She didn’t understand. The sickness wasn’t something I could turn away from. Once it chose me, I had no other options. I could fight it, and that was all. I had to keep fighting it.
There was no way that I could lead this pack. They’d asked me for help, and I would give them that. Once Alvin had been removed from power, I would move on. If I stayed, then this sickness would dig deeper and deeper. I would never recover from it so long as I let myself hoard power.
Bri crouched beside me. She placed a tender hand on my back as she leaned to put her face in my view. A soft smile played at her lips, so at odds with the authority she’d displayed a moment ago.
“What makes a good man, Ryder? I can tell you that it has nothing to do with clean hands. A good man isn’t one who has never struggled. Have you ever considered the fact that your challenges have made you a better person? Over and over, you do what others cannot because you know they need the help. You face the challenges that will make the world a better place, even if it darkens your soul.
“I think that is what makes you a good man. It makes you so much better than your father ever was. What you’re feeling right now? That’s nothing more than well-deserved rage. Save it for Alvin. We’ll find him.”
Bri’s words allowed me to suck in a shaky breath. I dared a glance back at the pack behind me. I expected them to look disappointed, but one by one they nodded. They had put their faith in me, and this hadn’t shaken that. They still believed that I could lead them.
Though I wasn’t convinced that the Treasure Sickness wouldn’t take me some day, I realized there was a lot to be done. I would lock my heart away for now. My feelings didn’t matter until this job was done.
When Ness was safe again, I would open that locked box and make sense of things. For now, I got to my feet and approached the pack. We had to make a plan.