TMI. And what kind of asshole announces fertility issues his ex-wife has to her new boyfriend? Or is this some pathetic attempt to make her seem undesirable, so I’ll either admit to not dating her or dump her?
I rake my gaze over his pathetic body. My money is on his being unable to provide viable sperm.
“You can never be the family she wants!” Todd continues.
“Because…?”
“You’re the type of guy who treats people like disposable…disposable…” He points at me, finger twitching in the air as his brain works overtime to come up with something cutting.
I get tired of waiting. “Razor?”
He snaps his fingers. “Yes!” Then immediately says, “No! A disposable plate! One of those paper ones, for a picnic.”
Perhaps in Todd’s world, a disposable plate is worse than a disposable razor. “Do you know when Sierra’s birthday is?” If he’s going to waste my time, he can make himself useful.
He blinks. “Sierra’s birthday?”
“Yes.” It shouldn’t be this difficult to communicate. He’s an English professor, for God’s sake.
He gives me a suspicious look, but tells me a date—my dad’s birthday.
“Are you sure?”
“Of course I’m sure! I’m her husband.”
“Ex-husband.” It’s important to be precise, even if it might not be a trait valued in his department.
Her birthday has already passed for this year. A disquieting mixture of relief and disappointment rushes through me, which is weird. It isn’t like I’m happy I don’t have to do anything for her birthday. I meant it when I decided to find out and make it more special than it’s been for a while.
“What do you have to say to that, Lasker?” Todd asks, pulling me back to the present.
I frown at him. “Are you still here?”
He takes a step into my office, places a hand on his hip and points the finger at me again. “I’m talking to you!”
“I was thinking about something important. My office hours are over now, so you should…” I wave him away.
His chest heaves with fury. That tree should’ve cracked his ribs as well so he wouldn’t be here ranting like a dramatic lunatic. “I’m not finished!”
“In that case, I’ll bill you for my time. Ten thousand dollars an hour.”
His jaw drops. “Ridiculous! No one charges that much!”
“Your particular rate happens to have an annoyance surcharge.”
“Asshole!”
“Who are you calling an asshole in my department?”
My gaze slides to the open door. Charles is standing there, bristling with outrage.
Todd points at me. “He’s trying to rip me off!”
“You aren’t a student or faculty member of this department. You don’t have the right to monopolize Professor Lasker’s time.”
Wow. Look at Charles defending me. Granted, he hates Todd, so it’s likely he’d side with me anyway, but this is going beyond the call of duty.
Charles turns to me. “Griffin, I need to speak to you for a moment if you’re free?”