The way it had me itching to go on a murder spree.
I doubted much weighing any of the risks now would make me change my mind.
None of it would make me take it back.
Still, I was letting the disquiet come out with the explanation. “There was a big game at one of my most affluent client’s places. He likes to play big. High stakes. All-in kind of shit. Played a couple times at his table over the last few months. I didn’t know what I was walking in on last night, but I found myself sitting across from Jarek Urso.”
“Fuck.” It heaved from Trent in a bout of horrified shock. He scrubbed a tatted palm over his face, like it might flush out the mistake he’d undoubtedly believed I’d made.
“Yup.”
Trent eyed me seriously, like he was calculating those days, trying to make it add up.
“You have history with her?”
Shallow, disheartened laughter rumbled out. “You could say that.”
Shame bound my spirit.
All the warnings Trent had given me to lay low when it came to the Costas. The way I’d promised again and again that I would. That I was keeping my nose clean.
Never had I let my brothers in on what’d gone down with Aster. Not after everything that had happened. Not with the choices I’d made that started a domino effect that I couldn’t undo.
I didn’t even know how to give voice to the loss.
Guilt bottled tight in my chest.
Agitation buzzed from Trent. “How deep, Logan?”
My eyes dropped closed. “Really fucking deep.” I opened them, bitterness getting ground up in the clench at the back of my teeth.
“But she ended up with Jarek?” Jud issued it like he was processing it, too, though his voice was tinged in understanding.
“That’s right.”
“Shit,” Trent said low.
“And last night you ended up sitting across from her husband at a shady table at one of your client’s places,” Jud added like fact, scratching at his beard.
I was sure by the look on his face that he’d come to the quick conclusion that revenge was the sum I’d been aiming for.
“That is correct, brother.” I swallowed around the landslide of jagged rocks that tumbled down my throat. “He and I were the last men standing. His stack was depleted fast.”
I drove my fingers through my hair. “I just wanted to push him. Shame that motherfucker. So when he pressed to go all in, I called for his girl instead.”
My girl.
Jud all but groaned, flopping his big body back in the booth. “You are a twisted fuck, you know that, Logan?”
A short shot of laughter rumbled out. “Made me crazy, her standing there with him.”
I hadn’t even acknowledged it then. The way I’d wanted to climb right over that table, put a bullet between his eyes, and take back what was mine.
“I thought I’d prove a point. Get him on his knees. But I didn’t think for a second he’d bite. But I already knew the bastard was a snake, so I’m not sure why I was surprised. Asshole lost, obviously. Let’s just say Aster was not pleased by me trying to claim my prize.”
“Tell me she knocked you clean flat.” Jud cocked a smirk.
I smiled with a rough chuckle. “Girl wanted to claw my eyes out, that’s for sure. She ran upstairs instead, saying she wasn’t going anywhere with either of us.”