Especially when he groans, “I’m going to come. Are you ready to swallow my load?” He pulls out and takes himself in his fist, pumping up and down in a blur.
I hold my mouth open, tongue out just in time to catch the first rope of cum. The taste makes me gag all over again, but he doesn’t notice. He’s too busy coating my tongue and lips with one spurt after another until he finally lets out a resounding sigh. He’s satisfied, and thank god for that.
I swallow what he left on my tongue, then wipe my lips with the back of my hand. I guess I should be grateful he didn’t get it in my eyes. At least he tried to aim. Such a gentleman.
“See?” I tease with a smile I don’t feel. “I told you that would do the trick. Don’t you feel better?”
The satisfied grin on his lips falters, and his gaze turns ruefully. “This stays between you and me.” He wraps the towel around him again. Not that he needs to now. I’ve seen what it’s covering. I’ve had it in my mouth and everything.
“Of course,” I murmur as I climb to my feet. I can’t wait to brush my teeth, but I don’t want him to think I’m as disgusted as I feel. I need him to walk away from this thinking it was fun, not a bad idea.
“Not, of course.” He lowers his brow. I’d swear his eyes get darker, too. “You’re not going to tell anyone about this. Say it.”
“I’m not going to tell anyone about sucking your dick.” I lift a shoulder. “Who would I tell, anyway? It’s not like I have any friends here.” Or anywhere. “And you’re the only person I’ve seen so far.”
“Yes, but it can’t always be this way. Eventually, you’re going to have to start attending classes.”
“I won’t say a word then, either.” I’d make a big X over my chest, but that might be overdoing it a little. Besides, it seems to be enough to convince him. He leaves the room, and a moment later, I hear him in his bedroom. It’s almost a shame he can’t walk around in that towel all day.
I need to get a hold of myself. He’s not some hot guy. I can’t even afford to think of him as a man. He’s my captor.
Only now, I have something on him, and he’d better hope he never gives me a reason to use it.
14
LUCAS
Goddamnit. What the fuck is wrong with me? It was one thing to keep her here. I could say it was to keep her safe from rumors and accusations. That I’m doing it to punish her for her role in what was done to my daughter. My flesh and blood.
But this? My cock is soft now, but it wasn’t a minute ago in Delilah’s mouth. I should’ve left her kneeling there, feeling like an asshole.
Instead, I let all my old shit take over, and now the worst possible thing has happened.
I liked it, and I want more. Not even so much the blowjob, which was fine and everything. I want to use her the way I did back there. I poured all my anger and guilt over Aspen into her. I punished her because I couldn’t punish myself enough.
Lauren would be so pleased with me if she knew I was connecting the dots like this. She might even say I’m growing. No, on the other hand, growth would mean stopping myself before making a pathetic mistake like letting a teenager suck my dick.
She’s nothing. She’s nobody. I shouldn’t even bother asking myself questions like that. It’s something that happened, and it’ll never happen again. Besides, if I’m being honest with myself, I have to admit it felt damn good. It’s been a long time since I’ve vented my anger that way. Now I remember why I liked it so much. Being in control. Making somebody else hurt the way I was hurting. Getting off on their discomfort or pain.
It seems like this girl brings out all the worst parts in me. But it’s not like I can let her go. Obviously, I need to figure out a plan because the way things are going, I’ll end up fucking my entire life.
We eat dinner in silence. Only once do I look at her and find her smirking down at her plate. I want to ask what the hell she’s smirking about, but I know the answer. The snide little bitch thinks she has something to hold over my head. She can only do that if I make a big thing about it, so I can’t let myself do it even when I want to climb over the table, take her throat in my hands, and demand she tell me what the fuck is so funny.