“No, it wasn’t. I could have gotten away with it, and Sofia would never know. But I wasn’t tempted at all…because there’s only one woman I want to be with. Even if she doesn’t love me, even if she’s pissed at me, I’m a slave to her. It’s depressing but also exhilarating at the same time. Sofia is the best vintage bottle of wine, and everything else is horse piss. Once you’ve had the best, you can never go back.”
“Sounds intense.”
“What else did she say?”
He shrugged. “She said she’s never been in love before. Your relationship is perfect as it is because you’re a good husband who’s honest and powerful…and you’re in good in bed. And if she ever does fall in love with someone someday, she still wouldn’t betray you.”
That stung the most.
Fuck, that hurt.
It was the first time I couldn’t control my reaction. I released a deep hiss from between my teeth, feeling the searing heat cook my insides once more. The idea of loving me was so ridiculous to her that it was more likely she would fall in love with someone other than me. My eyes dropped to the floor.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “But if it makes you feel any better, it has nothing to do with you. We never should have walked into that purple tent in Marrakech. Maybe things would have been different…or maybe they would have been the same anyway.”
I’d wondered the same thing. Did that fortune come true because she read it to me? Or would this have happened whether we visited Morocco or not? I slouched in the chair and felt the strength leave my limbs. The devastation was still potent in my blood, like I’d lost her for the second time.
“That’s why I wonder if it would be better for you to just forget about her…”
“I can’t forget about her.” During the two years we were apart, I still thought about her on a daily basis. I wondered where she slept at night. Anytime I was with a brunette, I pretended she was Sofia to give me a better climax. Leaving her would only revert me back to that endless loneliness.
He shook his head slightly. “How could a woman be so cold? Is she cold because of this curse? If you weren’t being punished for what you’ve done, would she be a different woman? Is she damned because of this too?”
“No idea.”
He turned quiet as he considered all the possibilities.
The fortune reader told me this was punishment for the crimes I’d committed. I’d done a lot of terrible things, but I wondered if killing my father was the specific action that triggered all of this. I wished I could take it all back, to have a clean slate with Sofia, sweep her off her feet and make her fall for me.
Or would I never have loved her in the first place?
An idea came into my head. “You think she’s still there?”
“Who?” he asked. “Sofia?”
“No. That woman in the purple tent in the bazaar.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “No idea. We were there ten years ago, and she was kinda old…why?”
“What if I went back and spoke to her?”
“What would that accomplish?”
“Maybe I could do something to fix it.”
“Like pay her off?” he asked. “I don’t think it works like that.”
“But maybe there’s something I could…a ritual or something. A blessing. I don’t know. Maybe she read my future as it would unfold at that point. But what if I could do something to change the rest of the story?”
He shrugged. “No idea.”
“That’s why I’m going to ask her.”
“So you’re going back to Marrakech?”
“Yeah. I’ll leave in the morning.”
“I’m coming with you.”
I eyed all the bruises on his face. “You’re in no condition, Damien.”
“Yeah, but you can’t do this alone.”
“I can do anything alone.”
“But we were together the first time we went. Maybe we need to be together the second time.”
“You’re just going to slow me down.”
He stopped arguing, his eyes defeated.
“Why do you want to go so bad?”
He wouldn’t make eye contact. “I guess I want to ask her about my fortune…if it’s really going to happen.”
I sat on the patio in my sweatpants and finished work before bed. The doors were open, so I heard Sofia walk inside after she finished dinner with her mother. There was no way to miss me when she walked inside, so she chose to ignore me.
She was lucky she didn’t have to witness my dark side.
I closed my tablet and brought it inside along with my glass of scotch.
She was already dressed for bed, wearing one of my t-shirts with her panties underneath. She pulled her hair over one shoulder, naturally sexy without even trying.
I was angry with her for being angry with me, but that didn’t stop me from getting hard. Just hours ago, my favorite courtesan was on her knees and ready to suck my dick, but there was no blood between my legs. The sight of my wife in my t-shirt giving me the cold shoulder made me so hard it actually hurt.