“That fucking hurts,” I say, biting out the words.
My moral high ground is swiftly taken away from me as Kamden’s exasperation reveals itself. “What do you want from me? The last time I left you alone—”
Raising my voice I can no longer control, I tell him, “I wasn’t alone!” Heat rolls down my spine. “This time,” I add to clarify and lower my voice. “I wasn’t alone.”
“No. You weren’t.” Kamden doesn’t back down, and his lowly spoken words are harsh.
“It’s not like I didn’t want him.”
“He’s supposed to take care of you,” Kam says.
“Since when does sex not fall under that umbrella?” My response is flippant and arrogant, and Kamden reacts with equal parts disbelief and outrage.
“Since you tried to kill yourself!”
My throat instantly dries and my attempt to swallow is painful as I lean farther away from Kamden. My lips part to object, but there are no words.
“You aren’t ... You aren’t okay,” Kam says, his voice gentler now, and his hand raised as if he’s approaching a wild animal. “It was wrong of him to touch you in any way. He was only there to make sure you didn’t hurt yourself. That was his only job. He crossed the line multiple times and I can’t ignore that. You matter to me. Your safety matters to me.”
His only job. A sarcastic huff leaves me although my fight has waned. The first time I saw Zander, I wanted him. I was drawn to him. A piece of me needed him. It didn’t have a damn thing to do with a job opportunity.
In my silence, Kamden repeats, “He was supposed to take care of you, protect you. Not sleep with you.”
Was.Kamden speaks of Zander as if he’s in the past tense.
They’re going to take him away from me. I can hardly breathe. I would beg them, if that’s what they want. I will beg them. It takes a moment for me to gather my composure and my dignity.
Licking my bottom lip, I muster the courage to look Kamden in the eye and tell him, “I’ll tell the judge it was all of you.”
My words are met with a deafening silence. “I’ll tell him each one of you abused me.”
“Ella.” Kamden ushers his warning in a whisper.
“Not you … but if you make me, I’ll tell the judge you knew.” If I’m not above begging, I’m damn sure not above blackmail, defamation, or whatever the fuck this is. “You won’t take him away from me.”