10
Tegyn
“I can’t,”I said simply.
“Oh, but you can and you will.” He took a step closer and crossed his arms over his chest. I’d seen this move a lot lately and it was the equivalent of him putting his foot down.
Unfortunately, D hadn’t gotten to know the new Tegyn. Tegyn 2.0 was a ‘take no shit from anyone’ kind of girl. She didn’t get pushed into doing things she didn’t want to do. She didn’t take orders. Period.
I shook my head. “Last night was hard enough.”
“What are you talking about? Hard enough?” He groaned and his hands dropped to his sides. “Girl, you don’t even know what hard enough is. I sat up all night next to the woman I love and I did nothing but protect her and love her from afar. Being near you but not with you is killing me, but I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you safe.” He turned away and muttered under his breath, “Hard enough.”
I thought he was through. I watched him take a few steps and I wanted to say something. Obviously, this was the time in our argument when I should, but I’d frozen up the moment he used the ‘L’ word. Actually, I’d damn near passed out. He’d never said it before. He’d hinted around, but he’d always told me that he couldn’t tell me his feelings until he was truly free. My heart raced and I was torn between running away and throwing myself in his arms.
Finally, D turned around and looked me in the eyes. “I’m going to try this one more time. Maybe I didn’t explain myself well enough the first time. It could happen.” He shrugged. “Here’s the deal. I have a spare room. You can sleep there. I’m not trying to seduce you. I’m trying to keep you safe.”
“I understand that,” I admitted. “That’s not the problem here.”
“There is no problem here other than you being stubborn.” He huffed. “We’re out of options. We tried it your way. I stayed here last night. This is the first time I’ve never come home and damn, I have hated coming home. You don’t even know.” He shook his head a few times. “I have a son, Tegyn. I need to take care of him too. Don’t make me choose. Because one way or another, I’ll be there for both of you, but I’d rather not uproot him. He has had enough going on in his young life. The last thing he needs is to be in a strange home, especially when that home isn’t safe.” His brow shot up in challenge.
I shrank back. “I didn’t ask you to protect me,” I grumbled.
“That’s the thing about a man, baby. You don’t have to ask. When he cares about a woman, he’ll step up and do the right thing every time without her having to ask.” D stepped closer. “You couldn’t get rid of me right now even if you locked me out. I’d just be sleeping in my truck, bundled up with my baby boy.”
My eyes widened and I sucked in a breath as I pictured him doing just what he’d described. “You mean it, don’t you?”
“What? The camping in my truck part?” He chuckled. “Yeah. I do. Even if you are the most obstinate, pig-headed woman I know. Trying to exert your independence all the way to the hospital, or maybe the morgue even.” He shuddered. “You aren’t weak when you need help. You’re weak when you refuse help being offered.”
My shoulders slumped. I knew he was right and I kinda hated it right now. “For the record, I don’t even like you at the moment.”
D grinned. “That’s okay, baby. I love you enough for the both of us.”
My cheeks flamed. “Fine. I’ll go. But you should know I’m not happy about it. And we’re definitely not having sex. You just keep your perfect hands and your amazing penis far away from me.”
“How about my lips?” he joked.
“Those too. Just…step back. I can’t think when you’re this close.” I shook my head. “That’s not true. I think. But I think stupid shit like…why can’t he be divorced? Why can’t my divorce be final? Why don’t I just give in and allow whatever happens to happen?” I sighed.
He moved until he stood barely a hair from me. “Why don’t you?” he asked, his face positively shining with joy.
I narrowed my eyes. “I tried that once, DeSean. Look where it got me!” I stomped my foot and stalked off to my bedroom.
“Where you going?” he called after me.
“To pack. Are you fucking happy now?” I growled.
His laughter followed me. “More than you could ever imagine.”
A moment later, as I filled suitcases with clothes and personal belongings, he peeked in the doorway. “Now, you don’t need to strip the place,” he teased.
“Oh, are you one of those guys?” I asked, my brow arched angrily.
“I don’t know. What guys are those?” He frowned.
“You know, the guy who wants you to stay, but worries you might actually put down roots,” I grumbled as I emptied my underwear drawer into the nearest open piece of luggage.
“No.” He shook his head adamantly. “I’m the guy who would hire movers to get your possessions into my house, right after I carry you over the threshold.”