Ainsley’s eyes widened. “Spill the tea. Please. I’ve been cooped up in a lab for weeks and watching Disney movies on loops. I need good gossip.”
I filled Ainsley in on everything that had happened over the past two weeks with my promotion and the standards Jake expected from me. She listened with her lips pursed around her straw, and by the time I’d gotten through my story, she’d drained the contents of her glass and switched to sipping her water.
Ainsley picked at the scallop appetizer we’d ordered. “Do you want me to give you advice, or do you just need to vent and get all this off your chest?”
“Honestly? I’d appreciate some advice. I just feel so stuck working for him. He doesn’t respect me or my time, but the money is so hard for me to walk away from. If I could balance my schedule to a more reasonable amount of hours, this could be the perfect scenario for me. And I definitely think I could get consistent raises out of him over time and make even more money.”
“So, that’s the goal? More money?”
“I mean, I guess so?”
Ainsley gave me that warm, reassuring smile of hers. “Well, as you know, I can relate to the experience of working for a hardass with impossible expectations and no appreciation for pleasantries in the office.”
I laughed. My brother had been a real piece of work when Ainsley started working for him at his labs, St. Clair Technologies and Designs. For as long as I could remember, Beckham had been obsessed with being the best at everything he put his mind to. He and Ainsley had dated in college and their relationship fractured and fell apart when he became jealous that she was Valedictorian instead of him. My parents and I saw that for what it was—the biggest mistake he ever made. Then last year, as if by fate, he needed help with a new launch, and Ainsley was the only woman for the job. Their work and their passions brought them back together, and now they were stronger than ever and planning a wedding.
I didn’t want to fall in love with my boss. I just wanted to be able to work together in harmony.
“What should I do?” I asked.
“I think the most important thing for you to figure out before you make any choices is if this job makes sense for you. What are the pros?”
I shrugged.
“Give it some thought,” Ainsley said. “All I ever wanted to do with my tech was help people. My new chip protects people from malware and viruses and scams, mostly children and the elderly. That’s what sets my soul on fire, not the money or the prestige of working at SCTD. Sure, those are nice perks, but they aren’t my big why. You need to find your why.”
I frowned. That was a hard question. “I think I want to help people, too.”
“Does working for Jake create that opportunity?”
I considered the question for a moment and popped a delicious scallop in my mouth. “In a way, yes. He invests in start-up businesses, and so far, all the people I’ve met are really good people with strong moral values who want to create something out of nothing. For example, he’s working closely with this family opening a restaurant together. It was so cool to see a whole family coming together for a project, and I was able to offer suggestions that Jake thinks would make them even more successful. That was the highlight of my week by far.”
“Is that feeling enough to keep you going?” Ainsley leaned back when our server brought over more food, a goat cheese salad with candied pecans and parmesan and herb seasoned fries. We both dug in, and Ainsley continued. “If you had your weekends off and you worked until a reasonable hour during the week and you were able to help people envision their business, would it be worth it?”
In other words, would it be worth putting up with Jake?
I chewed the inside of my cheek. “I think it might. I just wonder how long I could put up with him. He can be so insensitive and impatient and downright mean. I’ve seen him make countless women in the office cry. He hardly bats an eye. It’s like he thinks they’re the problem.”
“Yikes.”
“I know. He’s such an ass.”
“I’m marrying one of those.” Ainsley shook her head and smiled wistfully. “Beckham used to be so dark and gloomy. I used to walk into his office and feel the energy shift. It was like he could suck all the hope out of a person just by looking at them.”
“What changed?”
“I got curious, I guess. I tried to understand him. I mean, he and I had history, so it’s not the same as you and Jake, but at the end of the day I realized that there was a difference between a cruel man and a man who needed saving from himself. Beckham was the latter. Maybe Jake is, too.”
“How do I know the difference?”
Ainsley sighed. “That’s not the question you need to ask yourself. What you need to ask is, are you willing to stay and help him find redemption, or is it best to walk away to preserve your own peace?”
I chewed a French fry. Did Jake even deserve redemption? Did this responsibility really have to fall on me? I didn’t believe in the bullshit that had been shoved down women’s throats for generations that we could save a man or a bad boy. People didn’t change. Not really.
But my brother did.
Ainsley must have felt the storm brewing inside of me because she reached across the table and patted my hand. “You don’t owe him anything. You can walk away.”
“I think a lot of people have walked away from him. Maybe having one person stay will help him see that not everyone is against him.”
Ainsley averted her gaze and appeared to be way more interested in her salad than any normal person should be.
“Say it,” I said.
“Say what?”
“Whatever it is that’s on your mind. Just say it.”
Ainsley pushed her food around the plate before finally meeting my gaze once more. “You’re his assistant, Gabi. You’re not his therapist, his mother, or his partner. This isn’t on you to fix. And even if you did? That could lead to a seriously dependant and—dare I say—fucked-up relationship. Jake is a grown man. Worry about doing right by yourself, not by him.”