***Reagan***
Meganhadruntrack in school and it was clear that she hadn’t slowed down any. I stretched my legs and walked as fast as I could after her. She didn’t bother looking over at me. “Do you know how many times I tried to call you after you left?”
I waved to Margaret as we practically ran out of the building. “It was a lot. I know. I’m sorry, Meg. Can we talk? I’d really like to—”
She unlocked a Jeep next to us and started climbing in, so I raced around and climbed in the passenger seat, earning a glare from her. “Hundreds of times, Reagan. I tried calling you hundreds of times. I could tell you the exact number if I was sad enough to look through the diary I kept back then because I wrote it down. The day I stopped calling, I counted the times I tried to call to assure myself that I’d given my best effort.”
“Of course, you did. You were my best friend, Meg. You didn’t deserve what I did. I want to apologize, but I feel like I’m racing through it right now and you deserve more than that. Can we just stop for a second?”
She started the Jeep and backed out of her spot. “You can talk while I drive or you can get out now.”
“I’ll talk while you drive.” I stared over at her while she pulled onto the highway and couldn’t help smiling. Her nose was pierced and I could see more than a few tattoos peaking out from under her clothes. “You look great.”
“Fuck off.” She glanced over at me and frowned. “Don’t try to flatter me into forgetting how awful you were.”
“I’m not. It’s just an observation. You branched out. I like it.”
“Thanks.” After a beat, she begrudgingly looked back over and nodded. “You look good, too. You didn’t grow warts and a third boob like I’d hoped.”
I laughed loudly and felt a small crack form in her wall as she smiled. “I was wrong. I knew it the moment you stopped calling. I knew it before you stopped, too, but I was stupid. I thought I needed to cut out Lunar completely. I didn’t talk to anyone that summer. Russ and my parents only got me to call them by threatening to call the cops.”
“I know. Russ came to me, begging me to tell him where you were. He didn’t believe that you hadn’t told me. You and I told each other everything. Why wouldn’t I know?” Megan sighed and parked on the side of the road. “I can’t pretend to know what you went through. Jenny was brutal to you. I would’ve gone with you in a second, though, Reagan.”
Tears filled my eyes and I stared out the window, embarrassed to still have tears to cry after a decade. “For a second that night, I thought everything I’d ever wanted was coming true. They liked me. I lost my virginity to the guys I was convinced I was in love with, I was convinced that meant they’d love me too soon, and that had to mean that we were going into real life together. I was delusional. To wake up and be slapped with reality was hard.
“No one believed they would’ve touched me. But I was also somehow a giant slut. I was so confused and things were bad at home. It was easier to believe that all of Lunar was bad and needed to be cut out. If I could get rid of it all, I could pretend like it’d never happened. As an adult, I know that’s dumb. I shouldn’t have left you. You were my best friend and you’d been there for me through everything. You deserved more than what I gave you and I really am sorry, Megan. I ended up being a really terrible friend in the end.”
She groaned and punched my arm. “Do not cry. If you cry, I’m going to cry.”
“Ow.” I rubbed my arm and laughed. “I definitely might cry now.”
“I spent a night in jail that summer.”
I gasped. “What? No way. You were even more strait-laced than me.”
“I knocked Jenny’s front two teeth out when I found out she was marrying Theo. I overheard her smugly telling someone that Theo deserved someone like her, implying that you were beneath him. So, I punched her. Hard. I spent the night in jail, had to spend the rest of the year doing community service, but Jenny will never be able to show her wedding photos without thinking of me.”
I screamed, whether in shock or joy, I wasn’t sure, and punched her back. “I could kiss you. That is the best thing I’ve ever heard. Honestly, that takes the sting right out of the fact that he married her.”
“I was so worried about you. I almost hoped that Russ didn’t tell you.”
“He didn’t. I found out a few days ago when I was standing in Jenny’s parents’ kitchen, taking a job with them. I met his daughter and found out he was married to Jenny all in the same breath. Mind you, this was after…”
“After what?” Her eyes widened and she choked, taking a second to cough and clear her throat before grabbing me. “You slept with him?”
I looked around, feeling nervous to keep it quiet. “I got drunk at the reunion. We all did. And then we all… We repeated history.”
She clapped her hands around my head and screeched in my face. “No! You didn’t!”
I made a face. “I did.”
“Oh, my god. I don’t know whether to congratulate you or smack you for letting them touch you after all that shit.” She fell back into her seat and then gasped. “Wait! You met his daughter and found out about him and Jenny after doing the dirty? What did you do?”
“What the hell was I supposed to do? I played it cool. He followed me out, did the whole ‘we need to talk’ thing, and I was all, ‘nope’. He stopped me from leaving, but then Jenny came outside and called him in, making sure to call him hon. I got out of there as fast as possible. I haven’t talked to him one on one since. If I can help it, I won’t.” I took a deep breath and scrunched up my nose. “Is it stupid that I feel hurt by it? Because I do. It happened a decade ago for everyone else, but I just found out and it sucks to know that he married her after how she treated me.”
Megan shook her head aggressively. “No! It’s not stupid. He was an asshole for marrying her.”
I nodded along. “Yeah, he was!”