9
ADDIE
Iwas surprised to find Maddox still here in the morning. He stood with his back to the counter, a mug of steaming coffee under his nose like the scent alone would be enough to energize him. I bowed my head nervously as I pushed past him to make tea.
“Can you ever shut them out?” Maddox asked without preamble.
I remained silent for a long while. “No.”
Thoughts of last night made me reach for my rosary. I wanted to pull a hat over my head so I could veil, but I figured it would look odd in my kitchen at this hour of the day. Maddox wouldn’t understand, not really.
The hard beads of my rosary were enough for now. I pinched them between my fingers and stared at the star-like light in the very center of the beads.
Not all of them had that light. I’d wondered if the rosary had different stones, but I couldn’t tell the difference between the beads other than the little bit of light that seemed to sit in the very center of some.
“Why couldn’t you tell me more?” I asked under my breath.
“Hm?” Maddox raised a brow.
I shook my head and mumbled, “It’s nothing.”
I knew why Mom hadn’t shared more. I’d only been a child when she was taken away from me. Our arcana was dark. Had she told me everything I needed to know now, I would have suffered from nightmares for years. As it was, I didn’t start having them until my pre-teen years. Puberty did all sorts of evil things to my arcana, causing it to act up in horrible ways.
“I hate to be this person, but you really live like this?” Maddox set his coffee mug aside.
I looked around my kitchen. It was clean and well decorated. Everything was neatly organized, making navigation so easy that even he could make himself coffee without having to ask where the ingredients were. I couldn’t believe that he was chiding me for my clean kitchen…
He wasn’t.
I could have face-palmed, but that would have given away my naïve train of thought. Maddox’s question had wildly different intentions. After last night, his meaning should have been clear. To be fair, I hadn’t gotten much sleep.
Jaden’s true-death haunted me. I hadn’t wanted to do it. His soul would live on forever in my conscience.
“Yeah. I live like this.”
I took my cup of tea and slipped out of the kitchen. There wasn’t much of a back yard behind the house, but I had a neat little deck with comfortable chairs. The chill morning fog kissed my cheeks like the touch of death. It was more welcome than I wanted to admit.
The first sip of coffee warmed me from the inside out. I craved a little shot of whiskey to give it a little more punch, but I would have to work later. Maybe no one would blame me for drinking, but I wasn’t about to stroll into work with a buzz.
Belatedly, I realized that the air outside was warmer than I expected. That cool wind hadn’t been from the early hour of the day. Someone nearby would die soon.
I cocked my head and scanned my surroundings. Perse’s house had been purchased by a young couple with twin toddlers. They had a family rabbit, though. I wondered if I was feeling the little thing passing on, but then the cool touch just…vanished.
I physically recoiled. It had never worked like that before. When death came, it took what it was after. I could normally feel the soul leave the body. There was always a moment where the spirit decided whether it wanted to stay or move on. I expected all small animals to move on seamlessly.
However, nothing happened. There was no spirit. No portal to the afterlife opened to let someone through. I lowered my teacup and gaped. My heart rate kicked up a notch every second until it was pounding thunderously. My ears echoed with the drum of my heart, so I couldn’t hear the door when it opened behind me.
I startled when Maddox put his hand on my shoulder. Tea sloshed over my hand, making me hiss and curse.
He jerked back. I started to apologize, but the truth of what I’d felt hit me out of nowhere. The teacup slipped out of my hand.
Maddox snatched it out of the air. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Someone died,” I said in a panicked rush.
Maddox stood, teacup in hand, and raised a brow. He’d become so accustomed to my abilities already that he didn’t understand the problem. I grabbed ahold of his shirt and tugged.
“You don’t get it,” I whispered. I glanced at the yard and the houses beyond my fence.