Normally Mama would be the first person I’d run to if I needed to talk. But I’m so reluctant at the moment. After her encouragement and conviction that I could do it, admitting out loud that I screwed up again is just going to make my failure unbearable.
And I’m terrified of the possibility that I might never have what I want in my personal life. Edgar seemed so perfect, the kind of solid, great guy I could build a life with. My brothers will probably all find the loves of their lives and get married and live happily ever after before me. Hell, I might even become a cat lady, who has twenty tomcats because they’re more reliable than men she dates.
But at least I have the baby. I place a hand over my belly. I’ll give him all my love, and maybe that’ll be enough. If Edgar tries to start a custody battle, I’ll sic Samantha on him.
When I walk in, everyone except Hugo’s already in the private room. We hug each other, exchanging kisses.
“You look so skinny!” Tía Bea says, running her hand along my arm. “If you hadn’t told us, I would’ve never thought you were pregnant. You gotta start eating better.”
I smile at her as we sit around the table. My family makes sure to leave an empty chair next to me for Edgar. My sense of guilt and shame intensifies. He won’t join us, ever.
I forcibly brighten my smile. “My clothes still fit the same, so I don’t think I’ve lost weight. You just think I did because you keep expecting me to turn into a mountain.”
“Not a mountain,” she says. “Just a very fashionable hill.”
“I promise I’ll get big soon enough.”
“Where’s Edgar?” Rafael asks.
My breath catches, even though I knew someone would ask. “I don’t know. I haven’t seen him all day.”
It’s not exactly a lie…just not the whole story.
“You want to text him?” Mama asks as she settles down next to Papa.
“Uh…” I slowly reach into my purse and pull out my phone. The battery’s charged, and the unit shows all four signal bars. I frown. “Crap. My battery’s dead.”
“Uh-oh. What if your clients call?” Jorge says. “Wanna charge it in my car? I have a charger.”
“Thanks, but it’s okay. I doubt anybody’s going to have their dress spontaneously combust in the next two hours or so.”
Everyone stares like I’ve shown up in a potato sack. I’ve never said anything like that about client emergencies. They’re probably all remembering the number of dinners I missed or had to leave early because of a client.
“Are you sick?” Papa turns to Diego, who’s seated next to me. “Check her temperature.”
Angel’s faster. He leans over and puts a hand on my forehead. “Feels okay.”
“I’m fine.” I roll my eyes at my brother, doing my best to act naturally. “I just don’t want to work too hard when I’m pregnant. I need to consider the health of my baby.”
My family collectively nods, and the tension around my shoulders and neck eases.
“Diego, give her something to drink. She’s tired,” Tía Bea says.
“Just water,” I say to Diego when he looks at me.
The doors open, and Hugo walks in. “Sorry I’m late,” he says. His business-casual outfit is a bit rumpled. Probably spent all day in the office.
“Your boss making you work on Saturday again?” Rinaldo says.
“Hey, what can I say? She needs me.” Hugo gives a shit-eating grin.
Bet he works overtime for free just to be around Samantha. She could be using his attraction to her. But at least she hasn’t treated him like he’s special, all the while thinking he’s perfect because she’ll never feel anything genuine for him.
Stop being so bitter. It’s for myself that I need to let this go. Clinging to resentment and anger will only hurt me. If Edgar doesn’t care enough to think he can love me, he certainly doesn’t care how I feel about him.
We all hug Hugo. He sits down next to Angel and pours himself a margarita.
“You didn’t hear it from me,” Hugo begins. “But I heard Aaron Korvid is looking for a lawyer.” A gloating grin splits his face.