Her eyes widen, pupils dark. “Think of me? Don’t think of me, Jem!”
“Why not?”
“Don’t, just don’t…” Ruby heads for the door. What the hell is happening? She talks about us and what we’re hiding, then instead of sorting things out pushes me away. We need to have this conversation; she’s right. Put this to rest. Move on. I jump off the bed.
“Don’t leave, I’m sorry,” I say.
“I have to go.”
“Forget the song, let’s deal with this other shit, then we can draw a line and move on.”
Ruby’s teary eyes meet mine.What did I do?
“How do we fix this? What happens on the TV with this URST crap?” I ask.
“Nothing for about three seasons.Move.” She attempts to open the door and I place my palm on the smooth wood to prevent her. “Please.”
“Three seasons? We can’t go that long. What happens after three seasons?”
“I want to leave, Jem.” Ruby’s hand trembles and she pulls at the handle.
“What happens?” I repeat.
She turns a furious face to me. “They kiss. They fuck. Then the world jumps in and pulls them apart. Either that or they marry, have beautiful children, and live in a house in the country. Either way, things are dealt with.Move.”
I touch her hair, pushing a tangle from her face and she slumps against the door as my fingers linger on her cheek.
“Kiss?”
“Jem, please don’t.”
This is torture, not whatever the hell stupid name she calls it. I hold Ruby’s face in both hands, rubbing my thumb along her cheek where the tear fell, inhaling the warmth emanating from her. She closes her eyes as I move my mouth to taste her lips.
“Don’t do this. Don’t take us there.” She twists her head away the moment my lips almost skim hers. “Stop, Jem!”
Her words, the shortness of breath… What a dick move, cornering a girl who’s recently escaped an abusive ex. I step back. Ruby’s wary but thankfully, there’s no fear in her eyes. Worse—disgust.
“Back off. I’m not going to fuck you,” she says.
“I don’t want to fuck you.”
“You just tried to kiss me.” Her eyes harden.
“Last I knew they were two separate acts.”
“In my experience, one always leads to the other.” She takes a ragged breath. “I come here because I think you’re my friend and then…” She waves a hand. “All this!”
“This?”
“You. Being nice then trying to kiss me, playing songs to serenade me into your fucking bed! Well, you chose the wrong song! And the wrong girl!” Ruby drags her palm across a cheek, wiping a new tear.
“That’s not what I’m doing. You were the one talking about sexual tension. I thought—”
“Because I hoped we’d deal with the issue and move on. This wasn’t a fucking invitation.”
Whoa, this girl is on a short, and very confusing, fuse. “Fine. I get that.”
“So I can leave now? You won’t stop me?”
“I wouldn’t ever stop you doing what you wanted, Ruby.”
“Good. Then leave me the hell alone!”
She drags the door open and as it slams behind her, I’m dazed at how quickly her mood shifted. And annoyed with myself for screwing this up. Sometimes, I need to learn to listen to the part of me that screams ‘stop what you’re doing or everything will go to shit’.