“If you need us for anything, don’t hesitate to call,” Smokey said. “We’ll come for you.”
“And if you need me for the Twisted Bastards, let me know. I’ll be here. I’ll always have your backs.”
Smokey slammed his hand on the table, dismissing everyone. Raven got to her feet, and she was shocked as Ugly Beast pulled her in for a hug. The guy wasn’t known for affection.
“Wow, Ugly, I’m coming back. You can bet your ass on that.” What was with this guy?
“Bella’s party?”
“Oh, crap,” Raven said, pulling away. That was this weekend, and she was going to miss it. She looked toward Smokey. “I’ve already given my gift to Abriana. Give Bella a big hug from me, and tell her that I’ll be back soon.”
Ugly Beast let her go, but his lips were in a grim line. She hadn’t wanted to miss Bella’s party, but doing this for the club had to come first. There would be other parties. She hoped Bella wouldn’t be pissed off at her.
“Cheer up. You don’t have to take care of me for the time being, and my bad judgment of character.”
His frown deepened.
The guys all pulled her in for a hug, and Raven was taken aback by their affection. She had fought side by side with them. Taken bullets for them, and beatings. She would die for all of them. They were her family and the truth was, they were like brothers to her.
She noticed Brick and Kinky held her even tighter than usual.
With her goodbyes taken care of, church ended, and she left the room. Carlos was there, waiting for her.
She frowned as she saw a pair of heels in his hand.
“What are those?”
“I know you love your boots, but we’re heading back to the city, and that means they have got to go.”
She loved her boots. They were comfy. They had gotten her through a whole lot of shit.
“Fine.” There was no reason to argue. “They’re still coming with me.”
She removed her shoes and socks, took the heels from him, and slid them onto her feet.
The club was watching.
Carlos took her hand, but she pulled away, gave the guys a final wave, and then, with her boots in hand, left the building. She hated leaving.
Carlos’s car was waiting in the driveway.
Other than the boots, she wasn’t taking anything else with her. Not her leather cut, nothing.
This … hurt.
Raven wasn’t even sure if she was ready to do this. The clubhouse had been her home for so long. The guys were her family. This was her life, and leaving it behind felt wrong.
Climbing into the car, she stared at the clubhouse.
No one had come outside. That was good. She wanted to imagine them having a party with her gone.
Carlos threw the car into reverse, and they pulled out of the parking lot.
It was time for her to get into character. She’d never been a great actress, but for the club, she would do her best.
This was the first time she had left the Hell’s Bastards MC.
Was this how it felt to leave home? To move out of a parent’s home?
Raven took a deep breath, and her chest felt tight.
They want you gone.
You’re a bitch.
They hate you.
They would rather get rid of you to Carlos than keep you.
You’re nothing.
Just a fucking whore.
A slut.
Carlos grabbed her hand. “Are you okay?”
With one touch, the voices in her head were immediately silenced. “Yeah, er, yeah, I’m fine.”
She focused on the grip of his hand around hers.
There was no room for doubt.
No room to lose focus.
Taking a deep breath in and another out, she kept on counting. In and out. In and out.
She had this.
For the club.
For Smokey, she would do this.
****
“You shouldn’t have let her go,” Ugly Beast said.
“We need to make sure Carlos is safe.”
“He’s not our responsibility.” Ugly Beast was starting to lose his temper. Did Smokey truly believe they were all blind to what he’d done? Hunter saw it, as did Brick and Kinky. Smokey was cleaning shop. “You know it as well as I. You’re getting rid of Raven.”
Smokey’s jaw clenched. He didn’t deny it.
Ugly Beast shook his head. “You’re fucking wrong in doing this, Smokey.”
“Raven will be taken care of.”
He stared at his Prez and shook his head again. “Carlos is in on it, isn’t he? Was there even a hit out on him?”
“Yes, of course. I wouldn’t get involved. Carlos’s life is in danger, and our relationship is important. I don’t need to remind you how dangerous it is for us to be at war with them! It’s why you married Abriana.”
“I remember everything, but you’re clearly fucking forgetting everything. Raven is loyal to the club. Not to the mafia. You’re sending her into the lion’s den, and you have no intention of her ever returning.”
“She will be fine.”
Ugly Beast got to his feet. His rage was … filling him up. “Will you get rid of yourself, Smokey? Are Brick and Kinky fucking next? How far will this fucking guilt go?”