CHAPTER60
LARISA
While it was disappointing to wake up without Tanner beside me, I didn’t mind that he’d opted to go back to his place last night instead. I knew whatever he’d had going on had probably just run late and he hadn’t wanted to wake me. I was, however, just a little bit worried about him.
He hadn’t been very communicative last night, which was very unlike him now that we were together. He usually checked in quite often and I almost always knew where he was. Since he hadn’t said much, I just hoped everything was okay. My spidey senses were tingling, and I had a feeling something had happened that he hadn’t wanted to tell me about.
Once I was properly awake and dressed, I decided to walk to the café on the corner for a coffee. As hypocritical as it was for someone who’d made such a big deal about us making our own coffee, I’d been spoiled by the stuff he’d been ordering, and since I wanted to get some fresh air anyway, I figured a walk for a coffee ticked both boxes.
I hoped Tanner would be up and we could talk by the time I got back. This nagging feeling that something had gone wrong would only go away once I knew he—and we—were fine.
The sun was already out when I got to the sidewalk, and the air outside was balmy and nice. I smiled to myself as I walked, thinking about Tanner and how great he’d been recently. It still amazed me that we’d gotten to a point where we were so comfortable together after everything we’d been through.
I weaved my way through the other pedestrians, head in the clouds about my incredible boyfriend. I had so many projects in the works that I should’ve been thinking about instead, but I just couldn’t quite concentrate on them right then.
It’s okay. It’s still early. I’ve got plenty of time to work as soon as I’ve had my coffee.
When I got to the café, I stood in line and surveyed the blackboard displaying my options behind the counter. Usually, I just took my coffee normal with a splash of cream and sugar, but I was in the mood for something different.
Oh, the times, they are a’changing. Still smiling, I placed my order for a shot of caramel in my coffee, knowing it wasn’t super adventurous but still proud of myself for venturing a little outside my comfort zone.
“I’ll be right over there,” I told the barista, motioning to a table next to the window that had been vacated a minute ago.
He nodded, and I went to snag the table before someone else did. When my coffee came, I sipped it and scrolled through my phone, answering a few emails before opening my browser. Near the top of the articles suggested for me, there was a clickbait headline about New York’s newest billionaire bachelor finding true love. Next to it was a picture of Tanner, and my brows shot up.
I’d known it would only be a matter of time before the media caught wind of our relationship, but I certainly hadn’t been expecting the news to break today. A chill traveled through me, but I couldn’t quite pinpoint if it was anxiety or excitement.
The prospect of him being publicly tied to me was exciting since it meant that things really would be official then, but it was also nerve-wracking to think that my name and face would be in the news. I’d never had an article written about me before, and I kind of liked it that way. But I was with someone who was in the public eye, and I had known what that meant before I’d committed to him.
Opening the article, I held my breath while I waited for it to load. When it did, however, it wasn’t a picture of me with him I was staring at, but one of him with another woman. She and Tanner were grinning and their faces were pressed together. The pretty blonde looked all bright-eyed and perky as she glanced at him.
My stomach crashed to my shoes and bile pushed up my throat. The photo is dated last night. Is that what he was doing? Is this why I didn’t hear from him, because he was with someone else?
The mere thought that he’d canceled our date to go out with another woman splintered my heart in two. I felt it breaking as I stared at the picture, seeing his sparkling blue eyes staring right back at me through the screen.
Immediately, my gut told me to block him on everything. He’d promised that he was done fucking around with other women, but obviously, he hadn’t changed his ways. I was being exclusive to him, but clearly he wasn’t doing the same.
My stomach rolled and tears burned the backs of my eyes. Shoving my chair back, I grabbed my purse and fled to the bathroom. I needed a minute, and I didn’t want everyone in the café and out on the street witnessing the breakdown I felt coming on.
I’d trusted him. I’d really believed him when he’d said he only wanted to be with me, but it had all been a lie. Trying not to cry, I splashed water on my face and gripped the edge of the porcelain sink. Then I looked up into the mirror and wondered how I could’ve been so stupid.
Has he really been playing me this whole time?It felt surreal. Unreal. No one could be that good at faking it, could they?
As I thought back over the last couple of weeks, I forced myself to slow down. This really didn’t look good, but that didn’t mean it was what it looked like. The media was known for putting their own spin on things and making them into things they weren’t. Maybe that was what was going on here.
That explanation seemed far more likely than Tanner canceling on me to go out with another woman. He’d been so sweet since we’d gotten together, and he’d assured me time and again that he had changed. That he wasn’t interested in anyone else and that he wanted us to give things a real go.
He’d also been honest and earnest about our relationship, and as much as it might’ve made me naïve, I really couldn’t believe it had all been lies. I’d looked into his eyes, heard his tone of voice, and seen how serious he was about us.
If he had been lying or faking it, he was a fucking master of deceit and I refused to believe that about him. Not now that I knew him so much better.
No. There has to be something more to it.
Sucking in a shaky breath, I splashed water on my face one last time and decided to give him a chance to explain before I blocked him. If this was true and he had gone out with another woman last night, that was it.
There would be no more chances. No more trying to see if we could make it work. I couldn’t go all in with him again if he was still playing the field. I would never be able to trust him again, and what was more, I wouldn’t want to. I had no interest in pursuing something with a man who couldn’t commit, and while I’d believed that he wanted to, if he wasn’t capable of it, then that was the end of the road for us.
My eyes looked haunted even to me as I stared back at myself in the mirror. I was so torn. So confused.