He lets out a small sigh and when his eyes wander up, I know he’s deep in thought, thinking of his next question. “If I don’t like the food, will you pack my lunches? My mom used to do that on spaghetti day for me.”
I clear my throat, not having the heart to tell him that I can’t cook for shit. “Yeah. I thought you liked spaghetti, though.” I distinctly remember him telling me once that it’s one of his favorite foods.
He scrunches up his nose. “I do, but they used to always put these big tomato pieces in it at my other school and it was disgusting.” He sticks his tongue out and makes a retching noise. The elderly couple that we walk past, sitting on a bench, looks on in disapproval but I only laugh at his dramatics.
When we get to the park, Tanner goes straight for the slide. There are a handful of other kids playing and he starts talking to one of them as he waits for his turn to go down the slide.
I sit down on a bench by myself, turning Lilly’s stroller to where she’s facing me. The park is made for kids on the older side, more around Tanner’s age, and besides the baby proof swing, there’s not actually anything that Lilly could play on. It’s fine though, because she seems to be content enough playing with the rubber duck in her hands.
I take in the couple of vendors who seem to be regulars at the park as they chat and joke with parents. My eyes stop on the ice cream stand. Seeing an advertisement for cookies and cream ice cream, I decide we’ll get some when we’re about to leave.
“Aunt Ivy! Aunt Ivy! Look!” I glance up to find Tanner standing by the monkey bars. When he sees my gaze is on him, he climbs up the small stairs and my heart nearly gives out when he grabs onto the bar with one hand and starts to dangle with a huge smile on his face as he rocks back and forth.
“Tanner! Use two hands!” I tell him, knowing it’s only a matter of time before his grip fails and he slips.
I cringe at the thought.
“But it’s a trick, Aunt Ivy!” I don’t miss the slight irritation in his voice.
“Tanner,” I say in warning and with a sigh, loud enough for me to hear across the park he grabs on with his other hand.
I let out a breath of relief.
I keep an eye out for anymore of his tricks as he plays while also entertaining Lilly. She giggles as I tickle her tummy and the sound warms my heart.
“She’s so cute, how old is she?” I look up to find a man with blonde hair and fair skin smiling at me.
“Two,” I tell him, forcing a smile on my face.
“Ah, the terrible twos.” He laughs, his head tilting back. It’s one of those fake, obnoxious laughs and it makes me frown. He stops laughing and looks at me, the smile back on his face, obviously not picking up on my mood. “I’m surprised she’s staying peacefully in her stroller. I couldn’t get my daughter to sit down for two seconds at that age.”
I let out a fake laugh of my own, but it’s more subdued. I try to make it polite and dismissive.
“I’m Jared,” he holds out a hand to me.
You’re totally not getting the message dude.
I take his hand and shake it quickly. “Ivy.”
“Well, it’s lovely meeting you, Ivy. I’m sure we’ll be seeing more of each other. My daughter loves this park.” He points to a blonde-haired girl who appears to be around Tanner’s age. She’s on the swing, using her feet to push herself back and forth.
“Yea, sure.” I push my hair out of my face and give him a small wave goodbye.
He leaves, returning to a bench on the other side of the park. I know my attitude was rude, but honestly, I can’t be expected to become a completely different person in a matter of weeks. I’ve cut out the drugs, the alcohol, the partying, the bad boys, but I’ve never been a people person unless I was under the influence and that’s not going to change anytime soon.
“I’m ready to go, Aunt Ivy.” Tanner walks over to me with a satisfied grin on his face and beads of sweat running down his forehead.
“Okay,” I ruffle his curly hair, smiling when he swats at my hand. “How about we get some ice cream?”
“Yes!” He pumps a fist in the air and starts moving toward the ice cream stand before I can even stand.
I hurry after him and order myself an ice cream cone with three scoops of cookies and cream ice cream. Tanner gets chocolate with two scoops and I get Lilly one scoop of vanilla ice cream hoping it’ll soothe her gums.
We walk home in silence as everyone enjoys their ice cream. Mine tastes better than it probably is as the sugar curves the itch I still have for cigarettes. It’s the reason I went out and bought a party size bag of suckers the day we moved in. I told myself they were for the kids, but I’ve been averaging about five a day and the kids have yet to have any.
My thoughts are abruptly cut off as we turn into the yard and something runs into my legs. I drop my ice cream in shock, the cool liquid seeping into my clothes as my mouth drops open.
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.