“Yes,” I answer quickly, not wanting to get into too many details. “What’s going on?”
“Well, we wanted to check on you, first of all. Is everything—okay?”
I pause for a moment before answering and then nod, the gesture more for Ian’s sake than anything. “It is,” I tell him firmly. “Megan is still quiet, and so is Veronica.”
“The paternity test is scheduled in a few days,” Cal says hesitantly. “If Kam—”
“If Kam isn’t here, then we wait.” I bite my lip. “Megan wants him here, and I can understand that, even if I don’t like it. In the spirit of this new thing we’re trying to—to all get along, I promised to wait. I’m keeping that promise.”
“Where are you now?” Lauren asks.
“I’m at Ian’s.” I chew on my lower lip. “I’m going to stay here for a little while. I’ll be back, though. If you’re worried about me, just call. I’ll keep you updated—I promise I won’t just disappear.”
Ian talks to Cal for a few more minutes while I go and freshen up. When I come back out in panties and one of his t-shirts—huge and oversized on me, he grins and reaches to pull me back into his arms, propped up against the pillows on the bed.
“I’m proud of you,” he says, smoothing my hair back. “Even just that conversation—I know you’re terrified of being a mother, Alana, but you’re already doing a great job. I know you’re going to be a mama bear—ready to kill anyone that threatens your cubs—but you’re compromising where you can. That’s a good thing. A good quality.”
I look up at him, feeling myself soften at his words. I’d been so afraid that Ian would think I was crazy, unreliable, undependable—unable to be a good mother when I can’t even always control what’s inside of me. But here he is, after everything, holding me in his arms and telling me how good of a mother he thinks I’ll be, how ready he is to have a family with me.
I’ve never been so glad to be wrong.
“Do you really think I’ll be a good mother?” I whisper, almost afraid to ask, still. “You’re not just saying that to get me to stay?”
Ian shakes his head. “Absolutely not,” he tells me firmly, stroking my cheek with his fingers. “Look at all the changes you’ve made already. You agreed to see Helen twice a week. All the parts of you are in agreement now, and since that talk, you’re trying. You’realltrying, and that alone proves that you’re ready to do what it takes to be a parent.” He leans down, kissing me softly. “I’m proud of you, Alana. And I have faith in you.”
He kisses me again, and I reach up, threading my fingers through his blond hair as the kiss deepens, heating up. Ian rolls onto his back, pulling me atop him as I squeak with surprise, and he grins, leaning up to kiss me again as he sits firmly on his hardening cock.
“Now,” he says with satisfaction, grunting as he thrusts up into me. “Let’s do some more practicing for the next one.”
---
Those few days between Ian and I making up and the paternity test are blissful, full of lovemaking and joking and just spending time together. We try to ignore the elephant in the room, savoring our time together, even though both of us know that part of the reason we’re so hungry for it is the chance that the results will come back in a way that neither of us wants—and then decisions will have to be made.
It’s the night before when Ian gets a call from Cal. He puts him on speaker again, sitting on the couch next to me as he sets the phone down on the coffee table.
“I got a call from Kam’s family,” Cal says slowly. “He’s back. And just in time, which I hardly think is a coincidence.”
“So he’s going to be there?” I ask nervously, glancing at Ian.
“Not at the test itself. When you open the results.” Cal hesitates. “My parents are passing along the news that Megan, for whatever reason, still wants him there for that. I hardly think he’ll refuse, with the chance that the baby is his.” The words are blunt, but neither of us is the type to mince them either. Not like Megan. I’m grateful that she and Veronica both have stayed sequestered away these past few days, letting Ian and I have our time. I just hope it’s not because Megan is hoping that when the results come back, it’ll be Kam’s, and she can banish Ian and me forever from their lives.
“And what am I supposed to be doing when the results are opened?” Ian’s voice is tight, and I can hear the fear in them that he’s trying to bite back, that this won’t go the way we want it to.
“I suggest you be as far away from where Kameron and Megan meet up as possible,” Cal says smoothly. “I can’t help you if you commit homicide, Ian. Let them work this out. We’ll deal with the aftermath when it comes.”
“And if he doesn’t like the results and decides to kidnap my girl again?” Ian growls, and I feel a warm tightness in my chest at the sound of him calling mehis girl.
“Dexter and I will both be there,” Cal reassures him. “Nothing will happen to Megan.”
“Alana. Mywife.”
“Or Alana,” Cal adds. “Oranyone. Ian, you have nothing to worry about. We all know we need to keep a close eye on Kameron from here on out.”
“I’m not worried,” Ian says, his voice still tight. “But I want to get my hands around the fucker’s throat.”
“Which is precisely why you need to keep your distance.” Cal pauses. “It’ll work out, Ian.”
Neither of us feels very confident in that as we head to the clinic for the test the next day, though. I feel sick with fear, throwing my breakfast up for the first time in months, and no matter how much Ian reassures me, I can’t shake how terrified I am to do this. What if the baby turns out to be Kam’s, and my whole world will come crashing down again. Megan doesn’t seem to understand the severity of what Kam did—she still wants him there for the results, for fuck’s sake!