feels nothing. No man goes to such an extent, providing for your grandmother and little brother, people he’s never met. He’d only known of them from our conversations, how I’d opened my heart and told him about Mattie and Nana, how important they were to me, and by doing all this, he was showing me that they were important to him too.
So I looked at my grandmother then, taking a deep breath.
“So what do I do now?” I asked tremulously. “If he cares, what do I do now?”
The old lady chuckled softly.
“You tell him of course. Be brave, my girl, speaking from the heart is always your best bet.”
I exhaled then, the air in my lungs shaky.
“But how?” I asked plaintively. “Kane’s in Nevada.”
And Nana shrugged, eyes twinkling.
“Dear heart, I don’t know exactly how, but isn’t there technology these days? Aren’t there all sorts of programs you can use to call people on your computer, you see their faces on your phone? I don’t know, Becky, but I know you’ll figure it out.”
And I took another deep breath, trying to steady my lungs. Because there were all sorts of programs, WhatsApp, Snapchat, Skype, and there had to be some way I could reach Kane. All I had to do was figure it out, problem-solve a little, and if I came upon an obstacle, I’d find a way around it. I didn’t get this far just to give up, I wasn’t that type of girl. So shoring up my courage, I nodded.
“Thanks Nana, I’ll look for a way,” I said in a tremulous voice. “There’s definitely a way.”
And my grandmother patted my knee.
“I know you will baby, because that’s the brave girl I raised. Now help me with this laundry,” she said with smile. “Because I’m not sure where to put your pile of lingerie.”
I had to laugh at that, able to breathe easy for the first time in a long while, my heart breaking open as a swell of emotion flooded me. Because the pile of purple thongs looked ludicrous on our couch, so out of place that it was funny, and my Nana has a wicked sense of humor. Besides, she was right. The situation was complicated, the way Kane and I met was insane, but there was a simple solution. I could tell him how I felt, I could confront him, and something would happen, for sure. Maybe I’d fall on my face and be embarrassed forever, praying the Earth would swallow me whole. But maybe, just maybe, the alpha might like me back. Who knows?