The thought of losing Eva made his heart squeeze tightly in his chest, making it impossible to breathe. Lifting her chin with his finger, he lowered his mouth to hers, kissing her with all the love he felt inside.
Their kiss lingered for long, breathless moments until she broke away from him. She placed her hand on his chest, gasping for breath in a way that made her cough again. “We shouldn’t do this,” she managed.
“Because of your cough? I know, I’ll take you to the hospital soon.”
“Not because of that.” She rolled her eyes.
“Then why not?” Finn didn’t understand. “The danger is over, Eva. We have everyone in custody. Thanks to you, we’ve busted up the drug ring once and for all.”
“I’m glad about that. Truly.” The way she avoided his gaze bothered him. “But we can’t be together, Finn. As you said, the danger is over. It’s time for you to move on.” She lifted her face to his. “Isn’t that what you do? Isn’t that what has made the Gallagher charm so famous among the other K-9 cops?”
“Not this time.” He looked deep into her beautiful blue eyes, trying to think of a way to convince her. “I don’t want to move on, Eva. I want you. To be with you. Because I love you. When I realized you were still inside the fire... I nearly lost my mind.”
Her smile was sad and she shook her head. “You might think you love me, Finn, but that feeling will fade over time along with my eyesight. You have your whole life ahead of you. You’ll find someone else to love. Someone that won’t be legally blind in the next few years.”
“You’re wrong about me, Eva.” He couldn’t help being upset by her attitude.
“I already had one boyfriend who dropped me because of my diagnosis. I’d rather not go through that again.” When he opened his mouth to argue, she lifted a hand to stop him. “Besides, I’m not wrong about your track record with women.”
That stopped him because it was true. “Yeah, okay. Until I met you, I wasn’t interested in commitment. Cops aren’t good husbands or fathers. My mom—” He grimaced, then forced himself to tell her the truth. “Let’s just say she couldn’t stand being married to a cop. She and my dad fought all the time, until one day she up and left. I was eight years old.” The memory of that day had faded over time, but the sense of loss had never left him. “I didn’t see her again until I was an adult. No Christmas presents, no birthday cards. Nothing.”
Eva gasped and clutched his arms. “Finn. That’s horrible!”
He shrugged. “It wasn’t easy. But me and my dad became really close. He was a good man and a great cop. I was proud to follow in his footsteps.”
“Your mom... Do you think something happened to her?” Eva asked. “I can’t believe she’d just disappear from your life like that.”
“Not knowing bothered me, so I looked for her. Found her about ten years ago in New Jersey. She’s remarried and has two kids. Her husband left the house wearing a business suit, so I figure he’s a lawyer or an accountant. Something safe. The complete opposite of a cop.”
“Her loss. I think you’re amazing, Finn.” Eva tightened her grip on his arms, then released him. “Your dedication to protecting the people of New York, to upholding the law, is honorable. Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise. You’re a good cop and a good man just like your dad. Your mother was wrong to leave like she did.” She tilted her head to the side. “What did she say when she saw you?”
“She didn’t.” It was his turn to avoid her gaze. “I didn’t bother talking to her. She made her choice. I watched her interact with her new family for a while, then turned and walked away.”
“Oh, Finn.” Eva sighed. “You deserve so much better.”
That made him smile. “You’re right about that, Eva.” He drew her close again. “I deserve you.”
Her internal struggle played across her features. Ironically, it gave him hope knowing that she was protesting more because of her impending blindness than a lack of returning his feelings.