“Where’s Mia?” I ask.
“Sleeping. Would you like to see her?”
The nursery is on the first level. Darcy thought it prudent not to risk stairs. “I’m not so young anymore, and my knees do creak a bit,” she said, laughing heartily.
The room is dark except for a small nightlight by the crib. I don’t need it to know that the walls are pastel pink and cream, and the one to Mia’s right has a rainbow, a unicorn and clouds painted on it because everyone knows a little princess deserves rainbows and unicorns—something I never had growing up, but want for my daughter very much.
The floor is covered with soft cork, but I tiptoe anyway.
Mia is sleeping soundly, her breathing fast but easy. Her mouth is pursed like a fresh rosebud, and I carefully brush my fingers along one plump cheek and breathe in her sweet, toddler smell. Hot emotions surge through me, and I blink away tears.
“She’s beautiful,” I whisper.
“Just like her mother,” Darcy murmurs.
I shake my head. “No. She’s not going to be anything like her mother. She’s going to be exactly like you.”
Darcy runs a gentle hand down my back. “My dear, you’re an incredible woman. Mia will be fortunate if she ends up as smart, resilient and strong as you are.”
Another fresh wave of tears stings my eyes. I look up at the ceiling for a moment, then sniffle once.
I kiss Mia on the forehead and leave the nursery. Ray’s already taken my suitcases upstairs.
“Something to drink?”
Darcy goes into the big, open kitchen. It has four burners, a griddle for pancakes and two ovens. Ray loves to cook, and he shows off his skills on Thanksgiving and Christmas.
“Water would be great.”
Darcy hands me a bottle of water from the fridge. “I’m surprised you’re back with…him.”
“Lucas,” I say, sliding onto a tall chair at the breakfast bar. “His name is Lucas Reed.”
She takes the seat next to mine. “I see.” A moment of silence. “Are you going to tell him?”
I shake my head, picking at a nonexistent hangnail. “No. I don’t think so.”
“He has the right to know, dear.” Darcy puts a hand over mine.
I flinch. “You’d have me tell him, even though he might try to take her away from you?”
“It would be tough if he insists on taking her. I’m not going to lie about it, but maybe—”
“I’m scared.”
“Ava…”
“There are so many things at stake now.” I swivel the chair so I can face her directly. “I don’t have a job anymore, and he has so much power over me—to hurt me. But at the same time…when he’s open and loving… My god, he’s amazing.”
“Do you love him?”
I stare at her.
“It isn’t a difficult question.”
Maybe not, but it’s a damn scary one. “I…yeah. I do.”
“Then let’s trust that you wouldn’t have fallen in love with a man who isn’t worthy.”