That meant I had to survive tonight. No one was going to get a taste of my blood if I had anything to say about it. My hound agreed. She poured strength into me. I let it settle into my muscles and give me hope.
No matter what, tonight was going to suck, but at least I would survive.
* * *
The shifterswho had shown their support earlier now stood as far from me as they could manage. Janessa hid behind Catriona, who gave me a small nod in greeting but didn’t bother speaking to me. Haylee and Kelsey were together, at the other side of the crowd. As people moved about, I noticed that the two of them were holding hands. Their skin looked deathly pale.
They were terrified, which made me want to laugh.
I was the one in the center of this shit show, not them. They weren’t the ones about to get their tail ripped off. I’d be lucky if I made it through tonight with only a few scratches. By morning, I knew I would have a few fresh bite wounds.
Harvey stayed close by. I could feel his attention on me. He’d ripped my beanie off and tossed it on the wood pile behind the house. Now, my hair danced in the breeze. I shoved it out of my face several times before giving up.
Everyone else, including my father, seemed confused. Dad wore a look of perpetual annoyance. He glanced from face to face, but couldn’t bring himself to look in my direction. I wondered if he had an idea of what would happen, even if no one had outright told him.
Would my father come to my rescue? Would he stand up for me?
My eyes burned with tears because I knew the answer to that question. I just couldn’t bring myself to acknowledge it.
Alvin stepped forward. He threw his arms wide as he turned to address his pack. Everyone bowed their heads. I stood, stiff as a board, until Harvey palmed the back of my head and forced me to bow. My lip curled in defiance that I couldn’t afford.
“Good,” Alvin said. He raised his voice to speak to the rest of the pack. “We gather here tonight, days ahead of the full moon, because one of our packmates needs to be taught a lesson. Vanessa Blackmaw has been seen with outsiders who do not know our ways.”
Voices rose, the pack all speaking at once. They came to my defense, but no one’s voice broke above a scared whisper. I clenched my jaw tight and wished that someone had the balls to speak louder for me.
“Ness didn’t ask that outsider for help,” Kelsey said.
Everyone stopped. Silence slipped over the pack. Alvin’s footsteps retreated. Kelsey’s whimpers soon followed. The sound grated at me. I couldn’t deny the sheer panic in her voice. If Alvin so much as touched her, she might piss herself.
I’d spent so much time as the object of Alvin’s anger that his attention didn’t scare me as much as it should. Kelsey had spoken up for me, proving that she had bigger balls than some of the men present. I owed her this.
“Yes, I did.” Oh, I hated having to do this.
Silence made my ears ring. I could feel Alvin’s attention land back on me. I almost breathed a sigh of relief. Kelsey didn’t deserve Alvin’s wrath. I could handle it. Let me handle it from here.
I heard Alvin’s footsteps approach. Harvey’s hand fell away right before Alvin gripped my chin. I hated being trapped between the two of them.
Alvin’s breath washed over my skin when he leaned in and asked, “Who did you pledge your allegiance to, Vanessa?”
Bite your tongue. Bite your tongue. Bite your—
“This pack,” I said.
Alvin’s eye twitched. I’d answered his question, but not the way he wanted. Though he’d dedicated the past nine years to breaking me, I’d refused to bend. Despair had crept into my mind, but I wasn’t ready to let it win.
“And who runs this pack?” His spittle sprayed my cheek.
I flinched. My hound wanted to bite him, but I couldn’t let her take over right now. Harvey would knock me on my ass before I could get away.
I bit down on the inside of my cheek. Nine years ago, a new shifter, I’d been shoved onto my knees in front of Alvin. I could still remember the derision on his face when he realized what I was. They’d forced me to pledge to him that day. There was a scar on my left cheek from a piece of gravel that’d been pressed into my skin from how hard they’d held me down.
I’d had no say in the matter. Later that day, my father had told me that I’d done the right thing. The pledge would make sure that Alvin protected me despite what I’d become. I hadn’t understood the prophecy yet. All I’d known was that Alvin had become enemy number one.
“Who runs this pack?” Alvin shouted into my face.
His breath smelled like rotten ass.
I wondered what Ryder was doing. I imagined he was watching a sitcom in his perfect living room. Did I cross his mind? Was he worried about me? It didn’t matter. I had to rely on myself.